Failed at day 13: Argh. So disappointed with... - No Smoking Day

No Smoking Day

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Failed at day 13

nsd_user663_8848 profile image
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Argh. So disappointed with myself. Got through 13 days, but just caved in this afternoon and bought a pack :0(

First few days went perfectly, but from about day 9 onwards it was torture. I just felt so bad, and just couldn't take it anymore. Feel a bit of a failure, but still want to stop.

Any advice?

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nsd_user663_8848
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nsd_user663_5325 profile image
nsd_user663_5325

Originally Posted by CatWoman View Post

Before you fall off the wagon and nip off to buy the fags you have convinced yourself you NEED ... please read the following first, hopefully it will change your mind, such a shame to lose a quit just because your mind is in the wrong place at the moment.

JUNKIE THINKING: One puff wont hurt.

RESPONSE: One puff will always hurt me, and it always will because Im not a social smoker. One puff and Ill be smoking compulsively again.

JUNKIE THINKING: I only want one.

RESPONSE:I have never only wanted one. In fact, I want 20-30 a day, every day. I want them all.

JUNKIE THINKING: ll just be a social smoker.

RESPONSE: Im a chronic, compulsive smoker, and once I smoke one Ill quickly be thinking about the next one.

JUNKIE THINKING: Im doing so well, one wont hurt me now

RESPONSE: The only reason Im doing so well is because I havent taken the first one. Yet once I do, I wont be doing well anymore. Ill be smoking again.

JUNKIE THINKING: ll just stop again.

RESPONSE: Sounds easy, but who am I trying to kid? Look how long it took me to stop this time. And once I start, how long will it take before I get sick enough to face withdrawal again? In fact, when Im back in the grip of compulsion, what guarantee do I have that Ill ever be able to stop again?

JUNKIE THINKING: If I slip, Ill keep trying.

RESPONSE: If I think I can get away with one little slip now Ill think I can get away with another little slip later on.

JUNKIE THINKING: I need one to get me through this withdrawal.

RESPONSE: Smoking will not get me through the discomfort of not smoking. It will only get me back to smoking. One puff stops the process of withdrawal and Ill have to go through it all over again.

JUNKIE THINKING: I miss smoking right now.

RESPONSE: Of course I miss something Ive been doing every day for most of my life. But do I miss the chest pain right now? Do I miss the worry, the embarrassment? Id rather be an ex-smoker with an occasional desire to smoke, than a smoker with a constant desire to stop doing it.

JUNKIE THINKING: I really need to smoke now, Im so upset.

RESPONSE: Smoking is not going to fix anything. Ill still be upset, Ill just be an upset smoker. I never have to have a cigarette. Smoking is not a need; its a want. Once the crisis is over, Ill be relieved and grateful Im still not smoking.

JUNKIE THINKING: I dont care.

RESPONSE: What is it exactly that I think that I dont care about? Can I truthfully say I dont care about chest pain? I donât care about gagging in the morning? I dont care about lung cancer? No, I care about these things very much. Thats why I stopped smoking in the first place.

JUNKIE THINKING: What difference does it make, anyway?

RESPONSE: It makes a difference in the way I breathe, the way my heart beats, the way I feel about myself. It makes a tremendous difference in every aspect of my physical and emotional health.

JUNKIE THINKING: "I'm bored"

RESPONSE: Smoking is an "activity" or "something to do" only for smokers. I'm really not "doing" anything when I smoke except still sitting/standing there. The rest of the world survives occasional boredom quite well without inhaling life-challenging chemicals.

JUNKIE THINKING: "But they've been smoking on TV and in the movies for years! There are even magazines devoted to tobacco products!

RESPONSE: That's right. They were on TV for years, I wasn't. I'm still alive; many of them aren't and they departed this vale of tears in prolonged and painful ways. And the smiling faces in the magazines now are risking painful and disfiguring surgery later, at which point they won't be smiling at all.

JUNKIE THINKING: "Its so nice to go out for a 'breath of fresh air' and a cigarette."

RESPONSE: Fresh air? I've got to be kidding. And face it, sunny days are one thing, but how many days do I huddle out in the rain with the rain hitting the cigarette and turning the cigarette paper that disgusting yellow color? How many times is it windy and it takes forever to keep a match or lighter lit long enough to light the cigarette, and then how often does a gust of wind come up and blow the ashes into my eyes?

nsd_user663_8848 profile image
nsd_user663_8848

Wow - some horrible home truths there. I do feel like such a failure for caving in :0(

nsd_user663_5325 profile image
nsd_user663_5325

Accept the fact that these are things your junkie mind thinks and then fight them. Make your decision to quit and stick with it. It you think about lighting up come here and post, go to Utube and look up vids and photos of people that died smoking. There plenty of links here that lead to info that can help you keep quit and educate you. Quitting is not just stopping it need to be a lifestyle choice that you keep doing every day. Post your reasons here and revisit them everyday, help other in time of need when they are having problems.

There ya go

nsd_user663_8685 profile image
nsd_user663_8685

There is no failure except in no longer trying.

throw the fags and continue quitting

nsd_user663_8531 profile image
nsd_user663_8531

There will be very few people on here who haven't at some point stopped smoking only to start again. For me I've had a few serious stops but only because I was forced to. This is the first stop I've consciously made the decision but I feel I was ready and did it on my terms.

I bought two weeks worth of patches and carried them about with me (I work away from home). And on 8 February I decided that was the day I'd stop smoking and put a patch on the next day when I woke up. Nearly 3 weeks later I'm still wearing a patch and still not smoked. I've got a ciggie pack in my bag it did have my last two ciggies in it (only one now as a friend was desperate so I gave one away) and that's staying in my bag as a reminder of my 'old habit'.

When I smoked I'd panic if I didn't have any and when I stopped before the fact I didn't have any made me want one. Now knowing I have an emergency ciggie - I don't have that same urge to go out and buy some. I know it sounds daft but we all have our own ways of coping.

I do love all the phrases posted above and think I'll print them out and carry those in the ciggie pack with me wherever I go. It's been a tough road over the past three weeks but have to say this forum has been my lifeline. Having others share what they're going through makes all the difference. And please don't think of yourself as a failure. We're all one puff away from being a smoker - it's what you decide to do now that will make the difference.

nsd_user663_3728 profile image
nsd_user663_3728

Hi Newbie :)

I'm sorry you started again yesterday but don't beat yourself up about it rather learn from it so it's not likely to happen again as Marcus said there is no failure unless you stop trying I tried many times over the years before I succeeded this time Promise

read on here and the links in our signatures, get to know the enemy and his tricks. he has a lot of them and the more you learn about him the easier your quit will be

Below is my standard welcome and advice post which I try and give all new members

Welcome to the forum and well done on the decision to quit possibly one of the most important you will ever make and you will be losing nothing but you will regain control of your life and that has to be good

You will find all the help and support you need on here as we all help each other just like a family we are here for you every step of the way cheering the good days and sympathising with the bad but the good far outweigh the bad

Read the posts on here you will find a lot of tips and advice and in the signatures of a lot you will find links to other sites just click on them Here are 2 I find very good to start you off whyquit.com and woofmang.com Read, read and then read some more as the more you read and learn about why you smoked and about your addiction the easier your quit will be

This link is good for the psychological part of quitting whyquit.com/whyquit/A_Sympt...

Post often to let us know how you're doing, to rant, rave have a moan whatever you like pretty much anything goes on here OK

Love

Marg

nsd_user663_8607 profile image
nsd_user663_8607

hey newbie

scrap the word failure and see it as a blip. dont be so hard on yourself - this is the most difficult journey anyone of us will ever face.

dont look back, move forward and remember how well you did to get to day 13.

look forward to seeing you soon back at day 14

one day at a time......

nsd_user663_8728 profile image
nsd_user663_8728

the saying i have in my head is that when i am down or upset or angry, that one will not make anything any better! it will not take my sadness away or make me any less angry, for a few mins of pleasure??? as above newbie call it a blip, forget about it and move on, never give up giving up!!!!!

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