So I've been dealing with anxiety and epression for a while now and I'm learning to deal with my anxiety first but my depression thoguhts scare me sometimes and that feed off into my anxiety so it's basically a never ending cycle. My thoughts are now consisting of that one day I'm gonna kill my self. Let me reassure you that I DO NOT WANT TO KILL MYSELF AT ALL. But my thoguhts make think that I'll never get through this and that one day it's gonna be too unbearable and I won't be able to handle it. Is it normal to think this way? Everytime I try to think "no I won't because I know I'll make it out alive" my brain argues back think that "no you won't you're gonna kill yourself" basically intrusive thoughts I guess. Let me rephrase again I do not ever want to kill myself!! I want to live!! Even if it means living with this for the rest of my life. I would rather live a life than not live somewhat of a life. Even if it were to be as shitty as a life like this. Also whenever I feel relaxed or okay my brain thinks "are you really relaxed? Don't relax when you're actually never gonna feel that good forever you're always gonna be depressed". It feels weird to feel okay since I'm used to being depressed and anxious everyday.