Confused

[porcupyne]

I’m having severe loneliness

I have no real friends and a toxic family

That I stay away from. How do I reach out

To good people? I’m always to generous and get taken advantage of?

[Pugglesworth]

Hi Porcu.

We are never truly alone: it only feels that way. And you are reaching out here. We do need human interaction and you're right to want that. You could begin at church (if you have a particular belief system) or university (if one of those are close). Both usually have groups you can join: bookclubs, seminars, free readings. You could attend presentations at local botanical gardens, join local hiking clubs, go bird watching, attend a play and stay for the 'meet and greet'. All good ways to start your search. And you will make friends. You will find commonality. It will take time, but it will be worth it.

[hypercat54]

Hi you go to places where you can meet others whether it be work or socially. When you find someone you like start chatting with them more but beware of getting too close too quickly. This can scare others off or they can start to abuse your kindness. Take it slowly at first. You might find they either don't want to be friends with you, have enough friends already, or are content to leave it at the acquaintance stage. This is normal.

Keep being your true self with others and eventually you will make some good friends. You need to consider your own needs too to stop others taking advantage of you. You will need to put boundaries in place. Good luck. x

[Hidden]

Have you tried any volunteer work? Only good folks do that...great place to meet new people... I wish you all the best!

May you have a beautiful day!

Dump trucks of love, peace, light, joy & hugs!!!

[Coco69]

Hi,

Could you try joining a gym, club or is it possible to get a dog as a companion and way to meet other local dog walkers? They’re always friendly.

[Raven3838]

I know that feeling all too well. I am definitely a work in progress, but I am here to talk if you'd like.

[Hidden]

Hi Porcu,

I am in a similar situation myself though I am so grateful to have two really close friends.

However, I realize now that I never really learned how to make friends and being an introverted and shy person at heart, I'm going out of my comfort zone to put myself in social situations.

But I keep trying.

I joined weight watchers 3 weeks ago and have found them to be really friendly.

I'm wanting to get into playing music again, so I went to one show and one open mic this week. I felt pretty uncomfortable and didn't talk to anyone at the open mic, but I'm glad I went anyway.

I would say, go after things that really matter to you to socialize. Friendship is a gift, sometimes it just isn't in the cards or takes time to develop---but if you are at an event that you have a special interest in, i.e. your faith, sport, arts... at least you'll always have that.

Best of luck!