Authority anxiety

[maggief9812]

Today I emailed my program advisor to ask for some advise on how to manage a difficult patient and for some practical strategies to improve my time management while still providing high quality care. It was a necessary email, and I believe it was well written and well thought out. Her response to me was short, to the point, and forwarded by her to the program director. The director’s response was to the point. Now I am meeting with them both tomorrow after clinic and I am imagining all the worst possible outcomes.

I’m rationally aware that they are both older women who prefer in person communication and that from a professional standpoint it’s better to discuss patient care face to face. The emotional aspect of me that was abused by authority figures in my youth wants to vomit. It does NOT feel safe to put myself out there and I am regretting calling attention to myself by asking for help.

Does anyone have any strategies for calming down when rational self-talk is not enough to quiet the voice of impending doom?

[HisAngel]

Well, you've asked for help and identified that they probably want to discuss in person not because of you personally but because that is their communication style. Go into it with an open mind...peeling back their experience and applying what may work for you ..and your patient. Prepare yourself to not take it personally, but as constructive and helpful. Your initial mindset / selftalk will allow you to go in with a calm, open manner.

[maggief9812]

Thanks, HisAngel. I’m calming, but I still have that pesky knot in my chest. I’m trying to accept that it’s just going to sit there until I get this meeting over with and not let it distract me in the meantime.

[Krn210]

Maggie, I agree with you. With that being said, I would remind yourself that it is ok to ask for help. This is just a strategizing meeting, no harm in that. Lastly, I find that some lavender oil on my wrists helps. As well as focusing on my breathing. Things will go well!

[AZ1970]

They probably want to support you. I understand that fear all too well. Please keep us updated.

[maggief9812 in reply to AZ1970]

Clinic starts soon, after that I will meet to discuss. Hyper focused right now on wanting to perform at my best ability today- like always- but putting a lot of pressure on myself right now. Not feeling calm.