Feeling down

[purl1]

It's been a little while since I've been on here. haven't been feeling too bad. well that has changed. I called a place where I used to work to see if they had room for me and they don't so now I'm feeling pretty depressed. I'm scared to go back to work, but I feel like I need to go back. I don't know if I'm actually ready to start working again. I'm still dealing with med changes which has been difficult because my psychiatrist is out on maternity leave and won't be back until mid May. we have been communicating oveer the phone, but meds as we all know take time to get into your system. I hate the way that I feel right now. Just kind of out of it. I nneed to do something and I don't have anything to do. I don't do anything around the house because I have no interest anymore. I went out to the store and I can't believe how uninterested I am with just shopping. I can't stand being like this anymore. I feel better than I did two months ago, but I feel like I'm on the edge all the time. I want to cry but I can't. it must be the meds. It has to be the risperidone. making me into an emotionless zombie. always in a fog. mornings are still the worst part of the day for me. I don't know how I would be able to get out of bed early enough to go to work. I don't know what I'm going to do. I feel lost.

[CaptiveYetFree]

So sorry for how you're feeling. I do understand because I have felt the same. I am working and since I have started a year ago I have had a few episodes whereby it caused conflict with bosses and coworkers. They know somewhat of my condition and work with me whereby I can work to the best of my ability. Some days are really hard to get through while others not so bad. I to have had to adjust to medication chances. I pray that you will find the resources that will help you.

[Hidden]

If you can afford it, perhaps you could look for some voluntary work. Maybe related to your field of work or maybe something that could give you a related skill. It might help you ease yourself back into work. Wishing you all the best.