Can finally sleep🤞🏽🙏🏽

[SimplyMe87]

I used to have problems sleeping, but lately (ever since i quit my meds), I can actually sleep pretty well. There are times when I become anxious and stay in my phone at night looking for for solutions for whatever is on my mind, but recently I’ve been able to go to sleep at a decent time and stay asleep. I honestly believe that I’m less anxious than normal. (I don’t wanna speak too soon or jinx myself) but if that’s the case, I’m really excited. My therapist keeps telling me, since I’ve hit rock bottom..the only way left to go is UP! I just pray that I continue to get better and also pray that anyone else who was/is in my situation or similar also gets/feels better. 🤞🏽🤞🏽💪🏽

[Hidden]

🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

[SimplyMe87 in reply to Hidden]

🙏🏽🙏🏽🙌🏽

[Hopeful-Tinkerbell]

Sometimes I think the meds are worse than the disease. I want to quit mine! I feel like I’m getting worse with meds not better! It’s just been so long I’m scared to wean off. I’ve become so dependent on them. I see people I know who start meds and sit and watch them go down hill. My friend was doing pretty good and her doctor put her on meds a month ago. Last night she started cutting herself which she has never done before. Now she is an inpatient care facility. My meds help me relax and I’m lazy. I’m just so tired physically and mentally. It’s awful. I am going to work on weaning off. I feel worse now than when I went to the doctor in the first place. I’m so happy (and envious) for you! Just take it slow! One day at a time. You got this chick!

[SimplyMe87 in reply to Hopeful-Tinkerbell]

Please don’t envy me. Trust me, I’m no better than you. & honestly I didn’t even ween, I stopped cold turkey bc I just wanted to quit and I’m too impatient, BUT I do NOT recommend that, especially if you’ve been on them for quite some time. I wouldn’t want anything to happen to you. I guess I felt like since i was very dependent on them, as well, that I wouldn’t be able to ween. Thankfully nothing bad happened to me, but I did read that stopping cold turkey is extremely dangerous. So be careful, regardless of how you decide to stop. I’m rooting for you, though..& really pray you will get off of those demonic meds. Lol..well they may not be to everyone, but I look at them as little demons. They made me do some bad things that the ‘sober’ me would NEVER do. I’m sure they may be helpful to some people though..so I’m just speaking for myself. If you honestly feel like you are worse now, I strongly suggest that you get off of them and just try to cope without anything. Everyone’s different but I honestly feel much better after stopping them. Although I did have to go through horrible withdrawals (which resulted because of me stopping cold turkey), I’m just glad to say that it seems like the worst part is over and I can live again. Good luck, sweets!! Prayers to you!😘

[Hopeful-Tinkerbell in reply to SimplyMe87]

I am going to work on quitting. Sometimes I don’t even realize how bad I am acting until after the fact. It starts with changing the things I can that make me an anxious mess but I’m determined. Personally I wouldn’t mind the escape of going inpatient for a couple weeks. Then when I’m off my meds I can demand my husband quit his dependence on alcohol. I don’t think he will choose me over alcohol but that’s okay too. I just want my mind clear so I can focus on my life. I’ve already wasted way too much time! I’ve got your back if you’ve got mine! It may take me a while but I have to do something. This life ain’t good for nobody! Going to get a good nights sleep after a much better day. Praying for another great day for us both tomorrow. ❤️

[SimplyMe87 in reply to Hopeful-Tinkerbell]

I understand where you’re coming from with having an alcoholic husband. My daughters father turned into a big time alcoholic not too long after we met..mainly while i was pregnant and even worse after she was born. He started to mistreat my autistic son who was only 5, turning 6 at the time.. and became abusive toward me when our daughter was only 1 month old. I immediately left. It’s crazy because I moved from PA to NC just to be with him and raise our family...but the day he lifted his hand to me and I seen how satisfying it was to him just to hurt me, I knew we had to leave. We had to sneak, because he told me he would kill me and I believed him. I started taking the meds more and more and they made me so numb, that I really felt like I could take our daughter to visit him and bring in the new year & maybe make it work (silly me). Well, even after months, he still stuck to his word and once he had me alone in a hotel rm, he strangled me. Luckily, someone heard the disturbance and called security who called the ambulance and got me and my baby to the hospital. He didn’t hurt our baby or even run off with her, like I thought he would..thank God. Being with someone who abuses anything, especially alcohol is hell. I pray your husband quits and chooses u over the addiction..but if he doesn’t, maybe it’s best. Keep your head up and good luck to you when it comes to everything going on in your life.

[Hopeful-Tinkerbell in reply to SimplyMe87]

He would never hit me. We’ve been together 18 years. He just drinks way too much and then gets grumpy and talks mean. He would have one chance if he did and he would be in jail to say the least but that won’t happen. I think there are things in our life that are so horrible but we learn. He isn’t worthy of love if he hurt you. I wish you knew that before he hurt you but we never do. My husband and I live like roommates at Best. He does his thing and I sit here alone. He says he loves me and wants to work things out but sometimes love just isn’t enough. I love everyone. You have to like them. Actions speak louder than words. Since then nothing’s changed. I’m changing. As able with my limitations. When I feel like I’m bringing my Best I can demand that he do the same. I’m not without fault. My depression and anxiety has caused me to completely shut down. Along with my physical limitations from a severe traumatic car accident. I can’t change him but I can change myself. He wants things to work out out by me cooking cleaning etc and him doing his thing and drinking. If I’m worthy of more then he better bring it. I’m going to try my best to be worthy of more. You met an evil man. Don’t let that stop you from meeting someone special. Just take it slow and truly get to know them. If things don’t work out for me I will never be with someone who drinks alcohol of any amount ever again. If I even try to be with someone at all. I want to be alone. If I’m alone then I am responsible for telling myself what to do and how to do it and no one else. Sounds nice to me. I’m already lonely but I’ve got my dog.

[SimplyMe87 in reply to Hopeful-Tinkerbell]

Well I thank God that you never had to suffer any physical abuse. I honestly never thought I’d be ‘that girl’. I used to always say how I would NEVER let anyone do that. Like you said, I didn’t know..but I’m proud to say that as soon as he showed his true colors, I was out of there. What’s crazy is it took him a little over a year to do that. I always thought he loved us and wanted to protect us. That’s what he always said and even seemed to show it. But the minute I moved my son and my pregnant self down there with him, he had it in his mind “Now that you’re having my baby, you’re my property and can’t go anywhere, EVER!”. Yea, okay!! I’m not THAT naive or desperate. I may not have completely knew my worth but I knew I was better than that. He is definitely evil. He’s in jail right now for the umpteenth time due to him just being stupid, as normal. I’m not interested in being in another relationship, anytime soon..but when I do, I’m definitely going to take it slow. I have 2 small children involved now. Can’t let them see mama hurting all the time. That’s y I’m trying to get this anxiety and depression under control b/c that’s what’s been making me ‘sad’ lately. I just want my children to see me as a strong, loving, caring woman who love them very much.

[Hopeful-Tinkerbell in reply to SimplyMe87]

They will too! We can’t stop things from happening to us it’s how we react and move on from it that matters! I’ve always dreamed of living alone. Of course then there is a little fear of course. I always say if this marriage ends I will find an old man that needs a live in caretaker. I’d have someone to talk to and hang out with but not the stress of a relationship. Finances are hard but if I could afford it I would live alone. If I wanted a pink couch then that’s what I would do! If I wanted to skip dinner I’d do that too. I could do anything I want. Less mess to clean. Everything. My husband said he’s not coming home tonight or tomorrow night. Again I practically do live alone. The difference is if I do get scared he’s here. I rarely do but that worries me. Also things I can’t do. Like oil change or lawn work. So I guess having a room mate isn’t so bad. That’s all he is. I’m just glad you got out when you did! You are a good mom. They are lucky to have you!

[SimplyMe87 in reply to Hopeful-Tinkerbell]

Thank you so much. You seem like such a wonderful person. Your husbanddoesn’t know how good he has it. “He who finds a wife, finds a good thing.” Proverbs18:22.

You do not deserve to be alone, unless that’s what you really want. You deserve someone who loves and cherishes you til death do you part. You deserve to be happy. I truly hope you find that one day.

[Hopeful-Tinkerbell in reply to SimplyMe87]

I want to be alone a while. I want a pink couch. Lol If I could afford it I probably would be but disability leaves me below the poverty level. I want a cute townhouse or apartment where I have very little outside maintenance and people that can come and fix stuff for me. I want to only clean up after myself. I barely make messes and live in my pajamas unless I have to go somewhere. Just me and my dog. I would like a small townhouse so I could have a little fenced yard for my Tater Tot and won’t have to walk her unless I want to. The problem is I can’t afford it. If I did it would probably be a horrible place I wouldn’t feel safe in alone. I want to live in a neighborhood where I might be able to make a friend. I live by a lake in the middle of nowhere now. It’s nice but lonely. It’s hard to meet people too. I spoiled my miracle baby so much that I forgot to make a life for myself. Then they left. He’s back now but never here. If he is he’s in his room that he doesn’t clean. He’s 23. I’ve picked up after him long enough too! I spoiledhim too much. Maybe one day it may be nice to not be alone and meet someone but I married before I left my parents house. I want to experience life on my own a while if things don’t work out. I’m serious about the hot pink couch. Although I probably couldn’t afford it. Maybe I should play the lotto! Lol. I really want one of those tiny houses. That’s my dream house. With a small fenced area for my baby Tater Tot. I wouldn’t need to win a lot. Just enough for a tiny house and a pink couch! Maybe one day. The older I get the more people get on my nerves. Not here!!! Just in my family mostly. I’m tired!

[quieturban]

I like the herbal teas. Specifically the chamomile tea helps to relax you from stress and anxiety. Glad you're getting some sleep. I have trouble sleeping sometimes too.

[SimplyMe87 in reply to quieturban]

Yes. I need to get some more tea. One in particular that works great is something called ‘SleepyTime Tea’, but i would get the ‘Extra SleepyTime Tea’. I believe it has chamomile in it, also. Will definitely be getting some soon, just to help relax. Thank you ❤️