Guess I’ll give it a try

I’m new on here, sort of. Been reading a lot of other people’s posts, but been struggling to force myself to put myself out there. Don’t really think this will help me out honestly, but I gotta start somewhere. I’m 41, married with 4 kids and I’ve struggled with anxiety, depression and anger issues for as long as I can remember. Had a really shitty day at work which got me extremely angry, which in turn I always turn in on myself while at the same time being a total dickhead to everyone I encounter, including my wife which just made me feel even more like shit. Sometimes I just don’t know wtf I’m doing anymore. I’ve lived my whole life just bottling up any emotions and putting on that happy carefree face. Sorry for wasting anyone’s time, guess I thought at least writing it down might help.

[Agora1]

Welcome to this amazing forum h8myself. You are not wasting your time or ours.

Actually you have just taken the first step forward by reaching out for support.

There are 40,000 members from all over the world in our virtual little family

Someone, somewhere has the answers for you since we all suffer the same, man

or woman at any age. Rather than stay stuck, it's time to take off that mask in that

"everything is okay" and start living your life and not just exist.

Take our hands as we take the steps together in understanding and supporting

because we care. I'm glad you are here. xx

[sweetiepye]

I find it helpful. You will find answers in the way people respond to you. It takes some time, but I've learned a lot about myself. I hope you will also. You sound as if you could use some peace and for someone to just listen to how you feel. When you come home feeling tired and angry let your wife know and ask her for a little extra understanding. She will feel needed instead of attacked. Sometimes little changes help. Pam

[Calmonoutside]

One of the best things that ever happened in my marriage, was when my husband had an anxiety attack, which caused him to finally talk to me about his stress.

He was wonderful, but would blow up randomly and without provocation. My children and I always felt we were walking on eggshells around him, because we never knew what would set him off.

Having suffered from anxiety myself, I convinced him to see our family doctor. The doctor felt he was suffering from mild bi polar disorder, and prescribed a low dose of Paxil. He is so much happier, and in control now.

That you are on here, is a great step in the right direction. Things can get better, please take care of yourself, I’m sure your wife and kids need you to be healthy and happy.