Going crazy!

Never realized how much quitting smoking would make me go crazy. Today I am so angry with everyone. It's not their fault...it's mine. I hate what cigarettes have done to my life...and i hate who they have made me become these past three weeks. I want to put on a nicotine patch so badly just to let the withdraws go away, but I feel that would just make me want to smoke worse.

19 Replies

  • I went cold turkey which can be somewhat harder initially than using NRT.   I can relate to "not" wanting to use NRT and staying nic-free.   However, so many people are successful in the long-run after using NRT products - you might want to consider it after all.     TO not actually smoke  (NOPE) is the day to day and long term goal.    Don't be too hard on yourself.

  • I agree with that totally Dunn MmeT

  • Bless you Kimberly, cold turkey is the mother of  beelzebub! I know, I did it. Don't feel bad about your feelings, they are perfectly normal and are probably more distressing to you than those round you....although I did drop a C bomb at my hubby when he was trying to be helpful. If you can keep going cold turkey that's great but if it's a choice between a cigarette and a patch go for the patch every time. You've done so well you would be so unhappy I'd you had a ciggy and there really is no shame at all in NRT. Go with what you need to do to keep you smoke free 😊 good luck x

  • Hi Kimberly! Well, I reckon there's not one of us who can't relate to what you're feeling right now in your quit journey. We've been there. Just waiting for an excuse - any little excuse - to act out and run havoc. The ones nearest and closest to us take it harder, of course. Bless them. And bless you and you know what? It goes away. It gets better. Of course you'll always have some occasion here and there where you wish you could slap someone, but hey - who doesn't?

    My quit was assisted: I decided I wanted all guns on my side of the war, so I took Champix and got myself a vaper with low-nic content. I'm off Champix for a few months now, but I still vape although now I vape with no-nic liquids. I completely respect - and admire - your determination to quit cold-turkey, but please don't beat yourself up too much.

    Hang in there, girl. You're winning this. :-)

  • The flipside is sometimes Im sooo nice now it scares me--but boy I was a demon for a while--Hang in there--If it wasn't a bugger we wouldn't all be here--xxxx MmeT   Use NRT if need be----This is a tough drug--and you will get off it-why suffer so if you don't have to. Don't be scared of NRT--Believe me you wont want to stay on that It isn't a substitute--just a gradual come down----I did E-cig--and no problem weaning off that---Keep us up to date--The brutal honesty  you can  communicate here really helps----There is always someone to love you ,understand and carry you when you feel like you are going bonkers--so use the site extensively!! It is a wonderful thing.....

  • Hi Kimberley yeah I remember that you feel so angry and furious you could run someone over in your car. It doesn't last that long. Put a patch on it will help u not smoke it won't make you have one 😀

  • kIm--are you going cold turkey? sounds like you are having a helluva time--MmeT

  • You're not going crazy hun, it's just a natural reaction😡 dont worry it will pass and do whatever it takes to keep you smokefree🚭

    You may mindfulness helpful in these situations. 3 easy steps to kickstart mindfulness....... 1) STOP 2) BREATHE 3) THINK about NOW as opposed to past or future. This can be used to stay calm, focused and optimistic. When your attention shifts, breathe and continue. It does take a bit of practice but well worth it.

    Be proud of your 3 weeks cold turkey coz you're doing brilliant👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼😊

  • I am proud but if the panic/anxiety gets worse...I do have nicotine patches for emergency. I feel a little better now (it comes and goes). I appreciate everyone listening. This site has helped so much.

  • Oh Kimberley I was where you are..... I just wanted to thump someone, anyone! It's not great but it does go away 😊 

    Cold turkey is awesome and so is 3 weeks quits😊👍 only you can know what's best for you and what you need to do not to light up..... We are behind you 100% 😊

    NOPE all the way 😊🍀🍀🍀🚭🚭🚭

  • Arhhh Kimberley I forgot about that period . I think it was about 3 weeks in to my quit thinking back. Funny I don't remember when I stopped being so horrible especially to my poor hubby. So there you go it does pass and get easier. I do remember I just wanted to snap at everything he did and said :( it's awful now I think back. Stay strong you have done brilliant  , but don't struggle , better NRT than smoking , you have come so far :) x

  • I so remember them days😫😫😫 I would tell everyone, I was having a " body think it needs a smoke day" and I fighting with myself..please be patient.....my colleagues used to laugh at me...and hubby would say..thanks for the heads up😊🙃 you do what you have to do to get through ...this does pass..for me it passed quite quickly, so I hope it does for you 😀😀👍👍🚭🚭🚭🚭

  • Hi Kimberley, i hated everyone and everything in the first few weeks of giving up, so dont think your on your own with this!!! 

    Maybe it would be worth getting some gum or a spray, low in nicotine unlike the patches, but may take the edge off for you.  Keep close and let us know how you get on :) 

  • I've nearly done 3 weeks cold turkey - 30 - 40 a day smoker for 30+ years. The first week was a breeze, then I hit a huge wall. I posted here yesterday about feeling really low etc. However, I feel great again today - two steps forward and one back, you know??

    Definitely use NRT rather than smoke, but if you don't have to use NRT then leave it alone. You're not suffering nicotine withdrawal now, it's emotional. Your brain knows something's missing and is twisting everything to make you think you want to smoke. It works a bit like this, apparently:

    When you make a big lifestyle change your brain misses what you were doing (even if it's bad for you) It gets more and more panicked until it's screaming "where's the thing, where's the thing - we need that thing we haven't got that we want. We must have the thing" LOL - that looks funny written down. The 'thing' could be tobacco, alcohol, cocaine, chocolate etc etc. As soon as you stop doing it, your brain notices and starts to worry (sort of)

    To build it's case for you going off and getting 'the thing' it wants it'll paint lovely pictures of it for you; how much happier you were when you were doing it (i.e. smoking), how much you enjoyed it and how miserable you are now without it. It's all very one sided, and most the time you don't know its doing it. It's basically how addiction works, I'm told. All of the bad things get conveniently pushed right to the back of your mind (stinking, coughing, dying early, money spent etc)

    Apparently you can combat this by visualising yourself in the midst of your biggest fear about smoking (having severe COPD or Cancer etc) every time you think about cigarettes. After not too long your brain will get the message and start supporting you in your change. Your brain will definitely get used to not having 'the thing'. 

    I'm spending a small fortune on a therapist to help me through all this and the above is what she told me last night. I've had no problems today, now that I know and understand what's going on.

    Reading this back, it all sounds a bit nuts lol. I hope it all made some sort of sense.

  • No that does not sound nuts at all! I completely understand what you are saying. I have a Bachelor's degree in social and behavioral science....I took classes on addiction and therapy. However, it was not until I gave up smoking that I realized I am an addict too. Life is full of challenges and this is one that I can't wait to be over. One day I am fine...next day I am freaking out full of panic/anxiety. I go to see an acupuncturist and a reiki doctor  on Monday....I pray they can shed some light on the way I am feeling. I am just glad that I am not alone.

  • that is very sound advice...it's so true...we do..well...I do panic when my thing of comfort is taken from me..when I moved 5.5 years ago, I didn't want to pay for Cable TV, and I was so sad that I couldn't watch my shows, and realized I listened to it to help me sleep and all heck broke loose! but after a few months, it became normal and I didn't mind it so much.

    just thinking of other things, when I'm sick if I can't find my fuzzy socks that keep my feet comfy I'll tear my house apart to find them coz nothing feels right without them!

  • Hey Cpt,

    You're right.... My dependence on cigarettes ran its course after 5 months and without trying, I developed other coping mechanisms ... So now when my day is stressful or a mess, I don't want to smoke ... Thank God for all you beautiful people ❤️👍🏻  Thank you for helping me not light up xx

  • The first part of your statement "it's not their fault...it's mine" is incorrect, the second part "I hate what cigarette have done to my life" there is the proper blame!

    the only thing you are at fault of right now, is getting healthier and not letting Mr. Nic bully you around!

    I quit cold turkey 11 days ago, and have the same fear as you that at this point, if I used an NRT I would go backwards and need to smoke.

    walking helps, deep breathing helps, I down a bottle of water at times which helps..and I have had to circle back a few times now, one on one, and explain to someone what I am going through, and apologize about my reaction to something.

    hang in there!

  • Kimberly, Put on the patch--its ok--you will get there regardless if your mind is made up--to much to soon is agony--You can go  cold if you want but many of us have succeeded by gradual withdrawal-- xxx MmeT

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