This is hell- please respond

[tashalyn]

I hope somebody replies to me with an answer that will comfort my brain and spirit

The thoughts are becoming unbearable

The thoughts tell me I am the only person in the world

The only existence there is

That the people around me are a result of my imagination

That there is no god

There is no salvation

There is only me with eternal pain and suffering

I am loosing my ability to reason with these thoughts

They are driving me suicidal

Like if I die this will all stop

I called my psychiatrist because I really felt danger for myself

He is gonna put me on an antipsychotic olanzapine starting tonight

He says my thought process is disturbed

Please I would appreciate any replies

[hypercat54]

Hi tashalyn not sure I can help but I wanted to reply to you. It sounds like your psychiatrist is taking you seriously if he is putting you on a new med straight away. This should help and give you some hope. Do you think admittance to a mental hospital for a short time would help you? It would at least keep you safe while the new meds start working. Could you ask your psychiatrist to admit you?

Meanwhile stay with us here and we will keep talking to you and try to keep you more grounded. x

[tashalyn in reply to hypercat54]

Unfortunately where I live the mental hospitals are horrible and my psychiatrist thinks it will just worsen me being in that atmosphere, am going to start the medication today hoping it will kick in and give some relief

[Smellycat123456]

There is a god I asked him for help and he gave it to me

[tashalyn in reply to Smellycat123456]

Why isn’t he answering my prayers?

[Smellycat123456]

Yesterday I was having a bad day and I had to pull over, after taking a few deep breaths I opened up my heart and prayed for someone to talk to like a preacher and a familiar face ,after calming down I moved forward with my day and when I leased exspected it both landed in my lap.

The way I got it was he put it out there for me to find, I just needed to calm down and move forward to the next page. After I talked to the preacher he told me to read Jeremiah 29/ 11. It gave me the strength to turn to the next page of my day and that's when I found the familiar face and I was happy after that till I got home

[Celtic27]

Hi tashlyn how are you to day ? Ive been out shopping but was glad to get home ! I wouldnt go near a mental health facility if you can avoid it ive seen what they can be like ! As long as youve got a good support network around you that will help you take care and all the best david

[tashalyn in reply to Celtic27]

Thank you for your reply. Yes indeed I totally agree that I should avoid a mental health facility, and specially where I live -a 3rd world country- it’s like a mental asylum. I just hope those pills work. That this be over soon. It has taken its toll on me and my beloved husband

[Hugsforyou28]

Hey there- I know how you're feeling. I feel it too. Please know that it DOES get better and you are not alone. Time does heal all wounfs. I have suffered on and off from depression most of my life and it has always gone away. It came back and I'm going thru the pain now but knowing I've survived it before has given me the strength and hope that it will eventually subside. I know it ca. Be unbearable while you're going thru it and you just want the pain to go away but suicide isn't the right answer. It's a permanent solution to a TEMPORARY problem. Please find love for yourself again. Treat yourself like you would treat someone you really love. What would you say to that person ? When I get in that negative self talk, I just tell my negative self to "shut up! You're wrong!" Sounds silly but it does work. Try hypnosis and meditation for anxiety and depression. Also try going to support groups for depression. Isolating yourself is a dangerous symptom of depression, surrounding yourself with people who will understand you will help. Please don't give up, there's so much beauty in life and it WILL get better

[Anxiousjy in reply to Hugsforyou28]

This. ❤️

[tashalyn in reply to Hugsforyou28]

Thank you so much for your respond and taking time to reply honestly means a lot, I try to think of the times I wasn’t depressed so that it helps me with the current time and in knowing that this pass too just like before thank you a lot

[Hugsforyou28 in reply to tashalyn]

Of course. I'm so glad that I came across this site. It is so nice to be able to ask for support in a safe place without judgement and everyone understands one another. I'm here for support anytime you need it. I'm a good listener and I also care. Please feel free to message me if you need help . You WILL overcome this. It will pass. I'm on your side !

[tashalyn in reply to Hugsforyou28]

Thank you thank you thank you

[Hopeful-Tinkerbell]

Maybe inpatient would be a good idea. It was a saving grace for me! They were able to observe and get my meds just right. It wasn’t like a hospital. More like a house with a few people that were a lot like me. I actually was scared to death but when I was able to leave I had my meds good and was much better able to cope. I hated leaving! It’s so beneficial. You are not alone though and yes. There is a God!

[Anxiousjy]

The fact that you come here for answer is a good indication that you’re sane. People who are crazy won’t question this thoughts or even look for help. I hope you surpass this, I know you will.

[tashalyn in reply to Anxiousjy]

Thank you for your reply, indeed in a way that makes a lot of sense

[Anxiousjy in reply to tashalyn]

You cannot worry yourself crazy. I know it’s scary but the more you fight it the more it will take over your life. Stop questioning life, take it as it is. I think you’re suffering from severe dr/dp. You’re not losing the plot, you’re brain is just tired. If a question pops in your mind again, let it in, then dismiss it. Example: ( “Everything around you is not real”, ok I hear you, now I have to go on with my life”) When your brain recognizes that you don’t over think about those things anymore, the anxiety will subside.

[tashalyn in reply to Anxiousjy]

I totally agree with you. I need to get a grip on this before it takes over me, some days it is easy to do, and others it’s very difficult but am going to promise myself to hold it together this week

[Anxiousjy in reply to tashalyn]

We tend to over analayze these thoughts and that causes anxiety which causes the feeling of unreality. Accept them as they are, because no matter how you doubt everything, you’ll always know in your heart what’s real. That’s your weapon. Lots of love to you!

[tashalyn in reply to Anxiousjy]

I love what you said “you will always know in your heart what’s real” this really sinks in. Thank you so so much lots of hugs and kisses

[Anxiousjy in reply to tashalyn]

Glad I could be of help. Don’t hesitate to message me if you need anything. I’ve been there and surpassed it. You will too!

[Pearl67]

Tashalyn, I am so sorry you are suffering. Do you have someone who can be with you or spend the night while you are in such a serious state? And when you start new medication? I think having someone there with you is important if going into a facility is not an option!

Peace! And yes, God is with you, even if your mind is telling you otherwise.

[tashalyn in reply to Pearl67]

Thank you for your reply and concern, yes thanks god I have my husband who has been so supportive

[Southernchick]

I'm certainly not qualified to give you any answers but it appears to me you feel so alone.

Do you have any friends or family members who knows your situation.

Wish there was someone close enough to give you an actual hug.

Each person's spiritual life is normally a private thing. Was wondering if you just went to a service and set in. You wouldn't have to participate.

Even a meditation session might calm and present a feeling of well being.

Stay here with us for sure.

We all have stories and one day very soon you will be paying it forward offering comfort and suggestions to all of us poor souls.

Do you have anyone that you love?

Do continue to see your Dr. Take your meds. Listen to your body. Share all feeling of which med seems to help which one doesn't.

I find one my darkest days when I smile at a stranger they always seem to smile back. The feeling that gives me lifts my spirits.

SC

[Southernchick in reply to Southernchick]

I see you have a husband. Gets lots of good hugs from him. A real genuine hugs has so much calming effect. For me there is a God and he's promised not to forsake me.

Hugs to you and we all care. SC