Feeling numb and lacking emotional contact in my marriage

[Clarebear86]

I’m struggling a lot lately with the lack of emotional connection I have for and towards my husband. Yes I love him, but I am still in love with him? I had major trust issues & rather than face up to them I think I may have buried them and decided to just not care anymore. Has anyone had anything similar happen to them? Does the numbness and inability to care go away or is it time to face up to the fact that I may not be happy in my current marriage any more. Thanks to those of you who take the time to read this, even if you don’t reply

[Simonn]

Hi clare sorry your feeling this way. Are you able to speak to your husband. Is this just a clitch because of depression. Wish i could offer more advise. Hope you get through this.

[Clarebear86 in reply to Simonn]

Hi Simonn, thanks for the reply. No unfortunately I can’t talk to him about this, I can’t talk to him much about anything anymore. I tried to explain that I thought we should have some time apart & his response was that I wasn’t getting our daughter if I left him. So no I think our communication has really broken down.

[Simonn in reply to Clarebear86]

Sorry to hear that. I guess you have to think about what you want for you and your daughter. If you need to vent you can msg me

[Clarebear86 in reply to Simonn]

Thanks may just take you up on that one of these days. How are you?

[Hopeful-Tinkerbell]

I feel the very same way. I’ve been hurt over and over. I just quit caring and gave up. I sit here alone when he rarely comes home. When he does it’s no different. We don’t communicate at all. It’s like roommates only he’s a jerk sometimes. It’s very hard. I understand though. I have to get ready for work but I’ll call you later.

[Clarebear86 in reply to Hopeful-Tinkerbell]

Thanks very much I’m just so confused & don’t know what to do for the best. I just can’t seem to shake this feeling & I’m thinking I will be so much better by myself.

[Hopeful-Tinkerbell in reply to Clarebear86]

You have to do what’s best for you. For me I feel like I can’t live with him and I can’t live without him. I dream about it all the time but I’m scared. I also can’t imagine how I will make it on my own though.

[Clarebear86 in reply to Hopeful-Tinkerbell]

I know I do, but it’s hard knowing the result, but at the end of the day he doesn’t define me or make me who I am. I hope things improve for you. I did feel the way you described once about not being able to live without him.

[Hopeful-Tinkerbell in reply to Clarebear86]

It’s definitely the unknown that scares me. That and my financial state. I’m afraid the grass won’t be greener on the other side and I’ll regret it.

[Clarebear86 in reply to Hopeful-Tinkerbell]

I can appreciate that.

[2tired2beme]

have you talked to your doctor or a counselor? The trust issues make it difficult. I am sorry that you are in this situation. There is a great audio book called 'girl, wash your face' that i am listening to and it is helpful in some ways. It helps to look at the good things in your life, and there is one chapter that helped me to be more aware of making an effort in my marriage.

I am still hung up on a relationship that was 30 years ago... it's ridiculous, but true. this book is helping me straighten out my thoughts. I hope you find some answers