Return of self-harm thoughts

[Wolf_in_a_Jar]

It's been 3 years since I've had really serious thoughts of self harm and in the past when these thoughts have popped up I've been able to manage them by listening to music, meditating, reading, video games or exercising. But for some reason this time the thougths aren't really going away. So I've been relying on my own will to stop myself from self-harm. And its getting harder and harder because my will is weakening as the urge isn't receding. I don't want to succumb to my old s-h ways that overshadowed my life for 5+years because I've worked so hard to take the proper steps (counseling, meditation, communication with those close to me) to prevent my self from going down the terrible rod of self-harm again. I feel like I'm barely hanging on, I've spent about an hour a day for the past 3 day staring at my old scars and crying my eyes out wishing they would just dissappear for my body forever as well as the memories of all those time I self-harmed. It's just so hard. But I guess I just need to forcing myself to believe that s-h is bad and it'll only make things worse.

[Hidden]

Think of how far you've made it without hurting yourself and about these old scars there are cream and treatments that make them fade u won't even be able to see them

[Choosejoy]

I'm so sorry you are struggling right now. I was thinking a way to look at your old scars is to view them as a victory. You over came that behavior. Thst is huge! Please know thst God loves you. He's the one who gave you the strength to overcome. And He will again. I don't know your faith. But I do know that Jesus died for you. I know He died for me and loves us unconditioally. You are a precious gift!

[Wolf_in_a_Jar in reply to Choosejoy]

Thank you, this is what I needed to hear, I had never thought about this in a religious/faith way. Thank you I'll definetly try and move forward keeping this in mind

[Choosejoy]

You're welcome.

[User1964]

I too, have scars from s-h. They are a reminder for me to now be kind and gentle to myself.

[Choosejoy in reply to User1964]

That is so good

[Hidden]

I know it can be hard. If your previous scars are triggering you, then I suggest this website.

livenobs.com/blogs/fresh/go...

I've not tried them, but I've heard from many places that they work. Hugs. You can do this.