Need support

[aubs_1001]

Just today I had to give tough love to my childhood bestfriend because she decided to snort cocaine last night. I was worried all night about her because she dropped this bomb out of nowhere and then went off grid. I had to unblock my ex, who is there with her because they are still friends, to make sure everything was alright and that he could get her home. I fear that by me voicing my feelings today to her, I just lost her. My depression and anxiety have never been so aggressive in my life as they are right now. I’m alone and hurting. Just trying my hardest not to break

[explorerPHX]

well, you have come to the right place. you are no longer alone. i can't imagine what you are going through. what you did, it shows that you care so much about your childhood bestfriend. i hope that she sees it that way.

[aubs_1001 in reply to explorerPHX]

thankyou so much, this means alot

[explorerPHX in reply to aubs_1001]

you are welcome. glad i could be here for you. it takes a lot of courage to do what you did... to speak up, knowing what might happen. but, like i said, it shows just how much you care about your childhood bestfriend.

[aubs_1001 in reply to explorerPHX]

I hope she takes it that way. I’m just at a loss right now, everything that I say to her she shoots down and turns it back around on me. I just wish she would understand you can’t play with things like this, it’s way dangerous

[explorerPHX in reply to aubs_1001]

i hope she takes it that way too. i agree, you really can't play with things like that, way too dangerous. hopefully she'll get through it with the support of a bestfriend like you. speaking of which, what can we do to help you get through it? you're hurting, trying not to break, what can we do to help you?

[aubs_1001 in reply to explorerPHX]

I hope she will let me help her. Honestly I have no clue, I have been feeling my depression and anxiety creep up on me these past couple of weeks but I’ve been pushing back. It just seems to have gotten to be harder to not let myself get completely sucked into this void. & today I can literally feel myself like slipping into this like dark depression, and I’ve just put in all of this hard work to crawl my way out of that darkness. I just don’t know what to do

[explorerPHX in reply to aubs_1001]

i hope she will let you help her too.

i understand what you are talking about. you're under attack, slipping into darkness and you just don't know how to stop it. and, on top of all that, you've put in the effort and the work to crawl out of that darkness, only to feel yourself slipping back. it's a helpless feeling i know.

[aubs_1001 in reply to explorerPHX]

How did you get out of it? I just don’t know what to do. Because if I’m being honest, I want to just let go

[explorerPHX in reply to aubs_1001]

i still struggle with it - putting in the effort to claw my way out of the darkness, only to slip back in. i even struggle with wanting to just let go. for me, i am working on trying to recognize the small victories, the little positive achievements. i guess trying to focus on the crawling out as opposed to the slipping back in. i wish i had a magic answer for you aubs_1001. i've been there, hurting & alone, not knowing what to do ... and it's not a good place to be i know.

[aubs_1001 in reply to explorerPHX]

It’s nice to know that I’m not the only one who is feeling this way. Maybe one day we won’t?

[explorerPHX in reply to aubs_1001]

trust me, you are not the only one who is feeling this way. i hope one day neither of us will.

[aubs_1001 in reply to explorerPHX]

Thankyou for this, you helped me to just take a breather. You are awesome

[explorerPHX in reply to aubs_1001]

you're welcome. glad i could be of some help. you are pretty awesome too aubs_1001.

[fauxartist]

unless she has a daily habit of coke.....I wouldn't be to overly worried yet.....there are so called recreational users that are not addicted and use on the odd occasion. I don't condone it as it was my drug of choice when I was out in the world back in the late 70's, and it's the devil for sure. I had a very difficult time kicking all of it , but that's because I'm dual diagnosed. I have addiction and depression....but people who are not pre-disposed to addiction should still be very cautious with these kinds of drugs, meth, crack, all of it is highly addictive. So as to not push her away, try not to be too judgemental or preachy....just ask her what's going on in her life, and let her know you are only concerned for her.