He promised to see the kids today, my daughter gave up waiting and went out with a friend but all day my son has been waiting and asking him when he's coming round and the reply was "later" then "don't know".
Now all of a sudden he's away and not back till tomorrow evening!
Why didn't he say so in the first place!
I rang him (on my son's phone so he'd answer) but got so sad when he said I don't need to know where he is I ended up wailing like a banshee down the phone till he hung up.
How can someone be so heartless just flip a switch, turn off their feelings and not care what they've done to someone or how they might be dealing with what you did to them
I can't cope right now, I know it's stupid but I like to know the ins and outs of everything and right now because I don't know anything and infuriatingly not getting answers, I can't even breathe.
Written by
RDC81
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39 Replies
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Okay do slow breaths in through your nose out through your mouth. It will help you. I went through the same thing many many years ago after my ex walked out on me & our son, he never did show up. That's on them. I'm so sorry you have to go through this, it's awful. I'm here for you. Love, peace, joy, light & hugs!!!
You need time to heal & it will happen for you! I don't get all people, some are just so mean & nasty....aren't you happy you aren't like that? Hang in there, this too shall pass! Love, peace, joy, light & hugs!!!
Men are so different sometimes, huh? We have to learn how to deal with them in a way that doesn't make us lose it.
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They are able to be trained, hahaha! I know I did it with mine! Have a beautiful day! Love, peace, light, joy & hugs!!!
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Trained...lol... training wild horses...Oh wait I didn't say that.
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Hahahaha...thanks for the laugh! Maybe like training a dog? Oops did I say that? It only took me 28 years to train mine, patience is a virtue, hahaha! Have a beautiful day my friend, do you have your joy on? I sure hope so! Love, peace, light, joy & hugs!!!
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Well, I will keep my dog training comment to myself. Bless your heart for sticking with it all those years. Dedication really is a thing.
You have a Lovely Day (Bill Withers song)! <3
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I don't give up on anything....Al Green, let's stay together! You can share your dog comment with me, maybe I was to harsh for saying that, guys forgive me? Love, peace, joy, light & hugs!!!
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You weren't harsh. Every now and then we have to call it like we see it. No apologies.
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See that's my thing, I do call it as I see it...hahahaha! Have beautiful times today! Love, peace, light, joy & hugs!!!
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I'm with you!
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Well now you my dear have made my afternoon! More love, peace, joy, light & hugs!!!
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And you have made mine!
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Aaaww thank you so much! Yes more love, peace, joy, light & hugs!!!
Yeah most of us have different body parts, but sometimes men and women act the same.
I’m so sorry you and your babies are going thru this right now. Take deep breaths. Can you and your son do something together to possibly get your mind off of the situation? I know that is so hard. Not only do you hurt but then you deal with looking
I feel such a bad mum right now because I'm angry and I've just told them he doesn't care about them and he's chosen his new bit of stuff over them. Now I hate myself for not being able to take that back, they didn't need to hear that. I'm waiting to get help but I'm worried I'm gonna mess them up before then
Talk to them. Tell them he loves them but he is not thinking right right now. Tell them you said that because he made you very angry when he hurt them and you reacted like a lot of people who are in your situation would. You are in pain. And it just sends you over the edge when you know he hurts your kids. You are human. Divorce sucks. It is so hard on those kids too Try to be very careful what you say to them. They are already hurting. Let you be their safe spot. A place where they can go for that hug and reassurance. I’m sending hugs your way. I know it is a tough place to be.
Being in control is a big thing with probably most of us....we all have our own ways of getting that security.
I think your husband's view of the situation is probably quite different from yours so questioning how he can do what he does or feel what he feels is not going to benefit you...
it'll just make you more frustrated.
He may have regrets down the road....who knows....it's nothing new..busy dad..making promises....getting involved somewhere else....etc...etc.
Stay strong for your kids and let him know he’s hurting them and it’s not fair to them. Also be careful to not do it in front of the kids. Sorry it has to be hard.
Take a big breath in and out ,then slow it down ,you don't wanna hyperventilate, take a bag n breath in n out till you can slow it down . Hope that helped n my mom used to say ..get a cold glass of water .
Also I been their ,my son was about 7 yrs old n my daughter about 12 yrs old ,when we split up . My son took it harder ,would cry n ask me to call him was every minute .... it was so sad to watch him cry n wonder why smh .... But thank goodness I had a great girlfriend, she help me so much . She said the heck with him ,I'll be over me & my daughter n we'll go to a movie he likes !! Worked . Was so nice to see him happy n smiling :)))))
The most difficult part of situations like this is to have to see the disappointment in our kids eyes. My ex did this for years, my kids were 3 & 8 when we split. He let them down often, and finally I told him that he either needed to follow through or not make plans, he quit making plans.... So sad and yet in many ways better for the kids.... Prayers for you as you face this....
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I really miss someone who left me in the dust a few years ago.
I'm new and I'm pouring my heart out I guess. Looking for positivity and a safe place.
advice
I wish people took my illness more seriously. Put just a little bit more effort.
I need help please urgently.
