My life everyday

[Restless09]

Ive been really depressed and been having anxiety and panic attacks . my mom recently passed a year n a half ago from cancer . she was so brave and the best . she always kept my family together she did everything for us and we found out she had cancer and in a blink of an eye she was no longer with us . i cried and cried and still i do. Ever since shes been gone i have been dealing with depression and so much . i cant breath sometimes i start shaking and i start thinking negative thoughts . it hard especially when noones around to be there 4 you . i have tried hurting myself more thsn once because i feel like the world would b better without me but i stop cause i get scared 2 go through with it but im losing my mind i dont know what 2 do anymore i cant take it . i cant take any pain anymore it hurts

[tamka38]

Sorry about her lose I lose my dad when I was 8 so I know how it feels to miss someone and how it feels to be alone do u see a psychiatrist or a counselor? Do u have friends u can talk to u shouldn’t have to do this alone please reach out to as many people u can to get the help and support u need. Am here for u if u ever need someone to talk too

[Restless09 in reply to tamka38]

No im currently not seeing anyone for it but i know i have to cause its overwhelming n i dont really have any friends and im not on good terms with family right now

[tamka38 in reply to Restless09]

U can always texts 741 741

[Hidden]

Oh sweetie! I’m so sorry you are in so much pain. I understand what you are going through. My mom just passed a few months ago from cancer and she was the glue that held our family together. The negative thoughts are the result of depression. Remember they are just thoughts. This sadness and depression plays evil tricks on your mind.

You aren’t alone. I was in an extremely dark place and just snapped out of it for now. It’s a pain that seems completely encompassing and you feel like there is no end. I’m telling you there is an end to this feeling. You will have to take it day by day. Right now you may feel alone and like no one can relate but I can relate and there are many on here that can.

Please hang in there. I’m sure she doesn’t want to see you suffer. Your love for your mom is beautiful and live each moment in memory of your mom! ❤️

[Restless09 in reply to Hidden]

I know im trying to take it day by day but its just hard sometimes and with my family problems right now its even more n its just more n more piling on and it gets worse and all the thoughts are in my head and i start thinking itll be best if i was gone but i know she wouldnt want it n i get scared 2 completely do it and yes i see people are going through things as well on here and im trying to do this 2 help to get it out there without being judged so im hoping this will help a lil thank you

[Hidden in reply to Restless09]

Definitely no judgement. When you are in a dark place it’s hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. It’s irrational and overwhelming but there there is one! Please try to go to grief counseling. Through your church or look online for something close to you. It helps!!!

[hypercat54]

Hi I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved mum. It seems to me that you are stuck in the grieving process and need help. I would go to your doctor and ask for bereavement counselling.

Moving on doesn't mean you will ever forget the loved one you have lost but recognising the need to still continue living your life. Your mum will forever occupy a very special place in your heart and will live forever there.

I believe our loved ones are always with us and would your mother be happy to know how you are feeling? After all she would want you to be happy and productive knowing that you will meet again one day. You have many years yet though and you need to make her proud of you so you will have lots to tell her when it's your turn. x

[Restless09 in reply to hypercat54]

Thank you i know thats why im trying to just take it slow and do other things to try and take my mind off of it cause it hurts me 2 cause i know she wouldnt want me hurting myself or anything so im trying my best 2 stop and i know im gonna make an appointment thank you

[hypercat54 in reply to Restless09]

Hi it will always hurt so you must accept that I'm afraid. I lost my mother 5 years ago now and it still hurts. It doesn't consume my mind like it used to though and time (cliche or not) really is a great healer. x

[brightbronzexo]

Hurting yourself is never the answer...regardless of the pain u feel. I always try to think 'the world is going to hurt u, so at least the one person in ur corner has to be You!" This one sentence stops me from doing alot of things that harm myself...whether it be self harm or just not eating, or not taking care of myself in general. Also u should try to talk to someone may be a trusted friend or a therapist. I'm sure even after u typed everything out and posted it u felt so much better. It helps to let out some of those feelings. And if all else fails think of how proud your mom will be of you when you beat this thing 💜. So please don't give up 🤗

[Restless09 in reply to brightbronzexo]

Thank you yes it did i do feel a bit better just to get it out and thank you all for responding . just these talks help as well . im gonna do my best to try n get through this

[Anxiouspony12]

Hi well I'd say your poor mum would want you to live your life and to be proud of you! She'd want you to find a good friend and find out what you are good at and to follow your heart always!!! Keep it real for her god bless!!!

[Restless09 in reply to Anxiouspony12]

Thank you i know im gonna try n live my life n be happy but i know its gonna take time but i dont want my mom to be hurt up in heaven because im hurting

[Anxiouspony12]

That's right well it will take time maybe your mum is thinking of you right now you never know! I believe that anybody we care about lives on in spirit and it's a good way to see things! 😊I had my grandma and dog die and believing that helped me so much!!!

[tylerjjjj]

Im sorry for your loss. I lost my grandma in July to stage 4 lung and brain cancer we didnt even have a year after the diagnosis. . Like your mom, my grandma was very brave and the best person in the world. I literally read your post and thought i wrote it because it's exactly how i feel. Its okay to cry, its okay to grieve, its okay to take a moment to yourself. What i have learned in the past few months is that yes things are going to be hard because shes not there but things could also be easier because shes watching over you, helping to direct your steps. I write to myself everyday, i write down my prayers and any thoughts I have. Just to be able to release even if its not to another person is therapeutic. Please, dont hurt yourself. I took that route and at the end of the day, that pain from your mother being gone is still there. Learn how to live with her spirit. Learn how to talk to your mother and listen for her voice. I have to keep telling myself this isnt the end of my life because it was the end of hers. Please, if you need tot talk to someone, inbox me. I hope you get better.

[Restless09 in reply to tylerjjjj]

Sorry for your loss as well . i know im gonna do that im gonna try n live my life n try n get thru it n stop hurting myself because i know she wouldnt want this its gonna take me some time but im gonna try. I just know its gonna b tough cuz i miss her but i know i thibk its good for me to write too just to get it off my mind cuz i just have so much bottled in and its hurting me. N i used 2 write before maybe itll help a little n im gonna try n get help

[Restless09 in reply to Restless09]

Thank you so much

[Restless09 in reply to tylerjjjj]

Thank you i will