Love is gone.

[Lovequestion]

I have depression, anxiety and PTSD. My feelings often go to this really dark place. Some of my depression is justifyied yet somehow I always blame myself. The fact that my mother, who is suppose to love you rejected me at the time of her death. If she could feel this way, I could not be lovable. My mother was a good women. I need to be available for my daughter who really needs me. She is twenty two, she too has been effected by my mental illness. I need to buck up as some would say. Thank you for reading.

[Hidden]

My mother and father wasnt the idea parents either growing up with them was hard but with my kids i took the mistakes of my parents and try not to do the same to my kids i try to be a good dad im not perfect but they will see later how much you triied for them if you need a friendim here good luck

[Lovequestion in reply to Hidden]

Thank you, I like you hope to be a good dad. That is an endearing quality. That is positive thinking. One of my best coping skills. I do need a friend and it goes both ways. I may not have answers but I am a good listener.

[Hidden in reply to Lovequestion]

Between the 2 of us im sure we can make it just remember you have me to lean on when you need it

[Lovequestion in reply to Hidden]

Thank you, I appreciate that you are here

[BonnieSue]

You seem available to your daughter to me. Are you sometimes not available to her? That would seem possible since you have depression and that is also reasonable due to this depression. It doesn't mean you are purposely unavailable to your daughter but are not well at times just as some other fathers are not well at times. You aren't necessarily in control of these times the same way other fathers aren't in control of their illnesses. You can express your sorrow that you don't have total control over your health problems and your desire to be ever available to your daughter and your regrets that this isn't possible. Make sure she knows how profoundly you love her at all times, sick or not sick.

[Lovequestion]

Hi, my name is Stephanie. I too have several diagnosis. PTSD, Depression my whole life, and anxiety. I am a veteran, so I get my treatment there. I use to be very close with my mom for years. Right before she died, she did not want to see me because I protected my daughter from my brother. I got to her bed one hour before her death. She was unable to communicate. After that I rejected my brother and have no remorse about that. He hurt my daughter in a way I could never forgive. So one that day, I lost all my family. I felt like I must be totally unlovable. My daughter is 23 and in college so she needs me ( even though I am ill). She is all that I have left and I have to be available since there was a time in her life I was not. The one thing I learned is everyday I have to love my self. It is the messages we tell our self that hurt us. I hope you can love yourself and let others love into your heart. I thank you for your post, it allowed me to feel my feelings about my mom who was also a good women.

[Lovequestion in reply to Lovequestion]

I just realized that I answered my own question. No wonder I related so much. 🤗