Losing Streak

[Nerdo243]

Woke up this morning to my alarm clock, instantly throwing my hand on my head, breathing heavily wanting to scream and cry. Constantly debating on if i can handle 8 hours of work at a place that doesn't enjoy my presence. I've been getting much worse over the past 4 weeks, going to work less and less. Last week I was only at work for 4 hours . I called in for today and I'm going to be woken up in a few hours with my mother screaming at me and I just cant handle it. The guilt and heavy feelings of worthlessness never subside.

[Kat63]

Is there any possibility you could find a new job? That can make a huge difference.

[Nerdo243 in reply to Kat63]

unfortunately theres a forming pattern where when i do change environments like a new job ill be just fine for months, but then i slowly decline more and more back to just missing days. So i think even if i found a new workplace it would end up being the same

[Kat63 in reply to Nerdo243]

OK, you see a pattern here.

Do you have access to a therapist? If not - what can you do with this realization? This is important - you’ve figured something out. Now let’s see what you can do with it.

[Hidden]

wow..i remember those moments..yeah, time to consider another job, or , find s way to make it enjoyable with work..ill look for anither one..

[emetophobicgirl]

I have to agree, maybe a new place, new faces and an understanding environment would make the world of difference for you. With these things it is important to put yourself first as its only yourself that is suffering through all of this