On the road

[Brighter]

Feels like I'm on the road to feeling better. Sometimes people joke and I sincerely laugh at them. Sometimes I watch TV and sincerely get excited. Sometimes I'm driving to work and sincerely feel calm. Sometimes I'm in front of my students and sincerely feel energetic to teach.

Most of the time I'm questioning myself. Am I happy? Am I sad? Am I anxious? A lot of the time I'm anxious.

Anyone else feel like this sometimes? I just started taking fluoxetine after stopping for 2.5 months. Felt like I was starting all over again with the panic attacks and depressed state. Finally starting to feel a little relief, but sometimes it's still difficult.

[Rox92]

I am taking citalopram for anxiety. And I had a bad week last week but a little better since Saturday. And getting relief in the evenings. I've been on them for 4 weeks.

How long have you been on them?

[Brighter in reply to Rox92]

I think I've been back on them for about 5 weeks. Maybe a bit more. Glad you're feeling a little better.

[Agora1]

Hi Brighter, It sounds like you are starting to break through the cloud that has been looming over your head. Being able to laugh again, to feel emotions of happiness, calmness and being energetic are all signs pointing in the right direction.

When you were off fluoxetine for 2.5 months, I could have almost guaranteed you would be feeling better after you went through the withdrawal effects of the drug. After coming down off any medication it still takes time for the med to be out of your body as well as your brain to re-adjust to there being no medication to allow for the chemical imbalance. It will now be up to your brain to manufacture the chemical naturally and this takes some time. It's called the healing period for your brain. I know because I went through that myself after getting off benzo medications. Once the brain healed, anxiety left. Continued success in going forward.

[Brighter in reply to Agora1]

Yeah when I stopped taking them, I had about a couple weeks where I just felt a little anxious and disinterested in things, but then getting really good. I thought I was back to my old self until I had a full on panic attack early October followed by a week of anxiety and depression. I read that it can take a while for the meds to leave your system so I figured maybe my brain was still running on whatever was left and then went into shock or something.

[Agora1 in reply to Brighter]

Yes, not shock but if you can picture your brain having a temper tantrum over his favorite med being cut off, that would kind of explain why it gave you one more try. It's okay that your doctor put you back on, ii is not a defeat by any means. You have a job that needs your full attention. While on the medication make sure you look for alternatives in reducing anxiety and stress. Taking some "me" time in the evening can benefit you in many ways through the night as well as the next day. Using acceptance for the symptoms you are feeling as just being a reaction to what you are thinking. It is not life threatening, it is not harmful. Once you learn to accept this concept of Anxiety being nothing more than lies, your Mind/Body will adjust to that positive thought and the negative thinking will soon leave. I use deep breathing as my "go to" every day all day and evening long. It helps keep a calm peace over me. People say I'm laid back, my daily medication is deep breathing.

We're here on the forum to share our own experiences anytime you need a pick me upper to get through a hard day or night. You're getting there, I can sense it.

Take care, My best to you Agora1

[Ashlan]

Yeah I completely agree. I'm anxious or depressed, and then two hours later I'm genuinely laughing at something. The brain is a fickle being. How long has it been since you restarted the fluoxetine? After being off for 2.5 months, it's safe to say it was completely out of your system. Unfortunately, now you have to wait the 4 weeks or so for it to build back up in your system. - Your friendly neighborhood pharmacist

[Brighter in reply to Ashlan]

It's been about 6 weeks. When I took them the first time wasn't really until the 6 month mark that I really started to feel good. I was on them for almost 2 years then tapered off and was completely off for 2.5 months before the panic attack.

[Mayte]

If you are feeling anxious or excited or proud, let yourself FEEL that emotion. Even though it can be scary to expose ourselves to our strongest emotions, most emotions don’t last longer than 90 seconds. What you’ll probably find is that if you can sit still with a strong emotion and let yourself feel it, even the worst emotional pain rises, crests, breaks, and recedes like a wave on the surf.Feeling our emotions then understanding our feelings can be quite a daunting task at first as there are many reasons as to why we are blocked or numb. Emotions, such as fear and shame can be the reason we hide from our feelings.