Difficult couple of hours but into day 20

I have been fine today. Work was incredibly busy and I didn't have time to pop on here at lunch time, which was okay. I've been dealing with the little hurdles well - those points during my smoking day when I would, errr, smoke and haven't! Went straight to a school meeting from work, fine, then home, had dinner, fine. Then I called my mother who since my father's death three months ago is alone in a small isolated village, two buses a week, cannot drive, no shops etc. And she is doing okay, considering. However, I had a whammy moment, a strong desire to smoke, and it is very easy for me to get cigarettes. The urge was very strong, so I've focused on breathing, saying NOPE to myself, and came on here, posted a couple of responses to messages, and am now much more relaxed and the moment has passed.

Just goes to show how I have used smoking at times to deal with difficult emotions. I do feel raw at times regarding my father; and I would like to be closer to my parent's home to support my mother. But...............I also recognise that I have come through these couple of hours. I have found ways to deal with the crave. I am going to have a glass of wine now to toast myself and go to bed. Enough for today!

11 Replies

  • And doing so very well indeed I can honestly say there will come a time, when you won't think of smoking in whatever difficulty comes your way.

    So sorry to read you lost your dad, but my word such strength you have in your quit. Doing great well done.

    I think half the battle is knowing our triggers and dealing with them, WOW that's just what you did.

    Be proud,

  • Keep it up Walkabout my friend - you're doing great stuff :) Face down every battle with a NOPE and a ROOOAAARR and a big grin - we can do this!

  • Just keep kicking the hell out of Mr Nick he will lay down and die soon I'm sure. We quit on the same day so looking forward to seeing you in the next room. Bring cake xx

  • Well done on not smoking. I had a massive wobble on day 21, must be something in the air around that time! Keep going, you can do this x

  • You are doing so well. I have major associations with smoking and drinking and also like you with dealing with stress/ difficult emotions. Don't know about you but I love it when people who have reached the penthouse tell us that there will come a time when thoughts of smoking won't keep hammering us in these times. Keep at it I think we are re training our brains x

  • Yes, I know what you mean about people further down the path saying there will come a time. But I suppose when we actually reflect on it, there's a hell of a lot of time when we already are not thinking about it! But it's very easy to forget that, because, errr, we're not thinking about it!

    That does make sense.....honest

  • Congratulations be proud of yourself your a non smoker

  • Thanks for all the positive and supportive comments folks. Really appreciated. And yes, I'm still a non-smoker into day 21. New room tomorrow evening. See you there spanisheyes. What kind of cake would you like? I'll try not to eat it before I arrive.

  • Good work WAB, really pleased for you, also if you are doing a cake run can I have a split doughnut please, synthetic cream not real :D xxxx

  • On its way. How much will arrive though is a different matter, going by how many cakes, puddings, chocolate bars I'm scoffing at the moment..............

  • I'm exactly the same.... Actually I could eat an eclair quite easily right now :)

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