Breakup

[legallystressed]

I just broke up with my boyfriend bc I’m too depressed/anxious/suicidal to be in a relationship right now. I’m barely functioning. I’ve been thinking about it for a month and I thought I’d feel relieved but I don’t. I just feel even more depressed. I miss him a lot. But I know he deserves better than me

[Hidden]

I’m sorry, I see from your posts how you have been in a cycle of depression and anxiety for a while. Maybe an outpatient therapy would help, or even inpatient. It doesn’t seem like you are improving. I’ve done intensive outpatient therapy and found it very helpful. Maybe it’s time for a “time out” and put your recovery first.

[butterfly_10]

Hello legallystressed,

I first want to tell you that I understand and support you through the online community and if you ever need a person to chat with go ahead and message me, its very important that we have one another to lend a hand when we need help. I know how hard it may be to overcome anxiety and depression, with the thoughts of suicide. But you are first, and embrace that and embrace yourself, try your best to live the life you want, not what you believe you deserve. I noticed when I was in my relationships, they would be amazing at first but ended because of my anxiety and depression. Making ourselves believe these negative notions about ourselves only adds more depressing thoughts, and I know deep down I don't want that and I can feel that you may not want that either. I started to read self-help books, I would meditate, and honestly, it was so hard to love myself and forgive myself for everything I messed up. However, we have one life, and I'm not preaching for you to be this happy-happy person, but allow yourself to the pleasures of life and love yourself for who you are. I know that this all may be easier said than done, but I encourage to start one thing at a time, whether it's eating something better for yourself, doing something different with your style, or maybe even telling yourself that you deserve a happy, abundant, beautiful life. Trust me, we all stumble, but it's our heart and our thoughts that may change everything. Best of luck and of love to you!

Sincerely,

butterfly

[ScottieStyles]

If possible, can you take off somewhere, have you ever considered backpacking somewhere for a couple of months or so, if you can, traveling around a new country reallss does open your eyes and will help you out the cycle

[baileyf14]

I am sorry you are going through this. Relationships can be hard. Have you told him what you are going through? If he knows what you are going through he can try to help you in the best way that he can. Also, have you tried speaking with a professional about what you are going through? Suicidal thoughts are not something to wait around on. I hope everything gets better!

[legallystressed in reply to baileyf14]

I have a therapist I see every week. Every time I’ve tried to talk to him he says things like “you’re scaring me” or “I want you to be ok” and I’ve only told him about 5%. He doesn’t know about my suicidal thoughts or any of that. I feel like he makes it about him and puts more pressure on me. And I just can’t handle that in my current state

[bingoluvr15]

its not that he deserves better than you, you just need time to work on yourself until you can be ready for him!! you got this