Today I've decided to stop smoking - again. I had my last last last cigarette about an hour ago. I've been down this path before, though. The last time I quit, I didn't have a smoke for nearly 9 months, but a few drinks too many, and particularly bad time, was all it took to make me light up.
This time it has to be different, because I simply can't afford it. Unfortunately, the reason I can't afford it makes it a particularly difficult time to stop. I have severe clinical depression and a lovely mix of problems related to social anxiety disorder and OCD. I was prescribed some anti-depressives, which worked wonders for my fear of gamma-ray bursts and planes dropping bombs on me, but not very much for the depression itself. It really didn't help with the problems of going out and dealing with people, either. As you've probably gathered, I'm unable to work and have to rely on benefits for any income. As I'm still breathing, I've been judged fit for work and my benefits are being stopped. I simply don't have the energy or mental resources to appeal the decision, nor am I able to go and sign on every week. The job centre is terrifying for me, and they won't let me sign on via email. Apparently, there's some merit making a grown man shake and cry while you belittle and harass him.
Cutting this long story short - I have no money for cigarettes, though I do have somewhere to live, so it's not all bad. This time I've decided to stop cold turkey, and I'll be using some mental techniques I've been reading about - mindfulness, comedy, cute baby animals (this is a real thing, looking at pictures boosts your willpower), and inspiring videos/people. The inspiring people part is why I'm here, as well as having people to talk to that are stopping as well. I hope I can bring something positive to the community, and I look forward to making some stopped-smoking-buddies (the name may need to be worked on :D).
Thanks for reading.