Okay... I have this weird thing where I’m just.. sickened by the texture of wet paper or finished wood like popsicle sticks or wet paper bags. I’ve always had this issue to some extent, but it’s gotten worse over the passed few months. I dwell on it. I can think about scraping my teeth on a popsicle stick and just it gives me goosebumps and makes me nauseous. I’ve tried exposing myself to it (not so much with my teeth lol) and it seems to help, but then I start thinking about it again and cringe at the thought - although, I’ve noticed that the stimuli itself isn’t nearly as emotionally and mentally harmful as the thought process. That’s big for me. Here’s my theory: my thinking pattern has changed over the passed few years as I’ve suffered from PTSD or whatever and it dramatizes my fears. I make a big deal out of nothing and have trouble not making a big deal out of nothing. What is just an old “nails on a chalkboard” stimuli for distain has become something I find myself obsessing about - not just this, lol, but more traumatizing events. I’m drawn to them like a moth to a flame. I’m focusing on them in some strange effort to process them, I think - these fears and harsh memories. That’s all for now. I know this probably isn’t a healthy way of coping. Thought redirection would probably better suit the circumstance, but anyway, just a little thing that bothers me and I find it hard to get passed. Not looking for advice, really, just sharing.
Weird, but worth telling, I guess. - Anxiety and Depre...
Weird, but worth telling, I guess.
I have the popsicle thing so bad!! I thought I was the only one. 🤗
Ah, it makes me cringe just thinking about it, haha. Ugh..
I was cringing when I read it. It's a horrible feeling to just imagine it. That and pixie Stix between the teeth. 😣
Ugh.. yes. You know exactly what I'm talking about. Sometimes if I grab my shirt with wet hands, I get the same feeling.
I’m the same with some textures like 3D pictures made with lined ridges! Even the thought of touching it makes me have goose bumps all over! We all have sensory aversions or sensory needs. I’m a SEN professional and support worker, so I see this all the time in my job. Slow and positive exposure can work in the end! So when experiencing the exposure to the lollipop sticks for example, play music that you love, burn a fragrance oil that smells good and do something positive that you like before and after.
You’ve probably already tried it, but CBT would be great for this and your PTSD.
I agree it sounds like your inner thinking that’s causing this and it’s a trigger for you. That could be the cause or it’s a simple sensory aversion that triggers the negative thoughts.
Not surprised you’re drawn to negative thoughts etc as what ever caused your PTSD would be the drive behind that. You actually probably feel slightly more in control of these fears if you seek them, rather than them just happening in your life. Anxiety is so strong and it’s the fear of the worst outcome that can occur, so your seeking it as it’s easier then to deal with (that’s what your body thinks anyway) it’s making always in flight or fight mode!
I know you said you weren’t looking for advice lol but I wanted to share my thoughts in case anyone else is suffering the same.
I’m British so lollipop stick - popsicle stick! 😂
I'm the same way with popsicle sticks. I have it with pizza boxes and brown paper bags too. I hate to touch them. Ughh...
I have an issue with seeing ice cubes in commercials, I have to look away because I know they are plastic and it really grosses me out. I am gagging literally! I also have a problem with touching anything with really dry hands, paper 'especially', and clothing or blankets it feels Velcro-y and it really grosses me out. I guess the reason for the grossing out with the fake ice thing, because I was at a BBQ one time and the guest of the party had some plastic star shaped beverage cooler things, they have liquid inside and you freeze them up, and stick them in your beverage to keep it cold. It is suppose to keep the beverage from getting all watered down. Anyway, as people were using them, they were putting them in their mouth and it really grossed me out, dumped my drink and drank water from a bottle the rest of the time and a few days later, several of the people were down with the flu and I know darn well that those things were the cause of the outbreak. I am very much a germophobic and I spent the following two weeks taking every medicine I could muster to not get sick, it didn't work. I was sick for two weeks and the guest felt so bad, that they paid for my medical bills. Well....I sort of told them that they were to blame for me getting sick and I missed work for a week, which I could not afford to do.
So, I kinda get what you are dealing with. I go to counseling and get a therapy called EMDR and cognitive desensitization it helps me a lot. Hope you can figure out how to deal with this.
i also hate wooden popsicle sticks, tooth picks, a metal fork or spoon touching teeth, foil anywhere in the mouth, even licking foil, dry hands wiping a dry towel, hands rubbing on pants, when a person shakes their leg while sitting (especially when it makes the floor or table shake), watching someone bite their nails (i literally need to walk away), slurping through straw, hearing someone whistle, cracking gum, someone sucking candy, someone chewing w/ their mouth open, the feel of harsh polyester, last but not least jazz music. it’s very chaotic to me. well now, you all know me better than my family lol