I don't really know where to start, I'm new here. I have been struggling with intense sad periods, which I am scared to call depressions, but I've never felt the way I do now. Those sad periods always lasted a week at most, but I've been feeling this way for months now, being triggered by a stupid break-up of a two year relationship. A break-up caused by my recurring sadness. I am already seeing a psychologist, but am starting to feel even worse. I can't reach her for a week, because of the holidays but I can feel myself falling deeper into a real depression and I am struggling to eat well, I hardly sleep and my suicidal thoughts are increasing. I've been talking about it a bit with my best friend, but not using any terms such as 'depression' and 'suicidal', just saying things are going even worse. I don't know how to communicate this to my parents and I don't want to start the new year like this. I feel like if I keep trying to do this all alone, I might not be here for long. I am scared of myself, but I don't know what I can do to stop al of this. Can anybody talk to me? Is there anybody with who I can just use all these terms and be completely honest to without worrying about upsetting?