very depressed

[frailstateofmind44]

Hi everyone. I’m Erin and this is my first time joining any type of support group so please forgive me if this is a lengthy post. I’ve been really struggling and I’m hoping this forum could help make a difference. Basically, I’ve felt extremely depressed for the last 4-5 months and can’t seem to shake it. It feels like it’s just getting worse and I’m at a loss on how to help it. I don’t really have anyone to just vent to about this topic so I appreciate any support I can get.

Some background: I’m about to turn 29 and have experienced depression and GAD for several years. About 6 months ago I moved back to my small hometown after living in Florida for the past 7 years and I’ve been staying with my parents who luckily are really great. I made the decision so I could have a new change of scenery and be closer to family again. It was a huge life transition for me to come back and I haven’t been dealing with it well. I’m starting to doubt my decision to move and where I am in life and feel so unhappy. I’ve lost so much self-esteem that it’s caused me to shut down and practically isolate myself. I’m single and don’t have any friends in the area so I feel like a failure and don’t know how to help myself at this point. I’ve tried putting myself out there to meet people and make friends but it’s been really hard due to not even wanting to leave the house lately. I’m also having trouble with sleeping too much, difficulty concentrating, and just overall feeling hopeless. I’m taking 2 antidepressants and xanax as needed plus I have a therapist but don’t feel like they are a good match for my needs.

Thank you so much to everyone who takes the time to read this, I really appreciate it and I’m looking forward to receiving any support anyone has to offer

[Agora1]

Hi new friend. I'd like to Welcome you to a caring forum. I'm happy you

have chosen to try our community. We help each other through our own

experiences in life. You have just taken the first step in not feeling so alone

and maybe getting the answers you need. We care xx

[BlueAgave]

Welcome! Sorry you're having a tough time right now. It's good that you have caring parents to stay with, you're not alone although you may feel that way. Maybe you can try finding a different therapist that is a better fit. No harm in that, it's important to have someone you feel comfortable talking to. I wish you the best and keep posting!

[Astro_potato in reply to BlueAgave]

I agree 100% about possibly finding another therapist. A truly good therapist can be hard to find sometimes, but totally worth the effort.

[gajh]

Hello Erin Welcome.

[April2024]

Welcome. Sorry you aren't feeling well. I would like to tell you about the Calm app. I found it and I love it. Can you think of positive things about moving? Do you have friends at work? What about a rec center for some exercise, if you can get the energy.

I really hate to hear that you are taking Xanax. I know two people who have taken it and they became addicted. It is hard to kick. There are better alternatives if you would like to think about it.

Hope some of this helps.

[Hidden]

Wow, you could be writing my story. I live in NH all my life and in 2014 decided to move to TX and then to NC. It was very traumatic. I started to settle here in NC and was doing pretty well until April 2022 when a bunch of traumas happened all at once; major surgery, my 15 yr old dog died, and I had a heart attack. I got a psych dr and she put me on all kinds of meds that made me feel worse and suicidal. I got a therapist who I've been with since Jan 2023 and now she's moving so I have to find a new therapist. I'm on my 3rd psychiatrist and more med changes. We sold our house and moved again in March 2023 so I'm in a new small town and just adjusting well. I read all these messages on this forum and just feel so bad for all of us who are suffering alone. I wish we could all get together in a big room and just be together and hug each other. Thank you for sharing your story. It makes me remember that I'm not alone even though I'm alone. If that makes sense.

[Hidden]

Hi and welcome. You're not alone. You'll find lots of support here and people who understand.

[Pitalife]

Hi and welcome, hope you get some relief and gain knowledge you seak through joining this group, hope you the best...

[Cookie2217]

Hi there and welcome to the group. I'm glad that you joined and you will find many people here who are caring and supportive so you don't have to feel alone anymore. Making a move is one of the most stressful situations in life and it is a huge transition to undertake and of course you feel alone because you don't know anybody in the area any longer. Do you have a part-time or full-time job yet? Maybe you could volunteer at a local animal shelter or something like that to meet people your age that you have similar interests with possibly? Look into local community events that they have in your area and go you never know who could be in the crowd that you may need that day. Please don't feel like a failure you're not and if no one has told you this before you are enough, you are worthy and you are fearfully and wonderfully made by God himself and he makes no mistakes. I lost my job and ultimately my home in 2023 and I'm now living in my sister's basement we've been here for 8 months and for the last 7 I've been depressed as hell sitting in complete darkness and laying in bed day in and day out because I hated it here we're out in the middle of nowhere and the closest Walmart is actually 30 minutes away I'm used to a community where I have friends close by and even if we didn't see them every day the opportunity was there if we wanted it and now we're 2 hours away but we made the trip often as New Jersey was our home all our lives. I have been through a severe depressive episode for the last 4 years which has been hell on Earth and the most destructive and debilitating event in my entire lifetime. I can't even begin to describe the pain and despair and just loss of every single interest I ever had while going through this I had no desire to do anything which included laying in bed all day and I was completely debilitated where I didn't even go to work for a week and a half and almost got let go from my current job. I talked to my boss and let her know I had depression and she understood but said that I needed to be dependent upon and I have been ever since we had that talk she's a really nice person and gave me a second chance I work at a daycare center with children which is hard because I'm 54 now I'm no spring chicken anymore and picking the kids up putting them in the tables picking them up to change diapers is really hard so she told me that she was going to switch me to her other center where I would be with four and five year olds which are a lot more self- sufficient they would need any diaper changes and they all can feed themselves properly and they would be dropping food all over the place so it would be a lot less stressful for me. That center is only a mile and a half from my house and she told me she was moving me there in the summer which will be great. My husband and I are choosing to move to Florida September 1, 2024, and it's both exciting but scary at the same time as we are leaving everyone and everything that we've ever known behind but it's only a 3 hour plane ride so I'll be back at least once a year to visit family and friends most likely in the fall so I could see the foliage which I would miss living in Florida. My husband Paul and I also have family and friends that live in Florida that are willing to help us with our transition to our new Florida lifestyle so we're looking forward to decorating our new house that we are going to buy so we're never in this predicament again. I want to tell you that some things that help me through my depression were journaling my feelings to get them off my chest, purposeful slow breathing where you breathe in for 5 seconds hold it for 6 seconds and breathe it out for 7 seconds and by doing this it automatically calms you down if you are anxious. I also practice gratitude each morning where I think about the things that I am grateful for like my wonderful husband and my beautiful Maine Coon cat Bella. I'm also grateful for the roof over my head. I'm hoping that these suggestions help you and I would love to hear how you're doing so please keep in touch. Wishing you the best try and hang in there this too shall pass.