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[Helpless03101997]

My boyfriend finally decided my depression and anxiety was too much for him. So I've been down even more the last few days.. I am proud of myself for getting up and out of bed and keeping it together while I'm finishing my work week. But I just come home and lay in bed and hug his shirt and cry my eyes out until it's time to go to bed.. he hasn't tried to contact me in days, even though he knows all about how it would be effecting me. I feel so down and thrown away and given up on.. I finally made an appointment to see a doctor about my options and medication.. I guess that's a step forward. But the soonest appointment is a month from next week.. I just hope I can make it that long. I wish my boyfriend would be there for me.. well I guess he's not actually my boyfriend anymore..

[BonnieSue]

It stinks, doesn't it? Anytime a boyfriend decides to cut out because he doesn't care to stick around when times get tough just plain STINKS!! Now you know how he would react when you would have money problems, in-law problems, baby problems, other medical problems, you-name-it problems. He'd be gone with the wind. Don't think for a minute he'd leave only for this particular problem. Uh-uh. He's a quitter and a walker-outer. And there will always be tough times. I'm sorry he couldn't make the grade and had to sadden you. But this is who he is. A big disappointment.

He's also been a big motivator for you. Look at how you pushed through the work week, isn't that awesome? Not fun at all, but awesome. And you made that much needed appointment with the Doctor. Fantastic action for yourself! Of course you'll make it, what else would you do? And you'll begin your journey to feeling better. Even more awesome! I know it'll be a struggle to wait until then, but you can do it, even if you have to take some time off. You are sick, truly sick, if you have to call in sick or take a leave of absence, you aren't lying. You can even have the Dr. fill out a form for you if need be to take back to work. A discrete one that doesn't say anything you want kept private.

Write again if you need to and please let me know how you're doing down the road. Take care. I have a list of non-drug things you can listen to or workbooks you can use to help yourself cope better if you're interested. Just let me know and I'll post the list for you. You also need a counselor besides a Dr. for coping with these problems and the meds and working and so forth. It's standard procedure and well worth it. Please think about it.

Blessings...

[TAPNewEngland]

Unfortunately it might be time to move on from him. It's so important to have someone in your life who understands what you are going through and be supportive. Does your employer have an Employee Assistance Program? Check with your HR department; you might be able to see someone quicker.