Just want to cry but cant

[Kevin160]

Hey..

Things just keep going wrong, beside of all the fights this week, mental struggles, extreme pressure from studying and memorizing books by heart, im not exaggerating when i say i never knew a human can memorize that much..sleep problems , you name it ..today my phone got shattered , so to add to this shitty year l apart from little details here and there that just make me feel like i had it up to here ...

After my phone broke , i felt just sad , that why does everything bad happen to me and not anyone around me, i know i cant assume that and i dont know, but it really seems that way

I just felt like i wanted to cry so badly that everything is wrong and i want to just let it out, but i cant, idk why, i feel sad, lonely, no family support, no friend support, nothing, and just panic, pressure,fear,migraines,fear of physical attacks and symptoms .. and i still cant believe this is my life now ..

Again im just here to vent, it makes me feel better ..i have been feeling calmer at times but still i have setbacks , but i just sometimes feel evrything piling up suddenly ..like the calm before the storm as they say

[Kkimm]

I am really sorry to hear what a bad year you are having Kevin. You really have had such alot to deal with.

I so hope things start to improve for you soon.

My very best wishes.

Kim

[Kat63]

Sometimes it feels like everything goes wrong. But try to believe that’s only a feeling - it’s not a fact.

[Kevin160 in reply to Kat63]

Yes i know thats sometimes the case, and i might be wrong, but i just really feel that everyone around me is just healthy , happy, successful, has great families, alot of money , and im just here suffering from anxiety, physical symptoms,im young but i feel 70 because of all the bad pain, physical problems ..family issues, constant migraines, and alot of fear ..

[Kat63 in reply to Kevin160]

Are you comparing your insides to other people’s outsides?

[galletas]

I'm a really f'ed-uped person and I just read your post. I'm glad you vented. This is a safe place to do so. Keep venting! You are under very real pressures and have a right to have strong feelings and to vent. I'm glad to hear you're studying. If the school you're attending has counseling support, please take advantage of that. I did. Somehow I made it through a graduate degree even though I'm f'ed up and counseling therapy was critical to my surviving. In my case it was free to students. Please avoid comparing yourself to others. I do myself a great deal of harm doing this and I don't want you suffering from this too. Stick around this group and participate because it will help. I hope we can help you feel less lonely.

[Kevin160 in reply to galletas]

Thank you so much for your advice, trust me im a fucked up person too

Youre right this is a great place, i have been here since january and i owe most of my mental improvement to all the guys who helped me ..but the problem with mental health is that you get out of the problem, another one replaces it immediately

First i had blood pressure,pulse, and health anxiety in general after a doctors appointment pointed out that...i wasnt educated about anxiety, nor blood pressure and to this day i dont know how i survived that night of panic and just knowing 100% that i will die, since then it got worse, then better, i got over it , stopped measuring my bp obsessiveky, then just general panic attacks started for no reason, constant anxiety stayed for no reason, i got severe physical and mental problems ..and my family werent any support ..then after that i started getting severe derealization, even feeling weird when i move, feeling like im paralyzed,then the whole anger thing, sadness, loneliness, exam stress, my moms cancer relapse scare, when they suspected it came back ..fights with all my family ..feeling hopeless, sleepless nights, but thankfully im a bit better

[Urchin_girl]

Just saying let it out.. scream in to a pillow.. yell.. go to gym punch it out.. it’s not fair.. it’s hard it sucks... sometimes you need to release all the cortisol the body is building up from all the stress.....as THEY say... this too shall pass..... then something else smacks us in the face.. venting helps..

[Kevin160 in reply to Urchin_girl]

So true, thank you so much ❤️

[pink318]

Hello Kevin,

I’m so sorry you are going through such a tough time. I hope you will be blessed by being in the forum and it will help you not to feel alone and less lonely.

I pray for peace and strength so you can keep going each day. We are here for you so please keep us posted. I hope things will go well with you. God bless.

[Kevin160 in reply to pink318]

You are very kind, thank you alot

[pink318 in reply to Kevin160]

Hi Kevin,

How are you today? I hope you are feeling well.

Please keep us posted.

[Kevin160 in reply to pink318]

Thank you so much for asking , im feeling a bit better , the heart palpitations and irrational thoughts still come and go , but im feeling calmer because i finished my exams and im at a break , my family are all ok and doing well, less fights and problems so its easier to feel calm ..but sometimes we fight and to add more to my stress it worsens alot and fear takes over ..but im feeling better this week

[Eagle257]

Big hug...

[Kevin160]

Thank you, thankfully so far so good, things are getting better and im more hopeful