My Mental Health Story: Hello Everyone... - Anxiety and Depre...

Anxiety and Depression Support

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My Mental Health Story

Flameglow profile image

Hello Everyone,

I've been sinking for quite some time. Currently, I'm seeking a way out of this emotional abyss. It has been excruciatingly difficult due to issues with family and from childhood. Additionally, I've found it complicated to know where to begin to describe the complexity of my issues. I often find myself fearful about the future, and I worry about my capabilities as far as becoming a successful individual. I have neurological disabilities, and my doctor would not sign off on my drivers license. Despite this, I'm a part time college student studying for my bachelor's degree in psychology. I worry that this might be a worthless dream, yet, luckily I'm just dumb enough to try anyways. I am not one to give up; however, that does not mean my negative thoughts and concerns never keep me awake at night. I worry about burdening others with my many needs. Most of which are so difficult to put into words. I am isolated, and feel lonely often. It is hard for me to make friends, and sometimes it is hard to connect. It concerns me deeply, I often worry about my own humanity. I'm a mess. Does anyone relate to this?

8 Replies

HI Flameglow,

How wonderful that you are in school and getting a psych degree!

A big welcome to this board :)

I think many here can relate to the way you are feeling and thinking right now.

If you don't mind, I like checking the facts. The anxious/depressed mind likes to create a lot of incorrect "facts". I've had to correct my own made-up "facts" a lot. So here are my questions if you're willing to answer:

What evidence do you have that make you think you are a burden with your needs? How about evidence that pursuing a degree/career in psychology is a worthless dream? Or that you are dumb?

You sound very, very intelligent to me. Like someone who will go on to do great and interesting things with a degree in psychology. And who will not only have the education, but some personal experience with challenging things that can help you connect with and empathize with others in a psych-related career.

As for friends, that is a tough one for so many- you are not alone. Are you willing to talk about this more- are there some specific barriers?

Are you in therapy? Therapy can be so helpful.

Do come here to talk/vent! There are fantastic people here who can offer so much support and encouragement :)

Flameglow profile image
Flameglow in reply to Calm_mama

Calm_mama,

I don't have any evidence that I'm a burden. However, I do know that my family feels helpless to my needs sometimes and I know that affects them. I do not like them feeling upset about it, heck, I have my own issues from fretting over my issues. What a conundrum! Lol

I only fear that my psych dreams could be a worthless dreams when I over analyze my obstacles, and my mental health. It is fairly easy to talk myself into a panic when I'm feeling concerned about what stands in between me and my goals.

I am currently seeking a therapist as these insights into my "anguish" have only recently occurred to me (within the past 3 months).

Thank you for your words of encouragement and reassurance, I appreciate it so much during these challenging times. ❤

Calm_mama profile image
Calm_mama in reply to Flameglow

Hi Flameglow,

Thank you for your response! It is a conundrum isn't it :)

I bet you'll be able to start ignoring these thoughts soon enough, recognizing that they are anxiety-based. And anxiety is full of so many incorrect messages that we can safely ignore! Keep your goals alive and well in there. I see you doing anything you set your mind to- anything at all. Psychology is a fantastic area of study, and one that will open many doors for you. I hope you can feel proud for pursuing this degree! There is no need to focus on having a mental health concern right now as a specific thing to worry about (having issues from fretting over issues as you say). Yes, you're a little tied up in knots right now. Yes you're going to get some help for that. But recognize that mental health issues affect half, yes HALF of US adults at some point in their lifetime. Issues and struggles with how we feel are common, and there's no need to fret over having some blips in our mental health as we go through life. Personally, I think it makes people way more interesting, and way more relatable :) It's all so human!

I'm so glad you will be getting some help from a therapist. A good connection with a therapist you click with can be so wonderful. It can be slow, but it is worth the wait and effort :)

Keep us posted? Wishing you all the best

You have a lot to be proud of! College is hard, yet you are tackling it! You are taking positive steps for your future and that is amazing! You are not alone here. You are now in a group that is supportive and truly understands the demons of mental illness. I am sending you hugs!

I do know what your going through. I feel like I am not functioning at an appropriate speed for my family but also that I am letting everyone down. I isolate myself from other people and my family I basically live in my room. I've been getting help and some has improved. But I still have a long way to go. Keep up the hard work in school that is great.

After some reflection, I took it upon myself and joined the YMCA. I decided the time is now for steps to better cater to my mind, body, and spirit. I am so excited to be taking these steps out of my "comfort zone". I was lacking recreational activities and social interaction in my day to day life. That is hard since humans are social creatures by nature. It is very easy to become depressed without basic social needs. Thank you for the moral support everyone, I feel so much better than I had all year. I'm so relieved.

Flameglow profile image
Flameglow in reply to Flameglow

I will not let my fears hold me back from doing positive things in my life. There are things I can do and I will do them, darn It! 😅

Calm_mama profile image
Calm_mama in reply to Flameglow

Fabulous👍🏻😀 Nothing can stop you Flameglow. You r inspiring ME today🤗

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