So before I ask my question let me say up front that most nights I’m lucky to get 6.5 hours of sleep and sadly that isn’t likely to change. This is something I’ve dealt with for years and seems like it’s only recently become a major issue.
Does anyone have any suggestions for things I could try to help me sleep better at night?
I’ve been having problems sleeping the last month or so. I wake up after a few hours and either have problems falling back asleep or if I do I don’t feel like I’m getting any rest after I do and I wake up feeling worse than when I went to sleep.
Here are some things I’ve tried over the years:
Ambien - works but I don’t get to sleep enough to safely take it without risking oversleeping.
Melatonin - doesn’t seem to help me fall or stay asleep but makes me feel groggy in the morning. It’s also harder to get out of bed.
Trazadone - better than melatonin but with the same problems
Sleep “hypnosis”/meditation - I find these videos-audio recordings can help me relax my mind and fall asleep but doesn’t help me stay asleep or feel any more rested.
Exercise - I haven’t been to the gym in the last week and a half due to lack of time and my knees kind of hurting but I was exercising when this started so I’m not getting my hopes up for when I start getting back into it.
I’m sure there’s more I can’t remember in my exhausted haze but I’ve been suggested sleepy time tea. I keep forgetting I have it though now that I’ve bought it.
Does anyone have any suggestions of things I could try?
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faulhallen
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Hiya! I was wondering how you were doing lately. Anyway it sounds like you're doing all the right things. I'll add that benadryl can make you sleepy too. For me I've found if I can't fall asleep I'll move to a different location (couch) and turn on the TV and eventually I'll nod off again. But it usually takes 2 hours which sucks.
Thank you 😊. It’s been a bit rough this week because I’ve felt so exhausted. It’s made my emotions pretty wild and uncontrollable at times but I’m doing better. There have been some frustrating changes in the schedule of when I planned to move out but I think I’m handling it better than I have previous delays. I have an idea for a post I was going to make when I had time that was a combination of life update and positive message but I can go into detail whenever. I just need to get started on my morning and get my kids taken care of so I don’t have time to say everything right now. How have you been doing?
I'm sorry about the challenges with finding a new place/sleep but I'm glad you're taking things in stride!
I'm ok, although my energy level has been much lower the past 5 days or so and it's been hard to concentrate at work, let alone think about my self improvement goals. It seems like once my anxiety subsides I'm just exhausted and unproductive. But hopefully today will be better.
Yes I have suggestions- I am a professional insomniac. Not suffering at all. I used to suffer.
First, cast away any notions you have about sleeplessness. They are all false. Seriously, anything you've read or heard from people about how "not getting enough sleep is harmful", and "lack of sleep can lead to worsening mental health issues", "It raises cortisol levels which can lead to problems" etc etc... it's all complete bunk. Start looking at it this way:
- In times of great stress, people go for days without sleeping (ie wartime, catastrophes) and the body is meant to handle that as part of life
- I works in healthcare and we often go for days without sleeping- on call, back to back shifts, no one shows up so you do a double, etc...
-New moms (and dads!) hardly sleep at all. They are up all night with crying babies, feeding every 2-3 hours, etc
- Sleeplessness is common, harmless, nothing whatsoever to be concerned about.
Insomnia can result from several things- chronic pain, prostate problems in men (and thus peeing all night), etc but anxiety based insomnia is the most common type. You seem to have anxiety based insomnia. Which responds to..... ignoring it and turning it into a big nothing in your mind. Then you'll start sleeping better. But you won't care, because you will have completely changed your attitude towards sleep.
I sleep very well these days- only 5-6 hours a night but that's because I'm too busy to sleep more. I'm fiine. When I have something bothering me I might have a bout of insomnia, but it's mild and I don't care. I get up and do things. When my daughter has occasional insomnia, we get up together and use that time to do fun things- bake, draw, plan a trip, write cards, etc.
Do sleep hygiene (see link below) but don't expect it to work miracles. It all helps, but "NOTHING" works. That's a GOOD thing. Turning it into a great big nothing actually WORKS. Here's a sleep hygiene link:
I tell my friends and family when they are having trouble sleeping: "call me! I'll come over and we'll play cards!" They reply, "no I don't want to disturb your sleep!" to which I say, "oh please- sleep is so overrated. I'd rather be up. It's good to be up! We'll get some stuff done " and this calms them down and helps them start thinking about sleep differently. And then, when they finally grasp this, of course not just from my attitude towards it, but also from therapy, others, etc... they magically start to sleep better zzzzzzz
One of my children used to wake up really early when they were very young.
I used to try to snooze while keeping an ear open to hear if she was ok and feel sleep deprived, like I’d been robbed of a couple of hours of sleep. Then I’d be grumpy.
A friend told me she just got up with hers when they did that. So I started doing that too.
It was great, we had a nice quiet time together, I got stuff done.
Instead of feeling grumpy that I’d lost sleep, I’d feel delighted that I’d gained a productive few hours. (This despite having just the same amount of sleep)
Thank you for asking, things are looking positive here. A few bumps in the road but lots of good signs.
I’m keeping my fingers crossed as I say this of course because I’m only observing from the outside, I don’t actually know how it us from my son’s perspective.
Thank you. Where this is contrary to nearly everything you tend to hear, I found myself thinking you could be 125% right with what you’ve said. When I was a lot younger I used to wake up at around 4:30 just naturally on weekends. I never fought it I just got up and did whatever no matter how much I slept. The same was true even if I used an alarm during the week. It feels entirely like I only started having problems being exhausted all the time once I started worrying about sleeping and being exhausted all the time. Even when my kids were babies and I barely slept it never got to me as bad as it has lately.
Thank you so much for your insight. I’m definitely going to try and change my attitude towards sleeping. I could always use a couple extra hours to myself or with my children as well. 😄. I need to get up and make sure my kids are taken care of but I will definitely look at that link later! Thank you again!
I realise this is an old(ish) post but hadn’t seen it until the reply below. I’d just like to say that as much as I instinctively wanted to disagree with some of your points, I actually think your approach is spot on.
It’s so easy to get into that downwards spiral of dreading going to bed, not sleeping well, waking up with (whatever) anxiety / pain and then it confirms why you were dreading it — rinse, repeat. I guess your approach is saying — forget about all of the sleep issues that are caused by worrying about it and accept that your body will naturally sleep when it needs to.
As much as it is easier said than done (we all know that, right?), it still resonates with me. Although I guess knowing it and doing it...
Next time I can’t sleep (so, tonight...) I will just not care. 🙏🏻
Yes! Practice that way of thinking. 😀 It is so ingrained in me now but at first I had to practice and repeat mantras.
One other supporting fact I forgot: when we finally DO sleep, even if it’s for just a couple of hours, that sleep is very restorative- the body/mind knows it needs to make up for lost time and throws us into deep sleep cycles quickly. Our bodies know how to handle this! It’s ok not to sleep well - no need to worry about it👍🏻
I’m thinking practice is the key word. As opposed to ‘just do it’!
It’s an interesting point though, how possible is it to divert the mind away from those negative thoughts, whether that be sleep related or whatever else may trouble you? I guess that’s the point of CBT (didn’t do it for me, but then I was too much of a cynic I think), and lots of people find comfort from that approach.
hey there. I had similar problems. I started using some natural pills that have been quite effective. The best idea is to find those that do not give you that weak and unwell feeling when you wake up.
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" and this calms them down and helps them start thinking about sleep differently. And then, when they finally grasp this, of course not just from my attitude towards it, but also from therapy, others, etc... they magically start to sleep better zzzzzzz
Trouble sleeping. 
I want my brain back ugh
Having trouble sleeping :( 
Melatonin for sleeping
