Where to start I've suffered from spells of depression since a teenager when I was bullied quite a bit and went through a suicidal time. My parents got me help and I got through it.
Over the last 10 months ive gotten into a new relationship who I thought was the love of my life and the feeling was mutual.
Over the last 3-4 months the depression has hit hard and when I think about why I've no idea, a few friendships broke down which obviously effected me and had arguments with my partner usually over something or nothing when drunk and then the dark times would hit, I've tried to commit suicide three times but it's not that I want to die I'm trying to get attention from my partner as I've not been able to open up about it. Wrong I know but I just wanted the pain to stop.
He's tried his hardest to stay but says I need to get help, in one breath it's breaking his heart the next he's being nasty calling me selfish to want to do this to him, my family and friends. I'm getting help now talking to a therapist but it's killing me him not being here to help me through. The one person I thought I could count on for anything has just left me when I need him the most, why??
I know he's hurting and maybe hasn't got an idea how to deal with it, is it normal for people to shut you out at times like this?
I've got a friend who I've spoken to about everything and she's helping me day by day. But I feel like I'm burdening her and I'm so up and down and crying all the time I just need my partner back.
Any advice right now would be appreciated.
Written by
Lynsey123
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Its awful what your your bf has done to you but they say you find out who really loves you in your darkest times. You will get over this and meet someone who loves you for your good times and bad times. If hes not willing to stay and help you then hes not worth your time and love. I was bullied alot as a child and then on to collage and in work.....i still do now by family and that know me.....i dont think they realise the damage it does to your soul cos mine is broken. X
If he did truly care for you it would seem that he could look past the mental issues you are having and see the "real" you that is inside all the time. It is tough for a partner to deal with mental issues and in some ways they take on the feelings of the partner. He may not understand enough that is why he is pushing back because he doesnt want to deal with depression himself. It is too bad because you sound like a great loving person. The trick is to manage this portion of your life, seek professional help and you will find love. I hope this helps. I have been dealing with mental issues and my wife has stuck with me through it all. It is tough for her but she knows the real me deep down inside just waiting to come back out!
I am so sorry about what happened to you. I was in a similar situation not too long ago. My bf dumped me asking me to never contact him again. First I did not know why. After a few months I found that he was using a fake id and writing in social forums about the breakup, how draining it was for him to handle a depressed gf. He was advising others to stay at arms length from depressed to prevent oneself from getting depressed. I was heart broken and felt completely betrayed. Besides abandoning me when I needed him the most, he went around trash talking my condition. I thought he was the love of my life. I have since then been unable to socialize, or keep any friends' phone numbers in my phone. I panic when I get calls or text.
Since then, I have cut off everything and anything that reminded me of him. I am trying to keep myself busy reading books, watching media that is light, being in company of people I absolutely trust and praying to God. It has been helping me. I have forgiven him for the betrayal. Life is unfair. No matter how careful we are and how conscientious we are, some times we get people wrong.
I hope you could do the same to put this person and the memories behind and come out stronger. My best wishes.
I'm really sorry honey. He doesn't deserve you anyway if he's going to leave you that easily. I know how hard it is for your guy to leave you just because you have issues. It'll get better
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