Does it make sense if i say I feel nothing ?
Numb: Does it make sense if i say I... - Anxiety and Depre...
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Spirit19
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That’s depression. You’ve got to find your spark again. What did you love as a kid? What would you do if you could do anything?
I loved feeding doughnuts to my dog when momma said not too .... I loved to climb trees and go walking down trails ...
I wish I still loved doing that ...
It's definitely depression. I've been there many times. What makes you happy? What makes you feel more you?
This is going to sound weird but I wish for that a lot. I'm too emotional and high strung. I guess that's why my anxiety is horrible and causes me to not be able to do the things I used to enjoy. So sounds like your on the opposite side of the spectrum where you want the emotion and joy out experiencing life. I would think antidepressants would help you and finding what truly makes you happy and feel again.
I felt better before I was on so many meds at once .... I don’t think I need to be on so many at once
I know what you mean about taking loads of different medications, sometimes I get symptoms that I have no idea where they came from, probably different side effects of different medications most of the time but difficult to pinpoint. I don't think I'd bother with all these meds if I could manage without them, they make me feel numb and empty, a sense of loss even 😔
agreed 100% I used to have so much joy and now im just sadder then ive ever been. Most is because of how sensitive I am.
I wish I could feel nothing
I can’t stand feeling bad everyday of my life ... chest pains from anxiety hard to breathe panic attacks ... etc ...
Is it bad that I don’t know exactly why I’m depressed ....
yes, absolutely, that is depression. Can you go for a walk and find the beauty in nature, take that time to remember feeding donuts to your dog! Talk to your doctor about medication and ways to help. Have you tried YouTube for meditation for depression?
It's really hard to 'bounce back' or 'snap out of it'. you have to find one thing that you enjoy that you can look forward to... exercise is key to releasing the happy hormones!
I’ve been self medicating and I feel like shouldn’t but it’s an addiction for me and it makes me hate myself
I think it absolutely think it makes sense. I got through stages where I feel nothing and then I go through stages where I feel so sad I can’t stop crying even if I tried. And then there are also good days and moments here and there. It sucks but it’s part of the cycle of depression. It’s not abnormal to feel that way. It is good to talk to someone or seek help when you do. Maybe you need a med adjustment (if you are on any) or maybe you just need to talk it out.
It’s like when I try to talk my mind goes blank and freeze ....
yes....it does honey. I am so happy your reaching out......
I’m just scared of what’s next ...
you are in control right now.....this moment.... and that is all you need to deal with....keep your head focused on what your doing today..... don't worry about tomorrow...it's not here yet. Keep sharing and also when you comment on others posts and read them you will find how others are coping with the same stuff...and it can help you figure out what will work for you. You know what you need to do to get your head clear kiddo.....and getting honest with you is all that matters....everything else will follow.... we are going to always have to struggle....but being clear headed to do it makes the struggle easier sometimes.... numbing your feelings can leave us stuck. I am in your corner kiddo.... and you know that.....
I don’t know how I’m going to get myself to stop self medicating
we talked about it honey.....and you know that you just have to get honest with yourself kiddo..... do you trust your therapist to talk to about this.... if not... there are other avenues that we also talked about. But you cannot get better otherwise. Nor can you just stop numbing your personal pain without any support and a doctors help so you don't have to suffer withdrawals...that can be terribly dangerous.
It’s my battle no one else’s ... and I have to accept my fate ... I’m doing this to myself and I have yet figured out why
But what are we all looking for honey.... to feel better....to be happier.... If I had given up when I was your age, I would not have had the privileged to be here talking to such a bright young and intelligent person who is just at the place I was. You know that in your heart.... I do care.... when you may feel it hard to feel....because it hurts.... I care.... because you deserve it.....
I’m on the verge of tears 😭 that lump in your throat that hurts so much ....
You're feeling something 👍 keep talking!
It’s very rare for me to cry ... I tend to cry when I’m talking about my problems
There's nothing wrong with crying, we're only human. Although you might feel like you should hide your feelings, that's not healthy. Talk away, tap into what's troubling you so you can start to unravel the hurt and negativity. Open up to your therapist like you have here. If you don't know where to start, show them your posts and replies on this forum. They can only help you if you let them in. I know it's hard to trust and open up when you've been let down and abandoned by those you have relied on before but this is different, your healthcare providers are trained to understand and help you. They won't judge you or be shocked by anything you say, they want to help you but you have to reach out to them so they can do that x
stop believing the lies you have been told that you are not lovable, or worth being loved..... you are a good person who has had bad people hurt you.....that is on them. Don't give those monsters one more atom of your power.....take it back.
let others, including me, be loving and caring to you until you can start believing in your own ability to love yourself.... you did not deserve the childhood you had, you didn't do anything wrong, you were just a kid honey...this is not your fault.
I don’t know how to start too love myself ... I’ve always hated myself ... it’s what my brain says and what I feel and I wish it was different ...
It's good that you're taking responsibility for yourself but you don't have to go it alone, there is support out there and right here. All you have to do is reach out and take one step at a time x
Even here I freeze typing because I don’t know what to say about my thoughts and problems ...
You're doing really well, you're opening up. Don't overthink it, just let it flow. I understand how hard it is to reach out for help when the only response you got when you were growing up was like banging your head against a brick wall, emotional abuse and neglect have a lasting effect and there's nothing wrong with asking for help. Everyone needs help with something at some point in their lives and asking for that help is a healthy way of getting the ball rolling. You can get emotional support from us here and practical help and medical advice from the professionals. I'm so glad you've joined this group, you can post what's going on with you, talk about how you feel or just have good old rant to get it off your chest. We're always here for you and you can talk about anything without fear of judgement or rejection x
Yes it makes sense.one thing i have learned is to appreciate the sparks of happiness i het sometimes and although it may not last but a moment.reflecting on it and what caused it to happen helps me to manage
Spirit19• in reply to
Monday was a good day ... I loved it but yesterday and today I’ve been feeling down and have little energy
• in reply toSpirit19
The best thing i have found for energy is exercise(walk..bike ride etc)..raw natural honey helps also..get out amongst creation such as trees ..water..gardens..sometimes i go to a nursery and just walk around creation
Spirit19• in reply to
It’s hard for me to go places because of my anxiety driving ... and being in a car period
Yes the numbness.. it’s a big part of depression for me 😔
Spirit19• in reply to
I want the numbness to go away so I can live my life and feel free .... and breathe freely ...
It makes sense but doesn't sound healthy. Do you have anyone you can talk to about this in person?
I have my therapist and psychiatrist.... but I freeze when I talk to them ...
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