Need to rant out. Sorry.

Hey, — it’s me again.

I’m sorry to bother whomever is reading this; but I really need to get this out.

So, lately, I feel like my parents, doesn’t want me to go to therapy or get an appointment for the fact that I may have anxiety.

My father, —especially— does not seem pleased. Or rather, he doesn’t seem like he wants me to go to anything like that.

He doesn’t really think it helps— (I know I’ve said this before, but... —sorry).

Not just that but, I feel like that nowadays his advice almost always makes me feel worse. It rarely ever helps. It makes me feel worse than I was before, to say the least. And it’s making me feel so frustrated. I don’t understand why he never seems to just agree with me.

(No, — I wouldn’t want to force him or anything. Of course not. But... I just wish, that sometimes, he would at least listen to me).

But, it doesn’t seem like he does.

All of this makes me beyond frustrated, I just can’t take it.

I once told them that I had suicidal thoughts, but— it was like they didn’t take me seriously. When I told my father about me probably having anxiety, he blamed it on “hormones”.

Hormones.

When he said that. I got mad. Upset. Angry.

He also thought that when I cried after I told him, that I shouldn’t be “frowning” or something.

That, — just made it worse.

And I feel like, I can’t really talk to anyone about this. At this moment, I only have one person I can get myself to really open up to about my problems.

Trust me when I say that; I appreciate their support more than you know, but...

I just... — I just don’t know.

I really just want to go to a therapist. Anything. A place or to someone, where I can talk about it and they’ll just listen.

Not blame it on hormones.

A place where I can be taken seriously.

Because where I stand now; I don’t think I can be taken seriously.

Again, I apologize for ranting this out.

– I hope you have a nice day, afternoon, or night.

— A. ♡

[Hidden]

Dear Hopingtofindlife,

First of all, I love you're user name! It's very positve and upbeat.

You never have to apologize for ranting here. Thats what its here for. Everyone who comes here is here to or give support.

I have a good idea about how you feel. I'm 43. I was abused by my sister who is almost 7 yrs older than me. I told my mom I didn't want to b with her, but she was worried my sister would kill herself so it fell on me. My dad worked alot and also went to school in the evenings so he was rarely around. Now we are older and I have told them both what happened. It took a long time to get them to go to therapy with me. It took a long time to get my dad to listen at all. He likes his computer and his tv. Now he's in his 80's and he's finally coming around. He still says a lot of stuff I hate. He also made it known that he is not going to abandon my sister. She's never faced any real punishment for what she did so it sucks that she still has my dad's complete undying support.

Anyway, I can appreciate ur position. It's very hard when people don't or maybe won't understand. I don't think my dad doesn't love me, but he does in a way differently in a way that is just him. Sometimes we just don't click with someone (our understanding seems to be in a different language from others sometimes) And believe me, I know when u feel really bad, it may seem like something it isnt. I'm glad u recognize that they are supportive. They just may not know what to do. Do u c a dr and can u get some info that maybe u can share that can explain what ur going thru?

I hope this helps and I wish u the best. Take care.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thank you. I appreciate it.

I’m sorry hear this happened to you. You definitely didn’t deserve it. Though, I’m glad to hear its going a bit better.

So, what you’re saying is that not everyone understands each other, fully?

Sadly, — I don’t have a doctor, or— I do, but... it’s.. for other reasons.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Grrr computer savvy me thought I sent a reply to u a couple hours ago, but I screwed up. I'm sorry to leave u hanging.

I agree with Maria love about the generation gap. Also, my dad is more of an intellectual and religious thinker. He can understand the text book expansions on therapies and illness but not necessarily the emotions behind the illness. He wants my sister and I to 4 give each other, tho right now, I cant. That doesn't mean he doesn't understand that I am hurting, he just understands it in a different way or is at least trying to. My mom understands alot better tho she's never been abused, her family was huge (9 kids in the 1940s and 50s) and were farmers. The men got to eat dinner first, then the girls, then my mom' s mom. So she knows some about being put aside.

I hope I didn't mislead u. People do understand especially if they've lived thru similar things. What ur experiencing is validate this group is here for u and the rest of us.

Now this time I am going to do this right and send this!

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

It’s alright, — I understand.

I’m sorry to hear about your father. Hopefully, when you feel like the time is right— you can forgive your sister. Though, I can see how it’s hard to do so.

It doesn’t feel like you mislead me. I’m glad to know someone knows what I’m going through.

I appreciate your support. Thank you. <3

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thanks hon,

When u need to get out your frusteration, we're here. We are all valid and important and so are our feelings.

I hope u r having a good day!

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

No problem.

I’m happy to know that.

Thank you, — you too. 💓

[MariaLove123]

Your Father is from a total different generation where mental illness wasn’t talked about and it just wasn’t well known. Over the years I’ve opened up so much to my parents and now in my 30’s they have told me so much about how depression wasn’t discussed in their households and that led to not talking about it in our household growing up. I knew something was wrong in my early 20’s. It wasn’t just the struggle of teenage years anymore. My Dad would say “it’ll pass” and “you’ll be fine” which just aggravated the heck out of me. I took matters into my own hands. I remember seeing my first psychiatrist and she diagnosed me with severe depression. The more I showed signs, the more my parents got involved. I’m sorry your Dad is not being helpful. Remember that he doesn’t know how to deal with this. But he will learn. Parents can come around. You just have to take care of yourself right now and be patient with him. Talk to friends you trust. I actually wound up talking to my Aunt who I never expected to respond the way she did. She listened and gave me advice. So maybe there’s a family member you can talk to. But definitely make an appointment with a therapist. This is YOUR life. And keep sharing on here. We’re here for you! lots of hugs 🤗

[Hidden in reply to MariaLove123]

Thank you— I appreciate it. Though, I’m unsure if I can take matters into my own hands if that’s what it’s going to take for me to get better.

That’s upsetting to hear about your father. Though, I’m glad to hear it got better and that you opened up to your aunt.

I don’t know if I can talk to my friends about it— I feel unsure of how to talk about this to someone. There was one person I thought of telling, but, my parents, said that it would better to not talk about it to them. (Suicidal thoughts).

All in all; I just feel slightly unsure of what to do....

[Hidden]

I agree with you. Go and see a therapist. Good luck x

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thank you. I’ll try to. ♡

[pink318]

Hi Hopingtofindlife,

I’m sorry that you are having a hard time. You found the right place, the people here are supportive and you will not feel that you are alone. I hope you will find the encouragement you need through this forum.

I pray that you will have peace as you go through this season and you will have the support from your father. Update us please and I hope you will feel better soon.

[Hidden in reply to pink318]

Thank you,, — I appreciate it. Lately a lot of things have been on my mind...

Anyway,, — I’ll try to update upon this specific topic as soon as anything changes. Sadly, so far; doesn’t look anything is going to change anytime soon. Though, I suppose I can just hope and wait and see, for now.

[pink318 in reply to Hidden]

You are in my prayers. Please do not lose hope. I pray that you will always believe that there is hope and soon you will get better. Have a lovely day

[Hidden in reply to pink318]

Thank you so much— I appreciate this more than you know. I hope you have a lovely day, as well. ♡

[pink318 in reply to Hidden]

Hi, how are you today? I hope you are doing great😊

[Hidden in reply to pink318]

Hey, — I’m fine. Thank you for asking!

How are you? <3

[pink318 in reply to Hidden]

Hi,

It's so sunny in my place but I'm enjoying it Few more weeks left for summer.

Have a lovely day!

[Hidden in reply to pink318]

Glad to hear. Lucky you!

Thank you, you too.

[Sam_Walker]

Hi I understand how you feel!! So many of my family members blamed my anxiety on hormones, didn’t take me seriously and thought I was just being dramatic. It’s so frustrating and the only one who I’ve actually opened up to about it is my dad, because I told my mom I was depressed and she just smiled at me as if I was being silly. I’m sorry your parents don’t want to listen, especially since you told them about the suicidal thoughts. The only reason people took me seriously was because a teacher contacted my dad, so if you can talk to a teacher, that should get your parents to realize it’s serious, and hopefully send you to a therapist. If they still don’t let you, this site is really therapeutic even if it’s not professional, and you can talk to online therapists too, although it’s probably expensive. You could also contact a hotline and talk to a therapist on there and get them to talk to you parents. Hope this helps!! good luck!

[Hidden in reply to Sam_Walker]

Thank you so much, Sam. I appreciate your support. I’m glad to hear thins went well for you.

I’m not sure if I can,, — when I told my father and mother about my suicidal thoughts, they told me not to say to any teacher.

All in all; honestly, I don’t know if I can...

What if they’ll be mad? As they told me specifically not to? When I told them?

[Sam_Walker in reply to Hidden]

I think your parents must care about you to some extent. You needed help, you were brave enough to tell them, and they didn’t give you the support you needed, so I think you should talk to a teacher anyway or another family member or adult or friend you trust because you deserve to be happy even if your parents might be in denial. I know it’s really hard to talk about it, it was for me as well, but once you get help you will get better and it will be worth it! I believe you can do it and really hope you’re ok!!

[Hidden in reply to Sam_Walker]

Thank you. I’ll try to get myself to open up to a teacher or so.

[Sam_Walker in reply to Hidden]

They might be mad, my dad gets mad sometimes when I talk too much to him about it, but they shouldn’t get mad and don’t be scared of their reaction because they should care about your wellbeing and once they realize you really aren’t happy they should want to help. If they’re still mad, then just know you did the right thing. Every day is hard for people with mental illnesses and facing it is really brave! Best wishes!!

[Hidden in reply to Sam_Walker]

Thank you! ♡

[Fluffy44]

Is there anyone in your church that you feel comfortable talking with??? Maybe a pastor or group leader! I’m so sorry u are experiencing such pain. My daughter and I both have anxiety and we both see a dr and gave orescrubed meds. It’s really hard for people who don’t have anxiety or want admit they have it to identify with those that experience these dark feelings that we have. I will pray for your parents to have opened minds about slowing you to get the professional help that you need. I will pray for God to ease your anxiety pains also!! Please always share with us cause we want to help!!

Linda

[Hidden in reply to Fluffy44]

Thank you, Linda.

I don’t... go to church much. Though, I’ll try to get myself to open up to someone.

I appreciate your support. Do know it means a lot. ♡

[Fluffy44 in reply to Hidden]

That’s a good start!!

[Hidden in reply to Fluffy44]

Mhm. It is.

[Fluffy44]

How are you feeling today?? Praying you are ok!

Linda

[Hidden in reply to Fluffy44]

I’m feeling alright— how are you feeling?

And thank you.

[Fluffy44]

I’m ok!! Today was an ok day for that I am thankful

[Hidden in reply to Fluffy44]

Glad to hear.

[SuZQ154]

We are here for you and understand. Anxiety is real, and people who have not experienced it are not always understanding. Please know there is hope. My anxiety has improved over the years because of Christian counseling, support groups, and Bible studies. Also, a pivotal life moment was when I realized God says we are only to have one fear. Fear of the Lord. That changed my life. I used to have paralyzing fears of heights and speaking in front of crowds. Since that day when I knew in my heart God did not want me to be afraid of these, I have been reasonably "cautious" and appropriately nervous, but I no longer have fear! Please know there is hope!!

[Hidden in reply to SuZQ154]

Thank you. I appreciate your support, and— I will. 💓

[Fluffy44 in reply to SuZQ154]

I too find that Talking to Jesus in my dark times hells to ease my pain. He is there waiting for us to just reach out to Him for help.

Yes dear is a liar it will try to steal our happiness. I don’t know if you have heard the song but u can google it if you want!!

Thank all of you for this site it means the world to me to talk to likeminded people!

Be safe and prayers for everyone!!

Linda