Hi, I’ve you never done anything like this before. I guess I’ll just tell my story. I’ve been depressed for 11 months. I know what triggered my depression & I’ve moved past that. I have a therapist (he’s a great guy) I see him once a week & I take medicine twice a day. I have a great group of friends who always support me, but I push them away. My family supports me & wants me to get better. I’m doing good in school, I play a sport & I enjoy it a lot. I have a part time job & love the people I work with. I have a good life right now. I had a rough childhood, but I’ve moved past it. It doesn’t haunt me anymore. But somehow with all the happiness I have in my life I’m still so depressed. I’m such a people pleaser but I can’t seem to please myself. No matter what I try to be happy it never works out. It’s like I’m in a hole & no matter how much I try to climb out i end up deeper then I was before. I’m not currently suicidal but I have been before. I’ve attempted multiple times. I know it’s not my only option, but it seemed like such a good one. There’s a quote that I really like bc I feel as if i can relate to it. It’s “I don’t want to live, but I’m too scared to die” I know that if I killed myself it would affect everyone I know. I’m not an outsider. I have plenty of friends. I’m involved in school activities. I do community service. Nothing I do seems to help tho. I’ve been in therapy since August & on medicine since June. I want to be happy, I really do it’s just very hard to. I try to find a thing everyday when I wake up that makes me happy & that thing is what gets me through the day. However lately it’s getting harder & harder to find something & it scares me. Im scared if i dont find that one thing I’ll fall apart. I cope by listening to music & writing poems, but I just feel lost & alone, despite all the people I have around me.