Hate my appearance

[cinnamonapple89]

I can’t seem to get a grip on my appearance. Everything is ugly to me right now about me. Like I repulse myself. I know I’m not actually that ugly but when I look in the mirror that’s what I see. My hair is falling out, my skin is changing textures. It’s just very hard to see myself age (I’m 30, but even seeing the difference from 20-30 has freaked me out). How can I get some self esteem about myself because I’m struggling

[Hidden]

Everyone ages and everyone struggles with perception issues. I think we all sometimes look in the mirror and see absolute hell because the reality is, opposed to what advertising will tell us, we aren't free from blemish. I've looked in the mirror and hated what I saw, too. This especially when I'd wake up from a hard core drinking bender (don't drink anymore) lacking sleep. As I took care of myself and appreciated what makes me "me", from the inside-out, I know there are some beautiful things. I must say, I'm no Brad Pitt, but who cares.

Aging can be difficult as we transition into our new selves, but it's natural...it's what nature dictates. Things stop working as well, our skin is less elastic as collagen is lost...so we wrinkle, and it's just the unfortunate way we go. I have seen beautiful people anywhere from 30-60 years-old (and I'm sure older) who probably have the same thoughts you do.

What can you do...well, screw the mirror, and declare yourself sexy, beautiful, or whatever word fits. Do not use the word "repulsive". You are not this, your mind is tossing you negative thoughts. Focus on what makes you the most unique from everyone else. There is no one else out there like you and that alone makes you extravagant, special, and a wonderful thing. Again, you're stuck in your mind that's throwing out horrendous comments about yourself and they aren't fair or true. Don't give them value, they are statements that should sink to the bottom of the sea...never to return.

As far as self-esteem...get out there and find things that make you feel beautiful. Get your hair done, hit the gym and start a workout regiment, or whatever you'd like to improve upon. To feel better, you have to stop looking negatively in the mirror. Try something new (maybe a new dress, do your hair different) and see if you get compliments. I find that sometimes people don't always externally acknowledge positive things. For instance, I might think..."Wow, they look great today." Wouldn't it be great to hear that? So, it might take sometime, but really, you are not repulsive. Unique, one-of-a-kind, special....so on? Absolutely.

[cinnamonapple89 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you so much for taking time out to write that

[Hidden]

Imagines with my happy childhood play in front of my eyes. When time passed and I grew up I was more and more unhappy, with physical manifestation of depression and anxiety. Today I'm lost in this life, feeling that I missed somewhere in the road of life my purpose in this life.

[Celtic27]

Hi there sorry this is such a problem for you! I would think the first thing would be to go to your doctor and have a check up and get your blood tested your maybe need medication in the short term then hopefully you will feel better! I wish you well and hope you get better soon! David

[Hidden]

I struggle with this my own self...we have to remind ourselves..pretty is as pretty does.....that's where the beauty comes from...Within Ourselves...feed the positive into your mind...look in the mirror and tell yourself I'm beautiful and I love me...maybe this will help you in some small way! Have a beautiful day. Dump trucks of love, peace, light, joy and hugs!

[hypercat54]

Hi this is life I'm afraid and we all have to go through it. I cope by making jokes like who is that old woman who follows me everywhere? She appears in my mirror and in shop windows but I wish she would leave me alone.

I used to be slim, active and ok I have never had good looks but now I have sagging skin and wrinkles and am overweight. I just try and see them as war wounds and evidence of my ability to survive, then I feel a bit better about myself. x