Hi, my wife completes her first round of six cycles of carboplatin and paclitaxel by end May 2016. In your individual and collective experiences, how long do you think it will take for her to completely recoup herself from the effects of chemo and get to near normal? Just a ball park time hop will help. Thanks
Naimish
Hi Naimish
Well I finished Feb 16 and I'm fairly active now but I notice that when I get tired my chemo side effects come back a bit ...so normal but with reservations. I have heard others say it takes months and months but everyone is different xx
First line to get back to my 'New Normal' it took around 12months for all side effects to wear off. Hope this helps but everyone is different. Best wishes Trish
Everyone is different. Surgeons say it can take up to 2 years to recover completely from surgery. I was told it took six months to recover from chemo. I recovered slowly but surely. Within 3 months I was doing everything I usually did, although I did get tired. Within 6 months physically I was more or less well, apart from the twinges from surgery that I still feel years later. Emotional recovery takes longer. I was afraid that every little ache heralded a recurrence.
I'd advise you to avoid long flights for the first year or so, unless you can go in Business or First. Also long car trips, unless you can stop frequently. Very best wishes to you both, your wife is lucky to have a pro-active partner. Vx
Thank you so much for the elaborate response and practical do's and dont's. Will surely bear these in mind going forward. And well, wrt my proactivity, her having given me her complete support since 38 years, it's the least that I can do.
Naimish
Hi Naimish
Your wife is a lucky lady to have such a supportive husband.
I have two lots of surgery for my borderline tumour , no chemo, and this took ages to get over...in fact 6years on I am still improving. I'm sure that you will do what my husband and the scores of loving partners out there did...smother her with love and affection and support . Keeping as physically active as you possibly can is incredibly important and have lots of treats ...a massage , a meal out with friend , weekends away once she is up for it. Staying as socially active as you can helps loads.
Good luck to you both xxx
Thank you very much for the good words. She recovered very well from the debulking being non diabetic, non hypertensive and no cholesterol issues. It's the chemo that is hitting her physical and mental wellbeing. She is still shying away from meeting people as she is probably not yet come to terms with her appearance post chemo. It's four months already since Stage 3C of PPC was diagnosed , a day before our annual vacation to Koh Samui in Thailand. Will try to inch her back to socialising as you said. Meantime take care and wish you get back all your strength asap.
Naimish
HI Naimish, I would say about twelve months for any where near normal, post Chemo your wife has to build back up her stamina. Short walks and increasing them will certainly help but baby steps at first. Do plan a weekend away for Mid July when she will feel more up to it. Plenty of treats, day trips, meals out anything you think will take her mind off hospital appointments. I hope she is doing well at the moment on treatment and can get out and about on the good days. There is a new normal, you dont go back to the old normal as energy levels do drip a bit. Maybe find a Cancer Support Group near you for counselling and light reflexology. Also some Centres do a Look good and feel good workshop for patients so ye could enquire about that. Best wishes
Thank you Suzuki for your reply as I so much look forward to your responses always full of positive energy. The 'new normal' - this is indeed a huge take home message which I have shared with my wife this morning, as I (normally) do. Initially she was rather down that she will not be herself again but I reasoned with her the meaning of 'new normal' and hopefully she will come to terms with it.
Naimish
Hi Naimish,
I'm a year from the end of chemo and have to pace myself,have a loss of strength due to muscle loss and if I get tired I rest.
However, I look after my 2 year old grandson 2 days a week, have helped do up 3 houses in the last year, go on holidays, concerts,run a house and have a life as busy and active as I can.I would suggest there are no limitations,but it's very much what she feels like doing, with plenty of rest, we are all different.
You even asking the questions show's you are a caring person and will be tolerant to whatever her normal is
Regards
Carole
First of all Carole , I doff my (non existent) hat to you. Amazing attitude and boundless energy. Wow! Just imagine what a Superwoman you will be once you are done with the chemo. Will set you up as an example to her.
Naimish
Thank you Naimish, try my best but I have to add, I know my limitations,we aren't all the same,but there will be a new normal as Suzuki said.The important thing is that you are there to understand when she is tired and at times down as we all are,but life is for living and all around me (I'm sure you will be too),encourage an up and onwards attitude,
Best wishes
Carole
Hi Namish 
I finished a 6 course round of Carbo/Taxol on March 4.
At the moment, my "normal" is how I was feeling in the last week of the 3 week cycle. If I don't do to much, I feel pretty good... If I do to much, I wipe myself out.
I still have a lot of hip pain, (NOTHING on the pain during chemo, but still a problem) and muscle aches... And this morning I have woken up with a numb/tingly left hand for some reason. But I still feel pretty good.
I visited my new, and my old job this week, and managed to get through the equivalent of two shifts... Which I wasn't expecting to be able to do.
You mentioned that your wife was having problems socializing. I still struggle going out for dinner, even with good friends. It's not so much the appearance issues for me (although the eyebrow-less period certainly didn't help - thankfully they're back to almost normal 6 weeks after my last session) but I developed a bit of a hearing issue while on chemo, and the chemo-brain makes it harder to have conversations. I'll loose sentences mid way through still, and I don't seem to have the ability to "fill the gaps" if I can't hear a word in a sentence.
Both are getting much better than they were, but it's going to be a few months before it's "normal" again at this rate.
As a result, socializing is really draining (especially because I'm an introvert anyway) and sometimes all it does is remind me about how much has changed, and how much I have changed.
My partner has been stealthily doing the same thing you are, and slowly helping me back into our social circle (I only just twigged that's what he's doing, lmao) and he's planned dinners and lunches with our most supportive friends every weekend since chemo ended.
And it's starting to feel normal again. I'm starting to be able to just go "Yeah.. Missed all of that, chemo's a bitch," rather than feel awkward about not understanding something.
I sort of feel like I'm peeping out from under the wreckage of my old life. It all crashed down on my head when I got cancer, and now I'm not so much rebuilding as emerging from under the wreckage.
Occasionally I'll feel the need to scuttle back under that wreckage where it's familiar and quiet and safe... but eventually I'll be able to clear away that wreckage and rebuild instead.
It's just going to take a while... And that's OK.
Hi
I would say it took me a good six months to even begin to have more energy, then anther six making gradual progress not just physically but also mentally. Some really good days then a few rotten ones. My husband has been brilliant very supportive, but at times I have said I feel better than I actually do as I know he has found this journey tough too. Weekends away and doing nice things like yesterday seeing all the bluebelles in the local woods all help. All the best Dee
Dear Dee, my wifes "bestest" friend is also called Dee.
So, 6+6 seems more like it. Yeah? My best wishes to your loving brilliant supportive husband and you and am sure that the rottens will be obliterated soon.
Keep the faith since we are birds of similar feather, if not the same feather.
Naimish
I gradually gained more energy but wouldn't say I was back to my previous energy levels for a year. I found exercise helped a lot. Just gentle stuff like walking, swimming and aquafit. Last year after recovering from second line I was walking the Pennine Way, up to 14 miles in a day, but just one or two days at a time so I had time to recover. We have a pretty canal path that is parallel to a road so I started building up stamina on that as I could go and catch a bus back if the walking got too much. Of course it was fairly flat as well with teashops either end for a rest and a treat.
Hmmm thanks Leslie, so its about a year depending.........on.............
Btw, kudos to your stamina1
Cheers
Naimish
Everyone's different though and it gradually improves over the weeks and months.
Hi naimish just been reading all your posts and the one from indigo I can relate to. I finished chemo in December I do still get a bit tired , but like indigo my hearing as been affected also I forget things. I start a sentence and part way through forget what I was talking about. Lol 😁
But my oncologist says that can happen, Sending big hugs to you and your lovely wife. Bless you both. Julie xx
Indeed Juliette , from the signs and likes of it, appears that my wife Gauri may go through similar traits wrt socialising and energy levels. However her hearing (she can hear an insect crawl whereas my partial deafness insulates me from the unwanteds) and memory and mental prowess have not deteriorated one bit. Thank you so much for the blessings.
Naimish
hello....am stage 4, 5 months out from chemo and surgery. energy level waxes and wanes..truly it is a "new normal" and i dare not expect the return of the old. ( was in very good shape prior to all this) ---patience, and enjoying the gift of continued presence in the world has helped me. do not expect what was normal before. support, rather than insistent prompting, is a gift.
Yes Kagan, we are all now agreed on the new "normal" and with a new look at life itself?
Naimish
indeed. although i would suggest that the "look" is not new, but rather the eternal reality. best wishes to your wife and you.
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