Anxiety and Depression Support

Lost!

Hi guys. I've only recently suffered with bad anxiety and severe stress. My partner and I went abroad about 2 and a half weeks ago. Since being there and getting back I have been having terrible anxiety. Two panic attacks and haven't really been the same since. Like I'm still frightened to talk about it because it takes me back there and to how I was feeling. Without knowing me or me giving much detail prescribed me 10mg ciltalopram because he said this would help with the anxiety. I wasn't depressed I was happy before this.

It's been like a bit of a whirlwind really. How I went from being myself to feeling really confused and lost really.

I am only on day 10 of the meds but I feel really low and scared that I'll never get back to my old self.

Has anyone had any experience of this?

I feel like the holiday has broke me!

Please I need reassurance!

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Did anything happen while you were away or have you been feeling like you are moving too fast in the relationship or anything like that? Where did you go? Was there a trigger for it?

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Thanks for reply.

No nothing happened, me and my partner were/ are very happy together. I thought that this trip would be a good break for a few days. We went to Venice.

I think the trigger was the total loss of control. It's not like we could have got in the car and drove home. My only way home was to get back on a plane and it terrified me! To the point where it ruined our holiday because I was so anxious. I couldn't eat or sleep properly for two days.

I thought it would have all gone away when we got home but it didn't. And now I'm a Matter of two and a half weeks my worlds been turned upside down and I'm taking anti depressants. Xx

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Was it the first time you’d been abroad? Or maybe just the situation as you say that for whatever reason the lack of control triggered that in you. I had the same when I went diving- I’ve never had a panic attack and then when I did that I hated it so much that from then on that feeling was stirred in me and then it started to manifest in normal life.

I suppose once you feel something for whatever reason it can stay with you until you address it. Perhaps it would help to really think about the fact that you are home and safe. And you don’t have to go again. Or go anywhere you don’t want. Or find a safe space and mediate there? I love headspace the app it’s so calming and lets you just breathe and learn to control the thoughts.

Have you tried headspace or therapy or did the docs just put you on anti depressants? I’ve been amazed by how mich headspace works just by doing 20 mins a day- helps control your thoughts which is really nice and it makes you calm and free.

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You’re ok though! You’re safe and you have time to heal and just breathe and you’ll work on it and improve :)

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Yes it was my first time. I'm 25 and I have two children so it was a big deal for me. But I thought if I don't do it I'll never know. And I guess I felt guilty because my partner had spent a lot of money. Even though he is the most laid back and understanding person. He told me we didn't have to get on the plane. But I didn't know I'd have this fear.

I started hypnotherapy two days ago next session next week. I will be having 6 of these.

I have downloaded the app headspace so I will give that a go tomorrow.

The mornings are usually the hardest for me.

The meds have taken the edge off slightly but they have made me feel so low. But day 11 tomorrow and today has been more positive so fingers crossed!

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That’s totally understandable then! Flying can be super scary as it is- I have travelled many times but the older I get the more I hate flying, there are so many things you might worry about. And I am sure leaving your kids was hard too and you are putting unecessary pressure on yourself that you let your partner down. It seems like all these things got overwhelming which is completely normal and I don’t think you should feel bad about.

It’s great that you are getting therapy and I’m sure if you try not to blame yourself it will improve. Give headspace a go- at first I thought ‘this is silly’ and wouldn’t do much, but if you stick with it (if you get time with your kids I am sure you are busy!) it gradually gives you the ability to just chill and breathe and you’ll hopefully be able to accept the thoughts and put them from your mind. You are much more than just those thoughts!

Good luck! I think you’re doing great anyway to be focusing on it and I’m sure soon you’ll feel better.

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Also sounds like you have a great family so take your time and feel better :) xxx

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Thank you. Feeling alot more positive now ☺️

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Ah I’m glad! I really think it’s not as unnatural as you think, probably you are just a great Mum Who didn’t like leaving the kids and it was a bigger deal than you thought! But that’s cool I mean some people don’t like to travel and that’s just fine- I love it but my sister likes to be home :) don’t be so hard on youself I’m sure with time and some care you’ll be great. And it’s lovely you have a nice partner so you aren’t alone.

Maybe no pizza for now? Haha 😁🙄

Good luck! Take care x

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That sounds like quite an adventure! I would try to remember good things about the trip. You're right the way home is on a plane. Are you afraid of flying- could that have been it? Have you tried something natural like walking in nature or yoga? It always knocks me out ( that is just me) when a medical person right away prescribes meds right away without knowing the whole person. Perhaps it's a symptom of this rushed society we live in- I don't know. At any rate I hope that you can also visualize the beautiful scenery there. I know people who have been there, and they say it's magical.

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Hi I was away on holidays with my partner in February and my anxiety was high due to me being afraid of flying etc and it left me drained and exhausted for weeks after being on high alert for the four days I was away ...that fear for me was will I ever come home to my happy place I know it sounds ridiculous to some people but that was my anxiety ...I soon recovered but I do fear going away again ...sending love to you x

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Thank you for replying.

Another person that can relate.

How did you overcome this? Xx

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Hi well my safe place that comforts me is my home . I have been suffering from anxiety for 2 years and have had cbt therapy etc and I read a lot of self help books ...it just took time for me to recover from hoilday and settle back into routine . Sometimes when I am out of routine it makes me more anxious . I also have 2 children and I worry about them when I go away and if I will make it back to them xx

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Do you think that meds were the wrong thing? Xx

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No not at all I have tried 3 different anti depressants over the last 2years and found no help in them ... my therapy helped me as she helped me understand my anxiety and how to live with it and not fight it as that's what makes us worse ..it's good to talk to someone

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Hopefully my therapy will help and then I can come off the antidepressants. You're very brave going away when you're anxious xx

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Yea we're still young and need to see the world I'm 25 as well ... try your best your doing everything you can that's what I tell myself ...

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It might sound wierd but studies have indicated that flying is safer than driving .! At least planes are not on the road while drivers are talking on cell phones!

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Rox, yes, this same thing happened to me. My husband and I went out to Montana. I'm a city girl and the remoteness and loneliness of it all, and the huge mountains made me feel very alone and scared. Started having terrible anxiety out there and was afraid I'd never get back. Then suffered bad anxiety once I finally did get home. Stay on the meds. Your nervous system is sensitized. Your amygdala will eventually get back to normal. Takes time, patience and encouragement from people who love you, but don't always understand. You may want to talk to a therapist for a little while too. I am working with a breathing machine called a resperate and this is very calming. Right now I'm getting ready to get on a plane to go to FL. I have angst, but I know I'll be ok. Stay strong and keep your chin up. If you need to talk I am here for you. JC

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Wow it's so good to talk to people that have experienced the same thing. Especially because you feel so alone! Thank you for replying.

Did you get prescribed meds?

I had a hypnotherapy session in the week and have another one on Tuesday. I want to try everything I can to not let this beat me.

How did you learn to control your anxiety? Xxx

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Hi Rox, controlling is a hard process. You have to tell yourself that nothing bad is going to happen to you, and you have to keep pushing through. DOn't stop living your normal life. I know it's hard, but just keep the mantra going, nothing bad is going to happen to you and you're not going to feel this way forever. In fact, if not yet, you'll probably soon have moments during the day when you feel like your old self. Yes, I am on medication (50 mgs.. Of pristiq) and I do talk therapy. Hang tough!!!!

JC

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Meds. take time to work and ten days is not a long time. Give it more time and if things don't improve, see your doctor again. It also takes time to recover from anxiety and panic. You might want to consider seeing a therapist, trying cognitive behaviour therapy, and checking out self-help online tools (www.anxietybc.com). You will get better...be patient and kind with yourself.

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Did something stressful happen there?

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