485 days

[KathieO]

I have been nicotine free for 485 days. Yesterday I had a melt down over a huge fight and smoked a cigarette. I have to say I enjoyed it. In fact I smoked a few yesterday. But I don’t think I’m going to let 1 day conquer 485 days. I really don’t want to smoke. Yesterday was a weird day.

[RoisinO1 Administrator 3 Years Smoke Free]

Oh KathieO , sorry to read you lapsed ☹

It is your personal decision whether to reset your smoke free journey again but unfortunately I will have to remove your over a year smoke free badge.

We have seen it here in the past with members not resetting and numerous relapses until they are back full time smoking. By resetting you have the much needed discipline to remain smoke free and not make it easier for you to reach for one the next time you have a bad day.

It is also quite alarming after all this time that you enjoyed it and smoked several. You have shown huge strength and determination and offered amazing support, help and advice here.

Wishing you to get that back and really reflect on what happened yesterday as you have been so strong 💪

[KathieO 100 Days Smoke Free in reply to RoisinO1]

Thanks RoisinO1. I had to tell someone what I did so I did it here. Today is a new day and I feel better than the day before. New day new start new journey🌹

[RoisinO1 Administrator 3 Years Smoke Free in reply to KathieO]

It took guts KathieO to come on here to let us know what happened. Unfortunately, SO many don't I know you will come back stronger and here's to a new journey, stay close to us and know that we are here for you at anytime 💐🌷🌷🌼🌻

[KathieO 100 Days Smoke Free in reply to RoisinO1]

Oh I will. This site is a huge support system.

[KatNL 6 Months Smoke Free in reply to KathieO]

Hi KathieO . I have dreams about smoking and loving it. I didn't quit because I hate smoking. I quit because I knew i had to . It is so hard because I loved it. Hope you go back to no smoking. After reading your post I could feel that good feeling and that feeling in my lungs and KNEW it was an addiction feeling, so I turned my mind from it before it reeled me back in... I hope you do too.. I'm wishing you very good luck, and also am thinking of you. Thank you so much for posting. And for being so honest. I'm about two months now, still on the patch and wondering how I will do without any "help" from nicotine when I stop using the patches as well.

[KathieO 100 Days Smoke Free in reply to KatNL]

I know it awful to say I enjoyed it. I am not smoking now and my target is to stay that way. I’ve always said I’m a smoker who doesn’t smoke. Cigarettes are a challenge every day. I have withdrawal symptoms but they are mild. So just one wakes up the demon. So really if I’m allowed to give advice i broke the golden rule: you can’t even pick one up. So we have to keep strong together with this site and with each other.

[KatNL 6 Months Smoke Free in reply to KathieO]

That's a good way to put it - a smoker who doesn't smoke- not awful to say you enjoyed it, honest. If it was awful, no one would smoke, right

[KathieO 100 Days Smoke Free in reply to KatNL]

Exactly. We all know there’s nothing good about it or we wouldn’t be here.

[Scarlet123 3 Years Smoke Free in reply to KathieO]

KathieO, back with is again. hurrah 😀 🦋🌹🤸‍♂️💃💪

[Scarlet123 3 Years Smoke Free in reply to Scarlet123]

Can’t type...back with us!!

[RoisinO1 Administrator 3 Years Smoke Free in reply to KatNL]

Continue with your plan on the gradual reduction of the patches KatNL , have faith and belief in yourself as you have a fantastic mindset and working very hard and can see no problem to you when you stop the patches

[RoisinO1 Administrator 3 Years Smoke Free in reply to KathieO]

How is things now KathieO , you back on the horse?

[KathieO 100 Days Smoke Free in reply to RoisinO1]

Hi RoisinO1. I have not smoked since that day. I will say at first I didn’t care and I had fun with the cigarettes. But then this week I saw a video on relapse and then I started feeling bad about it. I lost my day. I lost my victory. I awoke the monster and now the need to defend myself like I worked so hard before. So back on the saddle we go

[RoisinO1 Administrator 3 Years Smoke Free in reply to KathieO]

Hey KathieO , great to read, please don't dwell on what has happened, you are back on the horse and that is all that matters. Stay close to us

[RoisinO1 Administrator 3 Years Smoke Free in reply to RoisinO1]

1 month now KathieO - how is things?

[KathieO 100 Days Smoke Free in reply to RoisinO1]

Everything is going well. I’m still smoke free !😊

[RoisinO1 Administrator 3 Years Smoke Free in reply to KathieO]

Good to read KathieO

[KathieO 100 Days Smoke Free in reply to RoisinO1]

Thanks for thinking of me. I appreciate that 😊💕

[Quit4Money 1 Year Smoke Free 9 Months Smoke Free]

Good for you for being honest. Do not let a relapse determine your commitment to being smoke free.

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Stay strong with your goals when you first quit smoking .Never forget that one cigarret that you smoke , prepares you and creates a desire for the next one . That’s why is an addiction ! Best of luck