So tired

[jschwab39]

I’m 39 years old. I’m happily married with 2 beautiful children. My son is 12, has sensory integration disorder, ADHD and autism, but high functioning. My daughter is 5, has sensory integration disorder, is delayed because of difficulties processing language and retaining information. She’s too young to take for the extensive testing my son has undergone. I work full time, as does my husband. I’ve struggled with depression since I was 16. Though it’s improved, it never really goes away. I have to keep at it. But it’s just so overwhelming these passed couple of months. My daughter is screaming and getting physical instead of trying to use her words. We suspect that a lot of it is due to our son claiming more of our attention bc of his issues. I take him to therapy every Saturday, we do therapy homework every night. It’s a constant battle with him on every front. But I sit with her every night doing homework and now I have therapy homework with her, too. I feel like I’m going to collapse or explode. I’m exhausted. I feel like I’m not doing enough for them and like I’m doing so much but nothing works. Sometimes I just wanna escape and read a book, and I feel guilty for that. Sorry, I just had to vent.

[Dolphin80]

Oh I’m so sorry. Be gentle with yourself. I am 38 with a six month old and very tired too. I’ve been struggling with depression anxiety since age 12. It’s tough but I know we will be ok. Feel better. I understand the tiredness.

[ChicagoGirl1961]

Don't underestimate what you are accomplishing. You sound like an amazing mother and a very special person. Hang in there, hope things get better for you. You are incredible mother!

[jschwab39 in reply to ChicagoGirl1961]

Thank u so much.😊

[ChicagoGirl1961 in reply to jschwab39]

Years from now when your children are grown and you see how well they turned out largely because of the effort you put in to raising them will bring you immense satisfaction. Your efforts are not in vain and your children will remember and someday thank you. Good luck to you and be well.

[jschwab39 in reply to ChicagoGirl1961]

Thanks so much for your kind words.

[Hidden]

Your doing lots and you have a lot on, I'm not surprised your tired

[Chappy12]

Hi know excatly how you feel....I haven't slept properly for years .my daughter has autism and tourettes

Gave my job up two yrs ago for a bit of respite..she is nearly 18 and like you I'm exhausted 😢I am constant vigil day/night as she is so active and impulsive.ive coped well when I think about it having PTSD due to two of my sons dying..I suffer with high levels of anxiety anyway.not nice..sending hugs ..were doing the best we can 💕💕

[jschwab39 in reply to Chappy12]

U sound like an amazing mom. Hang in there.

[Chappy12 in reply to jschwab39]

Just need more sleep sometimes I'm functioning on 3 hrs...since she was 12/13..hormones aggregate their condition especially girls 💕I feel like a shit mum sometimes especially after hardly no sleep and I've promised to take her out 😢like today..feel all fuzzy xx

[jschwab39 in reply to Chappy12]

That’s what I get per night-3 or 4 hours sleep. I hear ya. I don’t think the guilt ever really goes away. I feel guilty all the time.