Having hard time right now , please h... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Having hard time right now , please help me out guys ? I need ur advices? Sometimes feel like I just wanna disappeared and gone forever .

ehh22 profile image
6 Replies

Hello all, I’ve been with my Long distance Bf for more than 3 years , we haven’t met in real life but plan to do it next year and get marry. I love him soo much, he was soo kind gentle , understanding, very supportive and caring person. But I hate my self soo much for hurting him over many times. Every time when I made mistakes he would always forgive me. So this week has been a rough week for me to the point where I wanna sleep and never or don’t wake up again. The problems was about $. When it comes to $ I feel little insecure about it even tho I know that he’s very trustworthy guy. He would sometimes asked me to get him new phone or asking for an investment etcs. I know hjs intentions were clear that he wasn’t a guy who took advantage of a girl like that but I still have some doubtful feelings when it comes to money . Because lots of scammers in this world . So, instead of telling him about my doubtful feelings I made many excuses each time and lied to him over times , he was feeling very hurting but still forgave me. So , yesterday as we were having a conversation, so this money issue came in and he said he was feeling uncomfortable with it.. he told me that I’ll give u one last and final chnace to tell me the truth , because he suspect me that I love money over him. He said if u wanna save our relationship, please tell the truth , I did revealed the truth about my doubtful feelings when it comes to $. Because I was afraid of being used. And he said from the last 3 years u spent with me , u have seen my passport photo, u know how what I like and dislike, u know how many habits I have , u know what kind of person I am, etcs. He said , it was his day for DIDNT make me understand who he was , he told me that “ u had a jewel but u didn’t know the value of jewel. “ I asked him would U still accept me ? He replied “ I wish I could go back to the old beautiful days and extend more time fix all errors mistakes . Whatever I had encountered difficulties I remembered u and I say to my self that with u everything will be fine. “ I asked again would u still accept and give me one last chance? His replied “ I wished again that I could go back to those old days etcs , it’s true that I was upset and disappointed from u , but everything was good , tonight my bed is shaking , first time in life I’m feeling weak , god please help me !” After that he disappeared . No response from him. I texted and called him but I didn’t get any replied . I was wondering if he still give me a chnace and accept me or does his answer means he was letting me go? Because there was something still stuck in my Brian that “if u wanna save our relationship tell the truth “ so now I’m left all alone , with heartbreak and I hate my self .. I hate my self soo much ..... I cried every night to sleep, I did not show any of my weakness to my family because I don’t wnana them to see me sad. I tried to be so strong at work place ,,,, whatever I remember him, I feel like crying but I was holding back my tears ... I cried alone in shower , and I cried alone in bed , even tho I have friends and family , I feel soo all alone . I realized that love is blind and that’s true. Everyday I woke up wishing to see his texts and calls but the more I expected the more feel hurts . I’m soo broken in to pieces . I hve never ever love someone soo much like him. My close friends encourages me to give him sometimes to think and space . Maybe he was hurt when I told him the truth . Please help me out. What should I do ? I feel like I wnana go to an isolated place cry alone and die alone . 😥😥😥

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ehh22
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6 Replies
Agora1 profile image
Agora1

ehh22, first it starts out asking for small things and then what he needs gets more costly. It's someone you have never met. Let me tell you scammers will stay as long as it takes to break another person down. There goal is in dollar signs not love. Be grateful that you didn't give in. x

Stay safe

ehh22 profile image
ehh22 in reply to Agora1

Thanks soo much dear.

Bird-67 profile image
Bird-67 in reply to ehh22

I agree with Agora1, you did the right thing in not handing over any money 👍

By him showing you his passport doesn’t prove anything.

Every time you feel the urge to contact him just come on here and talk to us.

Good luck xx

Lostjoy profile image
Lostjoy

Hi ehh22,

I agree with the other 2 here. Thank goodness you were smart enough to not give him

any money. Sorry you are hurting. It will take some time, but it will get easier. And yes come here and chat if you need company.

Take Care.

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54

Hi I totally agree with the others here. This man was obviously a scammer and only after your money. Trust your feelings as they were completely correct. If something seems wrong then it usually is. Thank goodness you didn't give him any money.

You would be better to concentrate on trying to meet people in real life rather than rely so much on the net.

Where was he from?..I had a long distant relationship..thought I met the.love of.my life...i had similar conversations like you did...Then I got this gut feeling though..something hit me hard and I got in a heavy depressive state for a year..I said to myself it must be because I'm far from this person and I need to be next to them..I thought love found it's way..nonetheless, I thought I got like this coz of love and the only way to heal was to be next to my partner..so out of nowhere I dropped everything and said I'm going,..I packed everything up , left my job, left my elderly parents, just literally got up and left everything behind and before I knew it I was on the plane going overseas, a 24hr flight across the world to my so called love of my life,my soulmate...well,..where do I start...The above replies are so true..and like Agora1 said.."Just be grateful that you didn't give in"...I wish you the very best.

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