Was called "rude"

[hrutger]

Hello. Anxiety and irritability nudged me to say something that was later called rude.

I had a short-deadline project dropped on me yesterday, and I was trying to get through it as quickly as possible. My colleague came in saying she had a question and I told her I needed to finish something time-sensitive. She said her question was time-sensitive too. Her question: Could I make it to a meeting that was nearly a week away?

I was so keyed up about my deadline and so annoyed that she thought this question was more urgent than mine that I said something to the effect of: "Here's what I am doing... was your question really more urgent than this?"

Somewhere between words and tone, I came across as rude (to this colleague and to a volunteer working in the same room).

I have been told about setting boundaries and saying what I need - in this case I needed to work uninterrupted on something time-sensitive. I tried to say that, and was rude. Later my colleague gently confronted me about it (gently), and as nice as she tried to be, I burst into tears.

I'm currently working a job-and-a-half because my closest colleague recently left and we're short staffed. I'm busy and tired practically every day. When I was told that I was rude, it felt like a punch (even though I probably WAS rude and even though my colleague confronted me gently). Fact is, I'm functioning at my limit, and a person who understood that might have given me a pass. Or maybe I can't expect passes.

Not sure. But I cried for a good 10 minutes and was upset for the rest of the day. Because this confrontation occurred in the morning, I had it on my mind for the rest of the day at work. During the confrontation I apologized to the colleague and said she was right that I was rude, but if she needs to discuss something like this again, perhaps we could do it at the end of the day.

To an outsider, this entire thing must look rather small. But it never left me, all day, and I cried again when I got home. Then I felt a greater than usual need to isolate.

I'm anxious without a doubt; never formally diagnosed as depressed, but I suspect I must have some degree of it -- or something else that leads to this variety of sensitivity. It seems highly inefficient and dysfunctional that one hard moment could color a whole day.

[Hidden]

So you wanted to get something done and someone wouldn't let you be alone to get on with it. Plus the pressure of doing more than one job. I'd say a lot if people would have reacted exactly as you did.

Stop worrying about it and carry on. Dont put added pressure on yourself because if this.

[hrutger in reply to Hidden]

I appreciate the response. I hope my brain will let up, and I can, as you say, carry on. The angst I feel about it is involuntary, and I certainly didn't choose it or wish to prolong it. My mood has lightened up somewhat since yesterday. So hopefully that will continue.

[Hidden in reply to hrutger]

It will let up but don't sit and dwell on it, it might actually get people in your work to stop bothering you when you are to busy.

Something positive might come from it.

[hrutger in reply to Hidden]

Who knows? Maybe it will have that result.

[Hidden]

I get called rude by my family. Till they walk in my shoes they can scratch their a**.

[Lindabellle]

I agree. Don't dwell on it. There is no need to punish yourself be revisiting what happening. It's done.