Really scared and nervous

[SueSue13]

I have been attending group therapy for 6 weeks and I am being discharged today. I do not feel I am. However, the therapist feels I am. I do have friends and family that make up my support team. Unfortunately, I feel like I am a burden to them most of the time so it is hard for me to reach out to them. I am really scared and nervous about being discharged today. My fear is that I will end up we’re I was before which was having a suicide plan. I still have suicidal thoughts, just not everyday. The last time was a couple of days ago. Can anyone relate?

[Hidden]

Yes can relate to the short time allocated for group therapy. Feeling a burden is a problem

but you have to let off steam somewhere . There is a new iniative in England with support clubs for folk with mental health problems where the GP can prescribe referral to a club where there are different activities such as gardening, walking, and art classes. I found I could join knitting clubs and art classes, where was able to make friends and enjoyed something different. There is a gap between NHS and the real world as there are millions of people who have these symptoms for many reasons. There is still a divide between we and them when we are all the same. Wouldn't you be abnormal if you could not experience any emotion if something unfortunate happened in your life - your pet dies - someone is ill an going down hill ?

[SueSue13 in reply to Hidden]

My family and friends just don’t understand. They are trying, but they don’t. I have met people I talk to from group, but they are also dealing with their own stuff. I feel like I put too much on them sometimes. It becomes overwhelming and I can’t deal with it. Mental Health is just not looked at like any other disease and people think you can just get over it. I have dealt with it for so long and hid it for a long time. Now it is out and I am worse than I have ever been. I don’t know if I can do this without going to group therapy.

[Hidden in reply to SueSue13]

That's where it helps to gain support on this site - some people have down days and are desperate. If you are on medication sometimes it takes time to help.

Are these feelings of depression linked to your relationships - have you broken off a relationship and feel out of your depth? Are you having problems at work? Are you on medication? You now feel vulnerable as you have been open with your problem - it's hard to talk about close relationships with your immediate friends and family - so this is the right place to chat - just a line from someone will show you are not alone.

[SueSue13 in reply to Hidden]

I have not broken off any relationships, I am on medication. My feelings are about going back to work, the change in my schedule. I was able to talk to the group about what was going on with me, about my past, my PTSD, my depression, my suicidal thoughts, etc. There is only 1 friend at work that knows why I have been off. All everyone else knows is it is just medical. So, it will be a big change from being able to talk about it during the day to not being able to talk about it at work. I also have panic attacks almost everyday now, I am concerned they will get worse retuning to work.

[Hidden in reply to SueSue13]

As you may have repetitive thoughts which may trigger off the panic attacks it must be difficult to take your mind off the past. The PTSD is very difficult to adjust to. Again the more you go back, it can decrease your ability to function and may delay your progress. When you get a panic attack, does it affect your breathing? Panic attacks are very difficult to cope with - they may be helped with breathing exercises, breathing in and then breathing out slowly. If you feel breathless - then it can be helped by putting a paper bag over your head if you hyperventilate.

In the famine of bags in shops it would be rare to find a paper bag of the right size !

Do you think you could have a hair appointment, or a neck and shoulder massage,

or even facial, to help relaxation. It does help pampering yourself.

Other methods of cognitive behaviour therapy, and EMDR can help intense anxiety.

A doctor might prescribe a beta blocker if your symptoms affect your heart beat, as this can help the anxiety. To help yourself go back to work, you could try to visit your library museum or art gallery, to see if you feel anxious with other people around you. I was recommended to take a Valium when ever I needed one to quell anxiety especially if situations were stressful Valium works within a quarter of an hour and is not addictive. A sleeping pill at night might help as well. I never realised I had a stress disorder, which affects every part of your body and your para sympathetic system giving you the trembles, and shakes and panic attacks.

Long term stress can lead to increase stress hormones which react by making you eat comfort foods. These sweet foods give an immediate burst of energy but Lucozade and very high sugar foods can work on the brain like opioids. The areas of the brain start to work at the same level as if you have had taken cocaine.

Amending your diet to cut down on certain over processed food, and eat healthily

may help your nerves.

If you can find a way of relaxing such as going to a gym to do a work out, or go swimming - then may be this will help relieve stress.

Some areas to yoga which is very good for your nervous system and your

hormone levels and muscles.

If these panic attacks get too frequent, and you have insomnia, then if you take a sleeping pill, make sure you shut down your computer at least an hour before you go to sleep. Cut down the lighting in your bedroom, and go to bed as late as you can, so you should get at least 6 hours sleep. x Have been through all this and know what hell you are going through. If you were just to ask one of your family if you could go on an outing to a NT house, and café - it could be a tonic. You may not be able to talk to your family, but by going out with them, you are helping yourself back to your old life before you had such problems.

[Hidden]

Hello Sue

Treatment for our conditions, Groups after time expect the Patient to begin to control their fears, they must feel confident you have arrived at the end of this pathway.

We all feel the same way when we are let out on our own. All I can do is look for diversions to help you take your mind of problems I garden, read books and look at picture books where I have been. We are feeding the birds and we also watch them. We get a nice variety to watch also woodpeckers, although most are various types of sparrows and tits. Keeps us occupied.

Have you anything to divert your negativity, it does work

BOB

[LadyO4]

Hi Sue - it sure is a pleasure to meet you, and I think you did the right thing by connecting with people who really do understand many of your emotions. No one like to feel left alone when facing the giants in our life, and meaningful relationships do help carry us through fearful situations. I've had plenty myself and if it weren't for a few select people, I would not be where I am today.

Hold on tight to hope, and do not let go. It may be the hardest thing you've ever had to do, but believing there is a way where there seems to be no way is more than half the battle. Taking steps to reach a goal can seem daunting but you have heard the phrase "baby steps", so be kind to yourself and try your hardest to not place any unreasonable expectations upon yourself.

I am curious - when was the last time you got checked by a functional doctor and had all your hormones, blood, glands, saliva, and chemical balances checked? This is VERY critical to becoming well again. The brain is involved in everything you are experiencing, so if something is "off", it can be corrected.

A functional doctor knows the exact area of your brain that is firing waves that cause you to feel this way. It can be reversed through therapy.

A functional doctor can determine whether your adrenal glands are stuck in the "ON" position, - meaning that they release unnecessary amounts of cortisol into your bloodstream causing unbearable stress. That can be corrected too.

A functional doctor can tell you if your body is manufacturing the right amounts of serotonin, dopamine, and GABA; hormones that can calm your system and help you feel like a normal person.

I encourage you to check around in your area and make some phone calls, gather information, ask questions, and become familiar with what this kind of doctor can do. I think you will be surprised at how much is out there that can help you. Feel free to write back if you'd like.

[SueSue13 in reply to LadyO4]

I have not had a complete blood work up done in a while. I am going to my doctor in the morning so it is something to discuss with her. I just don’t feel any better. I am just still so sad all the time and no one seems to understand and I am not sure that anyone really even cares. It is so hard to explain why I am so sad when I do not even know exactly why I am so sad. I just don’t what to keep going.

[LadyO4]

You are sad for a reason, and it very well may have to do with your hormones out of balance. It might be that simple. If someone were to come up to you and say, "Sue, if I had something that will make you feel better", would you take them up on their offer?

[SueSue13 in reply to LadyO4]

Yes, if someone had something that could make me feel better I would listen to what they had and discuss it. I struggle so much and then say things to those I care about or isolate. Then they get mad at me. They don’t understand and I struggle to explain it to them. They struggle to understand. It is an endless circle. I think them discharging me from group therapy was not good for me. I am really struggling with it. I can’t do this.

[LadyO4]

I am glad to hear you are open to an idea. I would not offer it if it weren't true.

There are reasons why your body cannot produce enough serotonin, dopamine, and GABA. There are pathways blocked inside your body, beginning with the liver where mch of the manufacturing process begins and eventually travels u to your brain. 70 % of serotonin is made in the gut, so a well balanced diet full of fresh foods is in order for anyone who wants this hormone to do its job.

BE AWARE - No conventional doctor will ever encourage you to eat right because they would much rather sell you their medications. After all, that's what they went to school for - is to match drugs to symptoms. Their goal is NEVER to find the cause of the problem and fix that. That way, they get to keep you a patient while you remain desperate for help. Ask any doctor who left their practice because they could no longer lie to their patients. Once these doctors realize that foods off God's menu for humans makes a person well, they expose the deceptions behind the drug industry that lies to people.

A functional doctor specializing in Endocrinology will target the root cause of your problems by doing tests that will reveal what each of your gland and organs are doing, including your brain. The brain is involved in everything that happens in the body, so you can't ignore the brain.

Getting your hormones balanced will help you. You may have a niacing deficiency which leads a person to depression. Try eating Niacin rich foods or taking a supplement. Same with magnesium, Try reading up on these two nutrients and why they are closely connected to depression.

Watch out for the amounts of fast foods, processed foods, nitrates, hormone disruptors, GMOs. pesticides, preservatives, colorants, dyes, alcohol, caffeine, and chemicals you are daily putting into your body. They don't belong there. They are making you sick, and sad, and depressed. Exercise produces serotonin and will make you feel better. Try it and prove to yourself it really works.

This is just the tip of the iceberg - you would be amazed to know how the body wants to take care of itself, but the SAD (Standard American Diet) won't let it. Watch what you eat. Keep a record of everything you put in your mouth.

Call a functional doctor and ask to set up a consultation for depression. He/she will help you.

[SueSue13 in reply to LadyO4]

Thank you for all of the insight. I already have an endocrinologist that I see because I have Graves’ disease. I will definitely talk to her the next time I see her about all of this.

I can’t shake the feeling that I want to die. I can’t shake the belief that everyone would be better off if I were dead. I just don’t see the point in me being alive. I feel I am a burden to everyone and do nothing but cause pain to everyone.

[LadyO4]

There are two different kinds of endocrinologists - the ones that are trained in western medicine and use medicine only and sound like the one you will see.

The other kind is a functional endocrinologist. NO COMPARISON at all!!!!

I encourage you to do some research and find out precisely why a functional doctor is better for you.

You don't really want to die - you want to feel better and have come to the end of your rope. Consider these new options - you will get to know your body better and discover how wonderfully made you are!!!

[SueSue13 in reply to LadyO4]

Thank you. I will look into this for sure. I appreciate all the input.

[Hidden]

I feel like you😢