Mommy blues

[Aorli]

Going through a rough patch today. Everything around me reminds me of everything in life I never accomplished. Yes I stay home and raise my daughter and make sure she is well taken care of. Husband works to pay all our bills so I dont have to worry about it. I have no friends to get out and see so it's just my daughter I see all day every day and it's getting to me. Everyone around me is either working or going to school to further themselves and I just feel so alone I dont know what to do to get past this. I feel like such a waste.

[PNIAuthor60]

The thing about our feelings is that they are not always accurate, I've found. Feeling like a waste does not make it so, dear Aorli. While your feelings are understandable and you say you have no friends - what about checking out some community interest groups and making new friends - treat yourself to making a new friend over the holidays, not all our presents need to be wrapped in brightly colored boxes with ribbon and bows.

What other interests do you enjoy? Do you have a hobby? Do you like to cook? Perhaps volunteering would be a good idea and you could share some of your gifts/talents with others who don't yet know how to do those things without your helping them to learn.

Volunteering is a great experience- I have worked in many places and enjoyed meeting new people and learning new things.

I wish you well - start maybe a gratitude journal that helps us to focus on the things we are grateful for - they are all around us - and in fact, gratitude calms our mind and we feel better.

I don't say these things easily, I have lived with chronic pain in my body for over 20 years but I have learned what helps and so I am just passing along what I have learned hoping to help you find a little joy in your day!

[Aorli in reply to PNIAuthor60]

Thank you for your kind words. I think getting out and volunteering would be great. I just need to look around I dont have money to do our community classes but maybe there are places I could volunteer.

[PNIAuthor60 in reply to Aorli]

I don't have money as well for extras as I am on a disability income. But I have learned to ask about the possibility of subsides ( lowered costs) and sometimes even bursaries.

Nourishing our souls can impact us in so many ways.

I will be praying that you find something to delight you!

[loveandlightseeker]

Hi Aorli! Thank you so much for sharing and please know you are not alone in your feelings here. I am a single mother and have sacrificed social life etc. to raise my daughter independently. However, I wouldn’t have it any other way as knowing she has a great childhood is my greatest accomplishment. I hope you’ll give yourself some credit as well knowing that you are doing your best to make sure she is taken care of. Since it’s required of us we forget to give ourselves credit sometimes. So shout out to you for being a good mom! Volunteering is a great suggestion. Also, working on having an exercise routine has helped me personally. I feel like I’m accomplishing something while also bettering myself. Hope that helps!

[Aorli in reply to loveandlightseeker]

Thank you that does help a lot!

[tamka38]

Hey April sorry you’re going through a rough patch today. The Good news is the day is not over yet and since u at home all day u can finds things u enjoy doing. And find new things for your daughter to learn something new everyday and than u not just sitting worrying about everything find a good movie or read a book or write out your thoughts for today. And keeping a journal is a good idea, to start seeing progress so u can celebrate your good days too. Get comfortable being uncomfortable." If you can be comfortable being uncomfortable, you'll be prepared to handle whatever situation comes along in your own life. As you begin to practice looking for the deeper meaning behind life's challenges, you. Good luck am here for u

[Aorli in reply to tamka38]

Thank you very much. I think I just need to focus on the good and stop trying to compare my life to others

[tamka38 in reply to Aorli]

You may think everyone is better than you are, but you are only seeing the image they portray to others. Everyone has their own fears and weaknesses — after all, we're all human. Stop comparing yourself to others, because you'll always come up short. Be Grateful for every second of every day that you get to spend with the people you love. Life is so very precious. Start today am grateful for my family and friends. What are u grateful for ? Is more things to be grateful for if u look around. Than u will see your blessings 🙌🏾💙🦋🌹🌺😘

[puppypower]

I can relate. I have been home for 17 years with my three children who I homeschool. Though I adore my children it is very lonely. I gave up a good job to stay home with them and earn nothing more than a few hugs at the end of the day. For me, sometimes going outside helps me feel less lonely. My boys swear that I have a mountain meter that needs to be refilled every time I am depressed. It helps me to hike . When the boys were young we went to the zoo a few times a month. Find something that brings you joy and let your light shine. To your child you are the most precious person in the world, the opposite of worthless.

[stbernard1]

Gosh, I completely understand rough days when we are home raising our kids! I am sure you are doing the best you know how and thankfully feelings come and go. I would definitely suggest finding a group in your community that you can be apart of or taking a class in something that interests you. Both of these would provide people in similar stages or life or similar interests. I pray you continue to make an impact in your home and that you would soon feel comforted by new friends!

[Hidden]

You don't say how old you're daughter is? If she's very young perhaps join a local support group for mums and kids. You're not alone in feeling like this which is why many more groups are opening up for this very reason. Perhaps this site will help > mumsmeetup.com/