Hurting ur self in many ways

I find ways to hurt my self physically / emotionally , I over eat to where I’m sick or I don’t eat for weeks , I cut my self , I say bad things in my head , I over work my self , lock my self away form people, shut my self down. I guess I always find a way to hurt my self to stop the pain that hiding deep down. I seem so happy and cheerful to everyone else because I make sure they are okays but really I’m shitting my self cause all I want to do I hurt my self but I try not to, I don’t want go on pills as I was on them before they didn’t help and see the doctor just make me feel like my shit , the one person I need is dead and all my mates got their own life to be worrying about me I guess I’m just alone , I have family but tbh I’m the glue keep the family together, it very stressed full , I feel like running away and living a crazy fun life. Just feel like I miss out in so much because I had to become very grown-up just to help my family stay together. I never been able to be my self

[schrodingercat]

I think I understand about being the lifeline for too many people at once, and I also self-harmed for a while. Firstly, I was really struck by your inclusion of emotional self-harm in your list -- it can be hard to acknowledge that as a form of self-damage, and it's a good step in the right direction!

You probably already know this well, but I just want to remind you that it's okay to lean on others yourself. You mentioned that a counsellor/therapist isn't helpful for you (and that's okay! they don't work for everyone), but if there's someone in your life you could confide in, that can be a big help. Sometimes, just having someone to whom you are accountable can reduce to urge to self-harm, since you know they'll be checking up on you.

For more easily applied advice, drawing on yourself with a marker where you would have cut can act as a way to sort of wean oneself off the sense of cutting. This is kind of silly, but for me, painting my fingernails helped; at the time it helped distract me like the marker would and later I could fiddle with the peeling paint to help with nervous fidgeting.

Finally, please remember that you're not now and not ever alone in these feelings! I promise there are always others who can relate, who have gone through the same struggles, and who might be able to help. It's so lonely trying to hold too many others together, but there are many people here who would be happy to support you as best they can.

Stay strong, friend! ^^

[2getbetter]

I’ve been dealing with similar issue to and I want you to know your not alone and sometimes it takes a while to get on the right medication. Try to keep working with your Dr to try a different medicine and let him know why you didn’t like the last one you were on.

[Soccermomalways]

Bill since you dont want to take meds give GABA A try. Its a natural supplement. My daughter has anxiety and depression and meds are not helping her either. A few people i know said gaba worked well for them!! Dont give up hope for a happy life!

[Catwoman227]

I've never heard of it

[Windy101]

I'm sorry that you're hurting, Bill. Sometimes it feels like no matter what we do, things don't get better. I can't add to the good advice here except to say I'm one more person who wishes you well. I've just had a dark time myself and am coming out of it now, so I know it's possible. I hope in time that instead of hurting yourself, you can turn things around and do things that are good for you, even if you don't feel like it. Maybe you will gain some momentum and feel better.

Take care and best wishes to you, friend.