Depressed tired lonely

[Southernchick]

Hi ever felt lonely empty even in a room full of people. My mind knows all the right things to do but I'm simply unable to follow through.

[fauxartist]

yes, very much of the time when I was socializing a lot...felt very isolated, just didnt feel like I fit in. But when I broke the ice occasionally, I did have some fun. But being very wary of people, I kept things light so I wouldn't get to caught up in anything.

[Southernchick in reply to fauxartist]

I know I keep things very light also. There is a woman in here screaming I just want to let go. Laugh so hard tears run down my face. Hope you feel better soon.

[Hidden]

Yep, I know that feeling...

you know all the right moves to make and the words to say, (because when we are in a good space, its just so effortless and spontaneous), but you don't act. You feel a bit frozen, seperate from the moment, always second-guessing yourself, also I feel consipicous - as if people can sense or judge that I'm somehow "not ok (socially)" - which is frustrating because its temporary.

Usually anxiety and stress does this to me, or if something has knocked my confidence. Part of us shuts down because we already dealing with a lot - in the same way as an animal instinctively retreats into its hardened armour or protective shell. It's basically the primitive, evolutionary part of our brain that is hardwired to instinctive protective responses which bypass conscious thought or decision-making. This doesnt make us weird, its a normal response that doesn't always serve us well in achieving our goals in the modern world.

I'm not asking you to reveal anything, just to ask yourself are you able to identify anything that might have caused you to start feeling like this? Sometimes it can be something significant that most people would identify with, or "insignificant" (to others that is).

[Southernchick in reply to Hidden]

Hi your able to describe me to a tee. Last year had more downs than ups. I'm struggling to make some changes. Life style. Getting out more. Having others step up to the plate with responsibility that should not be mine. Zapping my strength energy finances time.

Thanks stay strong sc

[Hidden in reply to Southernchick]

Hi... its interesting that you say I was able to describe you to a tee. Without invalidating your current struggles, it's probably because that's how I respond during times of anxiety and stress too.. which suggests 2 things;

its reassuring we experience this in similar ways because it suggests our experiences during times of difficulty are more common than we may tell ourselves at the time (rather than "unusual" or due to any personal deficiencies).

even more helpfully, is that while the condition of anxiety or depression is less than we would want, it isn't who we are at the core

[Southernchick in reply to Hidden]

Thanks Ash. If helps to read and reflect that hopefully these times are temporary