Am I the only one?

Hi, my name is Katlyn and I'm new to this online community. I have had crippling anxiety and depression for as long as I can remember. I started taking medication to help my problems about 4 months ago, and it was great for a little while, but it's starting to not help anymore. The amount of thoughts that run through my mind every minute are enough to drive you crazy. I have, on average, about three panic attacks a day, and they have gotten so bad lately that I have started almost passing out. My depression is to the point where I don't feel the desire to do anything at all anymore. If it weren't for my husband trying to give me motivation and helping me get through the day, I don't know if I would ever get out of bed. I do also have thoughts of suicide on a regular basis, but I try to suppress them because I don't want my thoughts to hurt the people I love. My anxiety and depression have gotten so bad that I can't sleep anymore, and if I do fall asleep at any point, I have continuous nightmares.

I feel like I am a bother to everyone around me, and that I am a freak for having as many issues as I do, and having to take medication on a daily basis just so that I can somewhat function.

I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me, and I don't want attention. I just want to know that I am not the only person in this whole big world to struggle as hard as I do to get through the day.

Any advice is welcome as well.

Thank you to everyone who may take time to read this.

11 Replies

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  • Have you talked to your doctor about increasing the dosage of your medicine or adding on to your medicine? I have had all of those feelings as well. I promise you are not a freak or a bother to anyone. Those feelings are just the anxiety talking. Stay strong! You are a fighter and you are not alone!

    I have xanax prescribed with my Prozac and it helps a lot when I am having rough attacks. I also would recommend kava kava tea. It's very relaxing.

    If you ever feel alone or need to talk to someone who understands what you are going through or just need to vent you can message me on here!

  • You are not alone Katlyn. I get days like you just the same. Many others do too. You will get good help and advice on here. Wonderful people who take time to try and help and listen to you. Hope your feeling better soon . Kate x

  • Hi And welcome Katlyn,

    First of all never be ashamed of having anxiety/depression because it is not your fault. Just like someone with a broken leg should not be ashamed. Nor should you feel bad for having to take medication to function. The same as you would not judge someone for taking medication for diabetes or another illness.

    It sounds like you are able to get through the day even with the severe anxiety/depression and you should be proud of that.

    The people who truly love you do not and will not consider you a bother, if anything they would be upset if you didn't reach out for help.

    It sounds like your symptoms are pretty sever, I would suggest talking to your psychiatrist about possibly increasing your dose or adding a medication. However, I believe medication is only one tool in the toolbox people with anxiety/depression need. Try adding some other "tools". Some examples include: talk therapy with a psychologist/counseler/social worker, group therapy or in person support groups, meditation, relaxation techniques, joining an intensive anxiety treatment program, reading books or online materials on coping with anxiety/depression.

  • You are not alone. I have really bad anxiety and depression as well...along with bipolar disorder and social anxiety. I hate it and badly it affects my life. I take effexor, ability, lamotragine, and (trazadone to help me sleep at night). I have found that the medication is not working as well as it use to. I feel like my body may be building a tolerance to it. I might need to have my doses increased. I suggest therapy or counseling as well, along with excersize. Excersize really helps, although I hate it, I have to do it for my mental health. Having a support group is also good. I suggest a support group of women, could be 2 or 3. If you have more in your group, even better. That is soooooo awesome your husband is supportive and encouraging. High-five to him. You're not alone, you're not a weirdo or a freak for suffering with these conditions. If you are..then I am too.. and we can be weirdo, freaks together. It will get better, it might be like a roller coaster ride, but it will get better. We just have to maintain self-care and do all the necessary things to help ourselves.

  • I totally understand where you're coming from. I hate that mental illness is something that we are made to feel like we do alone. I feel like everyday I am fighting an uphill battle and that I'm doing it alone. When I finally decide to open up to someone about my anxiety and depression they don't truly understand and the next time that I get in a funk they run away or they say "oh, you'll get out of your funk soon." I wish it was that easy. I am here if you ever need or want someone to talk to. Know that you aren't fighting this alone.

  • Those are my feeling​s exactly. Everyone thinks it will just go away, which would be totally great, but it doesn't work that way. Some days are better than others, but every day is a struggle. I'm here if you need to talk too. Everyone on here is really helping me not feel so alone anymore.

  • Thanks Katyln. After several months of debating I finally created my account and I really hope that I can find the support. Glad that I've found someone already that I can relate to. We can support one another. :)

  • Yeah, my husband made me do this, but so far I am really glad that he did. We got this!

  • I am a doctor and I have depression and anxiety from 1984 onwards.I have been having SEVERE INCAPACITATING OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE NEUROSIS PLUS ANXIETY PLUS UNIPOLAR DEPRESSIONI AM TAKING MEDICINE.HERE ARE MY FEW OBSERVATIONS.:-

    1.THINK THIS TOO SHALL PASS AWAY.

    2.I READ THE BOOK EAT PRAY LOVE AND IT HELPED ME Elizabeth Gilbert.

    3.READ DR BRIAN WEISS'S MANY MASTERS MANY LIVES Book.in which he tells that SOUL IS IMMORTAL4.

    4.DR BRIAN WEISS IS A PAST LIFE THERAPIST.MANY A TIMES HYPNOSIS HELPS.I ,BEING IN INDIA WENT TO DR TRUPTI JAYIN ,WORLI,BOMBAY AND I WAS BENEFITTED,DR TRUPTI JAYIN 099 30 858816.

    5 .

    I regularly do play 35 mins badminton.EXERCISE HELPS.

    6.DR BRIAN WEISS SAYS IN HIS BOOKS THAT BEFORE COMING TO EARTH WE VIEW AND ACCEPT OUR LIFE BEFOREHAND I.e. We are aware of all the events of our coming life and only after we give consent we come to this earth.

    7.We chose our would be parents

    8.Dr shakuntala modi,a USA based psychiatrist has written we may be a house of many foreign spirits run by Satan.Prayers can help us getting rid of these spirits.She has. Given the prayer in her book.She says there are many invisible Guardian angels in our environment,who by their very nature are our servants .They are wise beings .But they can only help us only when we ask for their help.They without fail help us,but cannot help us on their own.when in trouble ,say angels help me and help is received.I am not joking .This is happening with me a common being..you may not be able to visualise them but they are very much there.

    9.Dr Brian Weiss is in Miami USA.he says there are a few births where soul undergoes evolution.This birth is really tough and we eventually evolve in this birth.we are lucky to have birth in the form of human beings.we are not animals ,/ birds.,in depression and anxiety one feels like one is dying and any petty thing appears lethal .life appears threatening and dangerous but all this is a part of disease,the result of chemicals getting less in the brain.only a person who has undergone this experiences how tough it is.God is always loving and forgiving.he is our father.he never punishes us.can a father punish ones own kin.he has given us an opportunity for our betterment and growth.above each and every word I mean.it is not only to console you.it IS A FACT.

    LASTLY I AM TRYING COGNITIVE BEHAVIOUR THERAPY.IT CAN BE GIVEN BY A PSYCHIATRIST OR A COUNSELLOR.WE GET RID OF ANXIETY AND DEPRESSIONBY changing our thoughts.I have just started doing.in this we write our thoughts

    ONE THING I TELL U .ONCE YOU MOVE OUT OF DEPRESSIONYOU ARE REJUVENATED.YOU HAVE TREMENDOUS ENERGY.THEN YOU WILL NEVER LOOK BACK.

    Hope I HAVENOT bored you.or haVe notbotheredyou.pl keep in touch

  • Dr vishu gurdasani.I am also new

  • Well, we are here. Would you like to talk about what you think caused these problems? Sounds like you have a great husband. You are NOT a freak, and are in good company here. At the same time, remember you have choices, and as long as you do, you are not a victim.

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