I’m very unhappy. I can’t socialise. People are distant. In my country everybody is so welcoming and open. Here everybody lives in his own world. Close fields act like they just know each other and nothing more. I even talked with a native about it and he said I am right and it’s just the way people are.
Classes haven’t been what I expected. I am in theatre class, but apparently for my teacher theatre is also watching an octopus… No practice neither. All theater plays they suggest we watch are not real plays, it’s like a conference - people come and tell their stories.
My parents don’t want me to return in my country. Education there isn’t good. But as it seems, neither is here. They say that with an European diploma I will have more changes to work in theatre in my country, but who knows? They won’t take me if I don’t have any practice. If theatre lessons are an option, I can take it in my country too, but they aren’t an option.
I am feeling awful every single day. I cry for hours. I am miserable. I keep thinking of what I had. And the thoughts that my ex could probably be the best thing I had (even though he was a bad person) aren’t helping me.
My only motivation to go to lectures is to take the damn diploma in 3 years. The only reason I haven’t given up is because I have no place to go.
Written by
sad_watermelon
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
Which Country are you in at the moment , and which Country is you native Country?I'm sorry you are feeling so low.
Don't let feeling lonely make you wonder about getting back with someone whom was not good for you.
You split with your Ex for a reason , and that reason won't have changed.
We all start to get a bit of nostalgia about Ex's when we feel lonely, but nostalgia has a habit of only reminding us of the good things not the bad ones so it's best not to act on nostalgia when we feel vulnerable because we can make decisions that aren't good for us.
Are you going to a college for your theatre courses?
Perhaps they have some social groups that you could join , like a Drama group or a group for foreign students so that you could get to chat to people with interests like yours and find it easier to make some friends. Most colleges also have introductory social get together to help you connect with people and make friends. You might find social groups to hard to be in , but if you even try for a few minutes you may find that you enjoy it and could build up the time you socialise.
Your college, or area that you live in, might also have a face to face support group for people with Anxiety that you could join to talk through how you are feeling with people whom understand.
Have a look online or check on your college website for groups and activities, or see if your theatre courses administrator can give you advice on where to look.
Drama classes can be a bit unusual at first.
Often you get to watch silly things or they ask you to act out silly things or just say dialogues about your own life to help you get comfortable acting outside the box, or speaking about things that can make you feel exposed to the audience.
This lesson in pushing your boundaries is usually quite helpful for most acting students before the real workshops and chances to act in things begins .
But it's not the best way to learn for an acting student with Anxiety.
It can make you feel out of touch with what you are doing and a little lost.
Perhaps it would be a good idea to let your acting teacher or class mentor know you suffer with Anxiety and you are finding the style of the workshops quite hard at the moment, ask what else you will be doing in the future so that you can prepare for it and not feel as anxious about the material.
If they know I'm sure they will do what they can to help you feel more comfortable and connected in your classes.
They may even suggest that you get a class buddy whom spends time with you in classes with support to make things easier.
Give things a little longer and see if their are options out there that can make your life abroad easier and the adventure you hoped it would be.
Take care , and keep posting if you need more support , Bee
I actually don’t have anxiety from performing. I did it multiple times and it’s something I love and it even makes me feel good. But sadly there are no acting classes or clubs, not even in university. It a big university with a lot of faculties. I tried so hard to reach to people, but they are not social at all. Most of the people in my class are there because they are bored. They are also in small groups since the first day and don’t like talking to other people than those in the group
Getting adjusted to college is difficult for everyone and on top of that getting used to a new country doubles the difficulty. It is normal to feel very homesick and this feeling can last for a month or even two, I understand, and I also remember myself, that it is very painful. You have to keep in mind that being homesick is a temporary and normal feeling. I think Blearyeyed has some very good suggestions, as well.
Being at somewhere new isn't always sunshine and rainbows. Despite how movies portray it.
College blues are real. You get homesick. Everything is new which is scary because it's unfamiliar to you. Learning new things and meet new people. And you're feeling like a fish out of water.
It's natural for the nervous system to be used to the comfort hell than the unfamiliar heaven. That's why you still think about that dbag ex boyfriend. You agree he wasn't good for you and he was a bad person with serious mommy issues. But it was something you knew.
Here, you don't have that. And like everything it takes time to adjust to your new surroundings.
Remember this is just temporary. Even though it feels like it will always be this way. It won't.
You'll get the hang of things. Eventually you'll find your people. Other theater kids and start creating relationships.
It's okay to feel blue right now. Just remember this too shall pass.
You're going through a lot. If university wasn't hard enough, you're also dealing with thoughts of your ex. Trust me when I say that you're not the only one struggling to adjust to university and university life. Have you talked to your parents about this, and what do they suggest?
That's kind of harsh. Ok well, at least they're right about the shouldn't give up part. It does get easier. It really does. You'll find your rhythm. It's hard for all freshmen. All of a sudden everyone has to get used to a new way of living (and that becomes literal for those who are far from home).
I don’t and I don’t have room for one. But I am worried we don’t study what we should or at least what I need. We study theory when I need more practice. And practice is only in academias where I can’t get because I have a little accent…
I'm glad you talked to them. More theory because not familiar with practice? That's interesting... But then again, I know nothing about theater. It seems to be that the first person who commented does, so that's good.
Unviversity/college is like putting something together before you can use it. You need to go through this, this, and this step before you get to a certain point, and then the real work begins. The setup for my 4-year college was that the first two years were more like high school class requirements (math, science, English, electives, etc). I didn't get into my major classes until my 3rd year. In fact, I wasn't even allowed to declare my major until the end of my 2nd year (and this was regardless of whether I knew what I wanted to do right away or not).
But it’s sad. I don’t have motivation to go there anymore. Right now I am sitting in the cold alone because every person I knew found somebody better, so I guess every lunch will be like that…
There are normally counsellors on staff. Can you talk to one of them about what you're feeling? Also, dorms have RAs (Resident Advisors). Might be a good idea to talk to yours. I'm sorry it's so hard.
They said there is a therapist for this, but I takes a few months to get an appointment. Here the school isn’t really interested in our mental health I guess 😂. We have a special hour every week with a teacher who is supposed to teach us how to work in university and how to be good, but he said we should make friends the first week, otherwise we will be alone (he studies in the same university, but he is in master). I couldn’t make friends the first week , so I guess he is right, because now I am alone. There will be 2 parties - tomorrow and after tomorrow. I was so exited, but now I am hesitating if I should go, if it’s to stay alone again, I would rather be alone at home where it’s safe (it’s dangerous during the night here)
He said that?! Yikes!😬. Talk about cheerful...No, that is very wrong. I'm sorry he said that to you because I can tell that you took that in and believed it.
I’m happy you had your hot chocolate ! Cheers (even with hot chocolate 😂). For the moment I am waiting for my class to start. I am a bit confused, because I don’t know if things here are gonna get better, or not. I don’t want to lose time. I would prefer to change the university and try again, but I don’t want to go too fast. But in the same time the more I wait, the harder it will be to start over
Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.
Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.
I am totally new here. I feel like i am depressed for the past few months because I am gonna get a divorce.
My dads bouse
I never feel like I fit in with my friends. 
Am disappointed in myself 
Anxiety at night 
