Destroyed

[vanessi]

I hesitated to post here again cos I feel I cannot with my life anymore. It doesn't matter how long has been since I posted for the first time. This is never gonna change. I don't wanna live anymore. I feel so much pain inside of me. I feel like trash, I feel the biggest loser and my life doesn't have any sense, I don't see the light at the end of the tunnel, nor a good future for me. It is not true when people say time cures everything. It doesn't

I need so much support and I don't know where to get it from

[pink83737]

Hey I’m really sorry your feeling this way and it’s definitely not a good feeling whatsoever and I’ve been in the same position you were in. I didn’t want to live and I was suicidal. But it got better surprisingly when I never thought it would. Please stick around, this world needs you. There is light at the end of the tunnel I promise! Time doesn’t cure everything but it helps sometimes. I’m always here if you need a friend or someone to talk to♥️

[vanessi in reply to pink83737]

Thanks for your support. I wish I was not so weak. I haven't seen the light at the end of the tunnel for a year and an half. I never gonna recover not matter how much I tried. I don't know where to go, what to do to feel better. Nothing makes me happy, everything I do reminds me how miserable I am and I feel. I just try to sleep all day so I cannot feel pain

[pink83737 in reply to vanessi]

You aren’t weak, once you come out of this darkness you will be so much stronger! You will recover you just need to be more positive, you can’t keep bringing yourself down. surround yourself with positivity and i sleep a lot too, but it won’t do you any good. hang in there love, i promise you will get out of this darkness, storms don’t last forever.

[vanessi in reply to pink83737]

My mom says all the time I need to never positive but everything has been negative in my life since I was 17. Almost ten years ago. I wonder why. What have I made wrong why I cannot feel ok with myself. I see the days passing, I'm unemployed, stuck in a place where I don't want to be, with debts, no friends, no support. The man I loved dumped me for no reason and I don't know who I am. I can't do any of the activities I used to do because remind me sad things. I don't enjoy them.

You have no idea how many times I've prayed if there is a God, just one opportunity, how many times I have asked to life just one chance.

I barely eat, I don't smile, I don't want to talk to people, don't want to see ppl either. Not even a simple thing like watch the tv. I'm lost

[pink83737 in reply to vanessi]

Well if you want to be my friend I’d be glad ! There is a God out there, he’s real, he’s healed me. The only way to get better is to have a positive mindset with everything though. You can PM me if you’d like

[blueraku in reply to vanessi]

I relate a lot.

[Marshall64]

Don't give up hope. You are young and there are so many different possibilities that are ahead of you. You can't see them all now and that is what makes life interesting. You may meet people in your life in the near future that can change everything for you. You are not a loser. You may have had unfortunate circumstances in your life or people that were in your life that weren't the best for you. Don't let that define you.

Hang in there....

[vanessi in reply to Marshall64]

It doesn't define me but, who am I gonna meet? All the people I have met in my life have destroyed me completely, except my mother and sister. I don't have hopes, faith, dreams, aspirations. Everything is gone. I don't have any future. I'm never gonna be the same one I used to be. I'm sorry. I feel so physically and mentally weak. I'm tired

[LadyO4]

Perhaps these articles will offer you some support and understanding why you suffer so severely. bit.ly/2mFxWoz

Depression is a huge topic but it is also something that can be fixed with the right kind of treatment from a functional doctor, who will test your hormones, check you brain, and offer methods to reverse the debilitating feelings that spiral you downwards. Please believe your life can change - mine did, so I am speaking from experience. You do not have to remain in a pit of despair.

Would you ever consider talking with a Christian counselor? You can call around to some Bible believing churches and have your list of questions ready. You'll want to gather information about the best qualified person who is willing to take the time to listen to what you have to say. You don't need to make a decision right away, but by finding out what kind of help is available will give you something to think about. If you'd like any help figuring that out, let me know.

One thing is certain, you must not carry this burden by yourself. Lean on others to carry you through your darkest moments. You will be glad you did.

[vanessi in reply to LadyO4]

But I'm carrying by myself cos I have no one. I can't get support from anyone. I feel so alone and empty. At the moment I have no money to see a doctor. I'm unemployed, with debts, stuck in a place where I don't want to be, no friends, the man I loved dumped me. I lost the trust and the faith in me, I feel like trash, my self-esteem is so down is on the floor.

I lost the belief of everything. It seems no one can help me

[LadyO4 in reply to vanessi]

Thank you for giving me more details about your current situation - I have a better understanding of why you are struggling.

I commend you for reaching out on this website and making such an effort to connect with others. I think when loneliness sets in, it just compounds the problems and makes it seem like no one cares. There are such good people in this world and sometimes the ones that can offer the best support are the ones who have lived though an emotional crisis like you are.

I know from my own past experience and from what I have studied over the years, it's possible from what you describe that you may be suffering from a chemical imbalance which is affecting your moods and depression. When certain hormones aren't made in your body and you have a deficiencies, it results in feeling so low and hopeless like you said. This article will give you some ways where you can help boost these hormone levels. bit.ly/2T5BZvG

By implementing these specific things into your life, you can begin to have a sense of control over yourself. These are not just good ideas, they are proven methods to make a person feel better. Depression can be lessened when a person eats the right kinds of foods and eliminates the hormone disruptors found in processed and junk food. Please be good to yourself and decide you want to give them a try. You will be glad you did.