Hi all. I don't know where to begin. I'm looking for help, and I'm not really sure how to find it. I need to talk to a professional in person. I think I've figured out that much. I'm out of control. What's going on in my head is causing me to spiral downwards, and it's going to hurt everyone else around me. I have a lot of people counting on me, and the thought of that actually makes things worse.
The (what I assume is) depression has crippled me. It's affecting my work, my relationships, and worst of all, my children.
I'm tired. Tired of feeling nothing one day, then hopeless the next. I'm tired of putting on the mask for everyone when I've felt dead inside for who knows how long. I'm tired of not being able to wrap my head around this, and figure it out. I can't clearly articulate what's going on in my own.head, which of course, makes it worse.
I feel alone, but that's my fault. I feel ashamed of myself, embarrassed. I find it impossible to talk to friends and family. I'm at a crossroads, and I'm trying desperately to make decisions that are healthy for my daughters and myself.