My gf cheated on me. We were too close to each other and now we don't talk anymore. She becomes too mean to me, she said so many bad things and I still heard everything bcuz I thought there was a chance to get her back. But she's happy with her new bf and even bragging about many things to make me feel so bad. Lately am having anxiety issues and cry all the time. I was emotionally very strong, she came to my life and I lost all of my friends. I just have few of them left. And now I am all alone. Crying over and over again and there she is enjoying and roaming daily with him. Idk how I became so emotionally weak. I feel like puking all the time. When all of her Friends ignored her and left her to cry,I was there for her. She just forgot everything and had a new bf. My heart beats are damn fast. I can't sleep, idk what to do. Please help. Idk what to do. Am depressed.
Anxiety attacks and depression due to... - Anxiety and Depre...
Anxiety and Depression Support
I never been in that situation so I can’t offer help. I just wanted to say hang in there. These feelings will pass. I remember when my dog died I was upset. Things eventually start to get better. Just give it some time.
I am so sorry for your dog. I Know how it feels to loose someone who you love the most, to whom you are habitual to. And thanks for your precious words and time, it means a lot to me.
I’m so sorry. That is so painful!
Sadly, you’re mentally beating yourself up because you were there for her. I’m sorry you have to hear about her new bf. is there someway you don’t have to hear about the new person?
Love hurts, it can be painful and you’re not the only person who has gone through so much pain.
Have your time to cry. Give yourself a date and tell yourself a day that you’re done thinking about her cuz you need to get on with your life. My son got divorced but he couldn’t let her go although she cheated on him. I told him while you’re over here hanging onto Mrs Wrong, Mrs Right is a few steps over here waiting for you. Finally he said that’s it and he initiated the divorce. Best thing ever!! You need to grieve, of course but it’s not good for you to be ill. Get on with your life as soon as you can. You deserve someone special who will love you. All the best, Dee
So sorry to hear about your son's divorce, i know that after this whole thing will be over i will be fine. Just am afraid to sleep thinking that she's having fun and am crying for her. And I blocked her out of my life, hope everything get back to normal. But thanks for supporting me and sharing your experience, It helped me a lot.
Breakups are always the worst. But eventually you have to see the harm she has done to you. Acknowledge that what she did was wrong and not fair. Its ok to be angry. Dont feed your anger with negativity and violence, but with positivity. Prove to yourself that you are the better person by moving on and being a much more caring and loving person. Be resilient and fight through your emotions. Its very tough to get through, but you have a whole community here to help
Yes every thing in life happens for a reason, many people come and go, but instead of living in past, we have to learn from the mistakes and experiences. I have helped a lot of people to get out of depression, but this time am unable to understand my own words. May be after a year or so, i will laugh at myself for crying for such a girl. And really i didn't thought that so many people will reply to my post, it made me feel good, just thanks for your precious time and motivating me. Am so glad that a bunch of strangers without even knowing me are trying to help me out.
Unfortunately, a broken heart takes time to heal. Don’t position yourself to see her with her new bf or anything about her. Let go and work on yourself! Don’t worry about what she’s doing. She’s in the past and we don’t worry about the past, right? We move forward and doing that will help you so much. The lingering pain and depressive feelings are normal with a break up and if you stay away from her, they will dissipate with time. It’s time to work on improving yourself right now so you will be ready when the next lovely lady enters your life! Wishing you peace of mind 🌷🙂🌷
Now am so scared of relationship and stuff that i don't want to be in one. but Thanks for motivation and such a good words, It means a lot to me.
Don’t be scared! This is all a part of life. More than likely, your next relationship will not be like the one you’re getting out of. Life gets better with age...remember that! This is a part of your life experiences, your journey. Learn from the heartache...it may help you to see in the future when you’re in the same type of relationship and you will know to back off...no heartache this time! Learn from it! Don’t be afraid...you’re strong and knowledgeable! 😎🌷😎
Yes, but won't I start comparing the new girl with her?
No, because you’re going to let go of her and will have moved on and worked on yourself first! You’ve got this Redfox! Go ahead and feel sad for her, then move on, Redfox! You can do it!
I really have to spend time on me, am just 20 and i have my parents who sacrificed a lot for me. And what am doing is wasting time on a person who don't care for me.
I just need to phase out this thing. but whatever i say, Its too hard and am trying my best.
Keep working on it and you will find your peace! Attempting to work on it is a good thing! If you really put your mind to it, you’ll be pleasantly surprised at how quickly you can move on!
These things happen- just don't take her back if she tries to come crawling to you.
If i am able to move on and forget her, there's no going back.
Personally, I think 20 is way too young to get serious with a relationship. Whether you are in college or exploring a career, enjoy your life.
this reply made me think a lot. Actually 20 is too young to concentrate on stuff like this, i should be doing something productive, and am trying a lot. And actually being on this site helped me a lot, people are so generous here. All are ready to help, thanks. I am trying my best to forget her.
I am trying, but am unable to distract my mind. thinking of her with someone else make me anxious.
I wouldn't waste one more iota of energy on her. I hope you have family and friends to help you through this, and try to do something that you enjoy. If you are still in school, perhaps you can see a counselor, and if not I hope you find one if needed to get you through the hump.
Hi there! I have been in your shoes and cheating is the ABSOLUTE worst thing you can do to a partner. I am sorry you are in so much pain right now. The only thing that I can tell you that time does heal your wonds. Try to do things to make yourself feel good. Who cares about them and what they are doing. Karma will get them in the end and by then you will be in a better place. Distnace yourself from her and focus on the more important person YOU. I know and I understand the pain that you feel. I am still dealing from pain when my ex cheated on me. we have been seperated 2 years in July. I have to tell you that I am in a much better place mentally than I was in before. I hope this helps you. If you need to chat Im happy to listen. Take care!!
Sorry to hear about your breakup. But 2 years and you are still dealing the pain? I don't want it. I want to be in pain for long. I am scared by this.
It's just I am still hoping that everything will be fine. I don't want to think like that. Now my mind is thinking about the good times rather then remembering all the suffering i have gone through. IDK why am still hoping for everything to turn out in my way.
and thanks for help, also it will be good to chat with you.
You're welcome! I did the same thing focus on what was so good in our relationship but it was only lying to me. I needed to remind myself why my relationship with him was toxic and NO one deserves to be lied and cheated on. Now my story is more complicated because the other woman is truly a nut case and she enjoyed seeing me hurt. Still tried rubbing it in my face two years later that they are married. Guess what I don't care. Do not let anyone steal you joy. Hugs ❤🙃
Cheating is deceiving- Personally I think people who cheat, and lie whether it is at work, relationships, business , politics etc. have character flaws, and have an empty place inside so they take advantage of others. Maybe you can volunteer at an animal shelter if you have time- animals rock!
I have been in few social services. I want to volunteer at animal shelter, old age home, orphanage. I want distraction. I can't keep my mind out of her, but there's a little improvement. I hope everything will be fine,my exams are going on , i have major projects review. Many things are there, it's just i can't get time for myself.
What are you studying? Volunteering is great even if it's just a little bit.
I am in final year of my college, and am doing Computer Science Engineering, Actually everything is far from my college, so am thinking of listening to other people problems here on this site and try to help them.
Wow, that is quite an accomplishment with that major. Are U in the USA? Don't worry about helping other people- as a focus- but I would just feel free to vent. You can also call warm lines, crisis lines or go to a counselor at your college if you need to- there you go.
No am not From US, am from India. I visited this site for that only,and i think i am improving, when i posted my problem here, i was on verge of a very bad depression. Now i am feeling better, i took dinner after very long time, I started watching something on netflix and youtube. I don't know if i should go to counselor.
You're in India- wow. I hear you are from a very beautiful and intriguing country! You sound extremely bright and inciteful as well as kind. Isn't this interesting being able to communicate ( I am in the USA) with someone who is so far away. I attended college millions of years ago( ha) so I remember some of the pressure as well as good times as well. I know people who have been to India and were very impressed. Welcome to the site.
Thanks, India is beautiful place you must visit here, people are of friendly and helpful nature. There's lot of place to visit here, if anytime you're coming inform me i will tell you all the places to visit.
You seems very experienced, and that's what am here for, to learn from this situation, may be i am feeling very bad today, but this experienced will help me lot in future.
And due to friendly nature of all people here, it feels like home here. Chatting like this only make me forget few things for a while.
Hi there. I am so sorry you are going through this. I'm currently dealing with the same thing. I have been seeing someone on and off for the past 2 years, and he started dating someone else while we were working on things, and he lied to me about it for a month. It's been a month since this has happened, and I am still not working, hanging out with my friends, or doing anything other than watch tv. I cry at least 5 times a day, have a pit in my stomach 24/7, and can't seem to think about anything other than her with him. I know you are looking for answers, and I don't have them unfortunately, but I at least hope this helps you to know that you are by no means alone in struggling so badly to get over a broken relationship. You are not emotionally weak-- you are in pain, and pain is overwhelmingly difficult to deal with. Just take it one day at a time, even one hour at a time if you have to. Try not to worry about still feeling this way in a month or a year, just focus on being in the present and doing little things like counting your breaths when you find yourself unable to think about anything else.
you actually summarize everything happened to me, i haven't taken proper meal since a long time. Many times i forget to eat. there are no exact answer to this, but to share problem make me feel good. I really hope you find peace and forget that person who hurt you, i have exact same thing going on like you. Just remember that there are lot of people who care about you, if you want you can share everything with me or anyone here, it will make you feel good. And anytime you feel alone or depressed just ping me, i will also feel good to help, and as i exactly know what you are going through.
I don’t know how old you are, which can make a big difference in these matters. Are you crying cause you just love her so much? If so you need to look at “love” and see if that’s how she treats you! Or are you crying because you feel stupid? If that’s it, hey it happens to the best of us. Go ahead and cry till Sunday. The pull your self together, perhaps go to church? Get out of your room . Get some exercise. Look for a hobby to take up. Anything but wasting your time crying over someone who does not want to be with you. You’ll get over it. I promise
Am just 20, and am crying because of both reason mentioned. I loved her so much, and too am feeling damn stupid.
I think it's a great idea to go and spend time with your family. It will help with the healing. If these feelings went away straightaway I think that would not make sense as surely your relationship had deep meaning for you but to spend time with those who can give you a feeling of security and warmth is a great idea .
Just enjoy being looked after for a while. Gemma x
I have already gone to my home twice, and thinking of going again. my home is very far from my place. I have exams and some projects reviews, when those will end i will go to home. and also i don't want to tell my family anything, they will start worrying unnecessarily.
Exactly you are only 20, and part of it is ego. Studies are now being done which indicate that our brains do not fully develop ( executive functions) until at least 25-30 in a lot of people.( I took some webinars about this. You have a whole future ( and present of course) . Now, get off the computor and/or your device and experience nature.
Hi sorry your going through that . A broken heart is painful , been their ..many times . My exhubby was a cheater . I finally let him go after 3xs cheated on me !! It hurt I won't lie . Thought I never love again . Not true . Took time n alot of letting go n yes thinking why? What ? Blamed myself alot . He took my self esteem from me .
No !! I did nothing wrong !! It was his self esteem he had issues with .
Well after years n years ..I don't feel anything for him !!
Didn't take long to get myself back ,just patience n good friends !!
Yes it's hard . Thanks ,but it's ok we been aparts years !! He killed the love . As time passed ,I found that out . My heart started to heal .
Hey my ex was unblieveable unkind with his gfs, he was seen by my family n my kids , (his kids), friends saw him . Hurt my kids badly n that hurt me !!
Yes I thought of all the good times we had together as a family . Nite Mares lol but I think it's was the healing process .
Then I asked myself . Do I wanna be with someone who is with someone else ? Lies lies lies ,walking floors waiting for him !!
So anger set in ,yes hate !! I don't wanna live like that ..wondering !! So I put a end to it !!
It had been really tough time for you, and am happy you moved on. Am trying, it's morning here, and i dreamt of her(it was nightmare), it was the worst thing for morning, rather then relaxed and calm you are waking up with anxiety, shivering, heartbeat very fast. Morning is ruined, hope the remaining day is good.
Yeah, change is hard. Relationship changes cut so deep, often bringing anxiety with it.
Fairly recently I got a new boss that was an unbearable monster, the job I loved turned into torture. Trouble sleeping (for me, I was waking up at wrong times), and that pukey feeling as I drove in to work. I read a book on anxiety, and learned some good tactics to aid my sleep and anxiety. In the meantime, the Lord was working to change my circumstances--got fired, severance $ & new job that I like. Who can say where circumstance will take you, but the cliched adage that time heals all wounds is totally in play hear.
The hard part is how you get through "the meantime". My go to has always been taking walks outside and scripture. I was surprised and comforted when I found that David experienced anxious thoughts and wrote about it in Psalms.