Help for family members

[Bobby5000]

Some questions,

1. Forgiveness A family member said my wife is mad at herself and repetively goes over mistakes she made. We moved, it was hard, she made some bad decisions, but everyone does. Historically she made very few bad decisions, did well at work, raised children positively, but now she cannot forgive herself and repetitively goes over things. Even her therapists get annoyed by her inability to discuss what to do now rather than ponder over past mistakes.

2. Medication Her psychiatrist recommended Luvox. She previously had cancer and was amazingly compliant going to each appt, taking every drug but now with menetal health, does not follow instructions, questions their conclusions, and does not follow treatment plans.

3. OCD times What do I do when she morphs into OCD. She'll have a good therapy session, they discuss plans ahead, and then she'll start the day ignoring the plan, and saying something repetitively like I have a fungus in my brain. I feel like screaming why do you want to frustrate yourself. why not get better, be happier, have your family relax, instead of doing things that only make yourself and family unhappy.

4. Daily Schedule I am going to try a daily schedule.

[SCC1]

To your question about why does your wife do well in therapy and then starts to not follow a plan once she is at home-

It may be that she does plan on doing the things her therapist suggests and really want to do better, however once home, all is lost.

I think sometimes even when we have a plan to do something, even if it is a definite plan with detailed points, it can be overwhelming to actually do the work.

Maybe your wife wants to do well, and when she hears what her therapist is telling her at that time, she really does intend to do the work to get better. But when left to work on things w/out the actual freshly said words from her therapist, she finds it hard to apply the plan to her everyday lifestyle. Even w/ help from you or someone else, it may still be too challenging for your wife to comply.

It sounds like you have discussed things w/ her, but maybe try to talk to her about why it's so hard for her to do things she is told by her therapist.

If she doesn't want to do the work to feel better just because she doesn't feel like it, that's another problem.

If your wife doesn't want to take medication or do what her therapist is telling her once she is home, honestly, I would have someone beside her therapist intervene. Maybe a partial hospitalization or a therapist coming to your home to make sure your wife understands the importance of following through w/ her current therapist's suggestions.

The "home" therapist can work with her on different ways to stay w/ a plan and offer advice that maybe your wife will listen to if she knows she's going to be held more accountable.

If you can afford it or through insurance, you can request a therapist come to your home a couple or more times a week. They may come for an hour or two just to check on her, and make sure she is doing what she should.

It is so important to work on getting better when given the chance. A few different times, a long time ago, I hadn't been compliant w/ taking my meds the way I was supposed to, and I got very sick. I would never want to go through that again.

I wish you the best.