Dealing with Anxiety and Depression & finding myself

[jalehnicole]

So two days ago me and my boyfriend of a year and a half decided to take a break. This break was for me to really find myself and to make myself better for this relationship. Right now, I don’t even know where to begin. I was always questioning who he was hanging out with or who he was actually talking to. I guess I constantly made him feel untrusted and undervalued. This all leads back to past relationships that really broke me. I don’t know what to even do, I need to get him back, but where do I start..?

[Kat63]

You’re taking a break, but you want to get back with him. Does he know that you don’t want the “break” to be forever?

[jalehnicole in reply to Kat63]

Yes, he doesn’t want the break to be forever also

[Kat63 in reply to jalehnicole]

OK, if you guys have talked about it, that’s good. Did you talk about how long the break is going to be - did you set an end date? And I’m guessing that “break” means you’ll spend less time together. What do you plan to do with the extra time you’ll have on your hands? It might be a good time to take classes or explore some of your interests.

[jalehnicole in reply to Kat63]

We haven’t set an exact time but whenever I get myself back to normal. When he sees that I am better. And yes I don’t think we are really going to “see” each other. I’m taking summer classes at my campus and I’m also working.

[PekeLover]

Hi! I just posted a reply to the lady right above your post. Name Lena something. I think it may be more a reply for your situation! I have cramped fingers so don't want to retype here. Sorry. If you don't see it, please let me know. May help. I had success and am happy now.

[jalehnicole in reply to PekeLover]

Unfortunately I can’t see it!

[PekeLover in reply to jalehnicole]

Her name was Lena something and she asked if anyone had BPD(as well as Bipolar which I don't have). I told her about my 2 month break with my boyfriend and what we did to make things work. See if you can find it now. My fingers thank you!

[jalehnicole in reply to PekeLover]

I finally saw it! Thank you, we just are taking a “break” from our relationship and he just wants me to be better for myself before we try the relationship again.

[SilverLinings24]

when we have a past of mistrust it often follow us down the line. It took me a couple of years to start trusting my husband, boyfriend at the time. Between growing up in a dysfunctional family, followed by cheaters and abusers it created a major wall of mistrust. It’s possible to work on it with patience and maybe having the self confidence that if anything like that happens you deserve better and have the strength to walk away.