Telling People Lies: So, I'm 31 and I... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Telling People Lies

Look4ward profile image
9 Replies

So, I'm 31 and I still go to community college. People outside of school ask me what I've been up to. To not feel awkward, I just tell them I've been to an art school but couldn't afford it so had to end up going to community college. The truth is, I've never been to art school or a university. I'm currently working on it right now...and have been working on it. It's just embarrassing to tell people the truth about my progress in life. I'm not married, am single and don't have kids and no degree. I feel like things are going all downhill from here. I feel alone. Only my close friends and family know the truth.

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Look4ward profile image
Look4ward
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9 Replies

You don't have to disclose to others anything you're uncomfortable with and you definitely don't have to feel bad about it either. Society makes it sesm like everyone should go to college right out of high school, graduate by 22, get a good job, family, etc. but life is way more complicated than that and in a lot of ways you're probably doing better than many people. I knew many students older than you when I went to community college. No matter where you are in life you can always move forward and it doesn't matter what that looks like to other people

Look4ward profile image
Look4ward in reply to

Thank you, my friend. This really helps!

Hi I completely agree with LowkeyLoki. I never married or had kids either but I did have a very good social life and did work all my life. You only need to talk about things you want to and if anyone judges you then it says more about them than about you.

You have no need to feel a failure in any way shape or form. Life is for you to do with what you please and you are not answerable to anybody expect yourself. Ok? xx

Look4ward profile image
Look4ward in reply to

I got it! :) Thank you so much for the reinsurance. It's always nice to read this!

Windy101 profile image
Windy101

I went to community college for a semester in my 50s. I had great instructors and loved the diversity there. It helped me build a portfolio to get into a better school. Community college is one of the best kept secrets in education - it's affordable, high quality, and usually the credits transfer to other schools. You are making a smart choice and have nothing to be ashamed of. This is YOU, the real you. If that's not good enough for some people, does it really matter? Why do judgmental people matter so much?

By the way, I had degrees before enfolling in CC. At my age, I just needed to brush up and update my skills. The people I met there were every bit as smart as those at universities. Chin up, sweetie, you're going great.

Windy101 profile image
Windy101

Also, 31 is young! I had my daughter at age 31. It sounds corny, but most of your life is ahead of you, I promise. Our culture puts pressure on women to be this and that, and if you're at all different, then there must be something wrong with you. You walk your own path and hold your head high. There is not a thing wrong with being unmarried and not having children.

cb934586 profile image
cb934586

I am 50 and dont have a job or children. I totally regret my life. An wondering if you have a partner and a plan to get married if that's what you want. In my 30s I thought I had all the time in the world but that's not true.

one-love profile image
one-love

Gods got a great plan for your life look at the Bible for example Noah was a drunk, David adultery, Moses killed someone all of these individuals had great flaws and you would think they were the most unlikely people to use but Jesus looked past all of that and seen great potential in all of them and used them for his glory and he will do the same for you. Just ask him pray about what he wants for your life and listen. So Lift your head up stand proud and don't be embarrassed because you are a child of the king this world is full of people that want to tear you down rather then build you up. You just have to keep looking forward towards your goal and don't get distracted by individuals you will probably never see again once you finish school.

Doug1847 profile image
Doug1847

You have nothing to be embarrassed about. If someone looks down on you for the reasons you mentioned, then you don't need those people in your life.

Do what you want to do and be happy. College isn't all it's cracked up to be. I went to a university and got 2 degrees. Never did a damn thing with either of them. I was happy working at a bookstore where I got a job while working in school.

I get looked down upon now because I'm a stay at home dad. People think it's not normal. Granted, I work from home and make more now putting in 10-15 hours a week than I ever did in the 40 hour a week "real" jobs I had.

Live your life, do what makes you happy. Never be embarrassed. The singer for hardcore band H2O, Toby Morse has an organization called One Life, One Chance and I am a firm believer in that.

Hold your head, try your best, never be afraid to try.

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